Cajun Twelve Days Of Christmas

Discussion in 'Make Me Laugh' started by Ted Richards, Dec 9, 2017.

  1. Ted Richards

    Ted Richards Veteran Member
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    Day 1: Dear Boudreaux, Tanks for de bird in de Pear tree. I fix it las' night with dirty rice. I doan tink de pear tree will grow in de swamp, so I swap it for a Satsuma.

    Day 2: Dear Boudreaux, You letter say you sent two turtle doves, but all I got was two scrawny pigeons. Anyway, I mixed dem with andouille an made some gumbo out of dem.

    Day 3: Dear Boudreaux, Why doan you sent some crawfish? I'm tired of eating dem darn birds. I gave two of dose prissy French chickens to Marie Trahan over at Grans Bayou an fed the tird one to my dog Phideaux. Marie needed some sparing partners for her fighting rooster.

    Day 4: Dear Boudreaux, Mon Dieux! I tol you no more friggin birds. Deez four, what you call dem "calling birds" were so noisy you could hear dem all de way to Napoleonville. I used dere necks for my crab traps, an fed de rest of dem to de gators.

    Day 5: Dear Boudreaux, You finally sen' somethin useful. I like dem golden rings. Me, I hocked dem at da pawn shop in Thibodeaux and got enuf money to fix da shaft on my shrimp boat an buy a round for da boys at de Raisin' Cane Lounge. Merci Beaucoup!

    Day 6: Dear Boudreaux, Couchon! Back to da birds, you Cajun turkey! Poor egg suckin' Phideaux is scared to death at dem six geeses. He tried to eat dems eggs and dey peck de heck out ah his snout. Dey good at eating cockroaches, though. I may stuff one of dem wit erster dressing on Christmas day.

    Day 7: Dear Boudreaux, I'm gonna wring your fool neck next time I see you. Thibeau, da mailman, is ready to kill ya. The merde from all dem birds is stinkin' up his mailboat. He afraid someone will slip on dat stuff and sue him good. I let those seven swans loose to swim on de bayou and some duck
    hunters from Mississippi blasted dem out of de water. Talk to you tomorrow.

    Day 8: Dear Boudreaux, poor ole Thibeau, he had to make tree trips on his mailboat to deliver dem 8 maids a milkin and their cows. One of dem cows got spooked by da alligators and almost tipped over da boat. I doan like dem shiftless maids, me no. I tolt dem to get to work guttin fish and sweepin' the shack but dey say it wasn't in dair contract. Dey probably think dey too good ta skin nutrias I caught las night.

    Day 9: Dear Boudreaux, What you trying to do huh? Thibeau had to borrow the Lutcher ferry to carry dem jumpin twits you call Lords-a-Leaping across the bayou. As soon as dey gots here dey wanted a tea break with crumpets. I doan know what dat means but I says, "Well La Di Da. You get Chicory coffee or nuttin." Mon Dieu, Emile. What I'm gonna feed all dese bozos? Dey too snooty for fried nutria, and de cows done eat my turnip greens.

    Day 10: Dear Boudreaux, You got to be outs you mind! If de mailman don't kill you, I will fo sure. Today he deliver 10 half nikid floozies from Bourbon Street. Dey said dey be "Ladies Dancin" but dey doan act like ladies in front of dose Limey twits. Dey almos left after one of dem got bit by a water moccasin over by da out-house. I had to butcher 2 cows to feed toute le monde an had to get toilet paper; the Sears catalog wasn't good enuf fer dose hoity toity Lords' royal behin.

    Day 11: Dear Boudreaux, where y'at? Cheerio an pip pip. Your 11 pipers piping arrives today from the House of Blues, second lining as dey got off de boat. We fixed snuffed goose and beef jambalaya and we having a fais-do-do. Da new mailman he having a good time, yeah, dancing with de floozies. Thibeau he jump off de Sunshine Bridge yesterday, screaming your name. If you get a mysterious, ticking package in de mail, doan open it.

    Day 12: Dear Boudreaux, I sorry to tell ya but I not your true love anymore, no. After da fais-do-do, I spent de night with Jacque, de head piper. We decide to open a restaurant and gentleman's club on de bayou. The floozies, pardon me, Ladies dancing can make $20 for a table dance, and de Lords can be waiters an valet to park de boats. Since de maids doan have no more cows ta milk, I trained dem ta set my crab traps, watch my trotlines, an run my shrimping business. We will probably gross a million nex year.
     
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  2. Babs Hunt

    Babs Hunt Supreme Member
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    You do know my Family is cajun Ted? Are you making fun of us! :) I'm teasing you of course as we cajuns do love to pass a good time and enjoy humor even when it is about us too. :D

    By the way Boudreaux is my middle daughter's last name by marriage and her husband's by birth and they have a very good sense of humor when they read things like this. :):D
     
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  3. Babs Hunt

    Babs Hunt Supreme Member
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  4. Ted Richards

    Ted Richards Veteran Member
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    You know Cajuns (Arcadians) are just displaced Canadians. When y'all get through with them, we want them back.
     
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  5. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Supreme Member
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    There's an Irish version of the Twelve Days of Christmas - its funny alright (just as above)
    By the twelfth day, 'all' has had enough :p
     
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  6. Babs Hunt

    Babs Hunt Supreme Member
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    We don't keep anyone by force over here Ted...so they are free to leave and return to Canada anytime they want. The last time I heard any of them went to Canada was when a few were drafted during the Viet Nam war and decided to head back your way instead of going to Nam.

    The rest of them are all getting fat and sassy on good times and gumbo! I don't think they will be going back to Canada anytime soon. :)
     
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  7. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    :D:D:D:D

    I wonder if there is a redneck version of that? ;)
     
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  8. Babs Hunt

    Babs Hunt Supreme Member
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    #8
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  9. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    Laughing haha .gif Thanks, @Babs Hunt , that gave me a big laugh.
     
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  10. Louise Williams

    Louise Williams Supreme Member
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    ATT00004-1.jpg

    OH MY COD..
    Good thing im wearing my Depends.
    we use to live in Baton Rouge for almost 10 yrs. and we loved those Cajuns and their food and their music too, and that's about how they talk too.. gotta love those Cajuns..
     
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  11. Louise Williams

    Louise Williams Supreme Member
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    anyone know what happened to Jeff Tracy? not seen him around lately.. I miss his antics and cartoons too,,
     
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  12. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    I suspect he has run off with a blond floozy. :eek::D
     
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  13. Louise Williams

    Louise Williams Supreme Member
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    :Dreally!!! I always pictured him with a dark reddish haired woman..Like this floozy..

    gotta_go_be_back_later.gif
     
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  14. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    She has quite a hitch in her gitalong. If she has her hands (Or whatever) on him, we may never see him again. :eek:
     
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  15. Louise Williams

    Louise Williams Supreme Member
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