Accepting Things That You Don't Like

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Cody Fousnaugh, Oct 15, 2018.

  1. Frank Sanoica

    Frank Sanoica Supreme Member
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    @Sheldon Scott " I can't imagine why anyone would ever disagree with me but I just have to realize some people aren't very smart."

    Um........well, how to say this with grace and tact: Your statement sounds overall to be highly conceited......but maybe you didn't intend that, so........I guess you may imagine the unimaginable.
    Frank
     
    #166
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  2. Patsy Faye

    Patsy Faye Supreme Member
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    Not guilty
     
    #167
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  3. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
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    Blimey.... why so serious,?....I took @Sheldon Scott 's comment to be a joke!!
     
    #168
  4. Sheldon Scott

    Sheldon Scott Supreme Member
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    It was meant to be humorous but of course it's probably true.
     
    #169
  5. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Not everyone is like that and/or don't want to be like that. We definitely aren't.
     
    #170
  6. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    One of the hardest things to overcome in life is that being wrong is not a criminal offense, unless of course that person just robbed a bank or some such.

    From the onset of our lives we have had people “grading” our knowledge and / or being admonished for doing things incorrectly. It’s only natural that after we reach some point in life that we will vigorously clutch on to and defend whatever thought or action we have previously deemed as being correct even though the outcome is truly in error.
    Even the admission of a wrong doing or thought generally isn’t very genuine for to be wrong feels like some giant discredit to our very existence. It embarrasses us and makes us feel less than we wish to feel about ourselves. By nature, we’re all stubborn but some are more willing to learn the truth than others and is directly linked to how much or little we were “graded” during our formative years.

    We’re all taught how to be correct it seems, but no one is truly taught how to react when one is incorrect. I’ve written it several times but to paraphrase T.A. Edison when asked about his failures whilst researching the light bulb: I now know of 2000 ways not to make a light bulb.
    In short, if we could all be as candid and avoid feeling like we’ve just been whipped and accused of some major sin when found to be wrong, we’d all learn a heckova lot more.
     
    #171
  7. Hedi Mitchell

    Hedi Mitchell Supreme Member
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    @Cody Fousnaugh ...
    Cody I am just saying a person can not waste time with what others like or don't like. We can not Fix others. : )
     
    #172
  8. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    Ya know, my dad used to say that a 2x4 between the ears will fix just about any bad attitude but he should have realized that his analysis was incorrect because when he was a lad, he tried to correct my grandpa’s only bull’s attitude and killed it.

    That one act should have shown him that sometimes ya just have to let things be as they are.
     
    #173
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  9. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    I'm just saying that others shouldn't push and/or almost demand that others should believe in what they believe in. I've been guilty of doing some "pushing" on this forum about things that wife and I believe in and don't believe in. Hasn't done me a bit of good and I totally understand why.
     
    #174
  10. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    It kind of depends on the narrative that is presented.
    If a person doesn’t like white bread because of this and that, it shouldn’t phase anyone as to why that person doesn’t like white bread but if that same person came out and said everyone who eats white bread will die 10 years before their time it is a completely different subject is it not?
    It’s a given that I’m probably not going to change that person’s mind about the 10 year claim but I have a tendency to try find proof in order to clear the air for the benefit of anyone that person is trying to convince.

    It’s the same thing in today’s claims by a lot of people who are against all the police because of one or two bad instances by one or two policemen.
    A person can believe what they wish and that’s okay, but when that person tries to act on that belief is when we realize that that person is suffering from the “I’m stupid” syndrome and as we all know, ya can’t fix stupid but we all wish to try just the same.

    Nearly everyone including myself on this very forum have come out and said what their personal preferences are toward whatever and that should be respected as a personal opinion of one’s likes and dislikes even if it’s about one’s love for Miracle Whip.
    But, we have had a couple of people who have not only written about their personal preferences but have also announced that anyone who doesn’t conform to their preference is less than intelligent or some such. Now, since it is unwise to promote a personal attack on that person, one should just walk away shaking their head but let’s face it, it’s hard....very hard.
     
    #175
  11. Peter Renfro

    Peter Renfro Veteran Member
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    Sure you are free to like what you want dislike the same. Once you put your likes and disses on a public forum you have opened the flood gates. Go ahead and dislike gay's,cops, black folks, brown folks,white folks, guns, but you have no right not to expect someone else to disrespect you. People are very passionate about certain things,and will defend their view of right and wrong.
    I would suggest that if you hold controversial views on any subject and just absolutely need to let the world know where you stand, have a thick skin.
     
    #176
  12. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    Well said.
     
    #177
  13. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    Probably any view we have is disliked by someone, and the way that is dealt with is what makes the difference between a friendly place like this one is, and some of the other forums where slamming other viewpoints (and forum members with disliked viewpoints) is allowed.
    Here, we do our best to discuss things and state what we like or believe, or whatever, but do not be rude to other people when we do that.
    When we do get people who think that being rude is necessary, we can only explain that rudeness and disruption is not welcome on this forum, although friendly discussion of our likes and dislikes are fine.
    Disagreeing with someone’s ideas is fine, but attacking the person is a whole different thing, and hopefully you will see the difference , @Peter Renfro .
     
    #178
  14. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    Peter is right. While we have a right to hate whoever we might feel the need to hate, when we display our hatred in a public place, we can expect to be judged by our stated views. There is a recent push to misinterpret the idea of freedom of speech to mean that we shouldn't judge people by what they say, or that tolerance means that we have to support things that others might say or do.

    When I am dealing with people who I actually know, I am usually aware of things about them beyond what they might say in a conversation, so if someone says something that I might think offensive, I am probably not judging them entirely by that conversation. I might know that that person helped someone out when they were in need, or that he is a dependable, responsible person. However, on Internet forums, all that I know about someone is what they say, so we're pretty much left judging the people we meet online by what they say online.

    I have opinions about people in this forum, some of which are good and some of which are not so good, but these opinions are based on what they have said here, and I try to realize that the entirety of a person cannot accurately be based on that. Still, that's all that I have.

    However, when it comes to Internet forums, or at least this one, while you may have formed a bad opinion of another forum member based on what they have said here, that doesn't make it okay to attack them. That would cause me to form a bad opinion about you, as it would adversely effect conversations here.

    Disagree with opinions all that you like, but don't attack other forum members. There is a difference between disagreeing with an opinion and disagreeing with a person. I know that this can be hard to grasp, and I recognize that it's hard to do sometimes, which is why I don't generally stamp things out immediately.

    There is a guy here in town who I consider to be one of the few friends that I have here. If I were in need, and he were in a position to help, I have no doubt that he would. He has supported my right to say things that he disagreed with on more than one occasion, and I consider him to be an honorable person. Yet we disagree far more often than we agree. When my wife and I had an Internet cafe here, I told him that he was the only customer I had who would leave the place yelling at me, yet come back the next day. We argue about issues, we get angry about some of the things we argue about, and we cancel one another's votes in nearly every election, but we don't feel the need to hate one another, and we don't refuse to support one another when that is the right thing to do.

    That is what I hope to accomplish here, and what I have tried to do in every online forum that I have participated in. I don't always accomplish it and, because I am not perfect, I don't expect it from any of you. But I would like to see all of you here trying to differentiate between issues and people.
     
    #179
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2019
  15. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    I do know this...…...I've really learned things from folks on this forum, that is, things about myself. I have left and returned for very good reasons, as in, this forum has very nice folks on it.
     
    #180

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