We’re at my daughter’s babysitting. Been here since lunchtime. It’s now 10 pm and we’re totally worn out. The little ones are fast asleep in bed and it’s time for DH to get this little one ready for bed too. Night night.
Came home late yesterday after two days at our daughter's babysitting. It was fun but we were totally worn out. Our age seems to be catching up with us. The four year old is quite happy to paint and play with Barbie dolls but the little one at fifteen months is like quiksilver, seems to be everywhere at the same time. DH spent a lot of time chasing him round. One favorite pastime is sitting in front of nana in her wheelchair, luckily there's plenty of space there and being driven round though he does like to try and grab the joystick and steer it himself. The drive home took two and a half hours instead of the usual one hour because of torrential rain and some flooding which caused traffic problems. Today we're taking it easy, just doing a little shopping this morning and maybe DH will go out with the leaf blower and clear up round the front.
Some events in our lives leave lasting memories that never fade. This is one of them. Although it's fortynine years ago I still remember the evening I first met the man I would marry. Every gesture, every word that was spoken, every movement are all imprinted in my mind as if it were yesterday. A year after I graduated from High School in Sweden I got the chance to become an au-pair in London. There was an ad in the paper for a girl to help look after two children age 9 and 11 and do some light housework. I applied and to my surprise I got a positive answer from the mother. I'd sent photos of myself and explained that I’d just left school but she replied that as long as I could do the things that she needed done then she was willing to give me a trial period. So in August 1972 we packed my bags and I left Sweden by train and boat for London and the suburb of Pinner where I became au-pair to Penny and Michael and their two daughters Johanna and Sarah-Jane. My duties there were very easy. I had to make sure that the girls got up on time in the morning to get ready for school and make breakfast for them and their father. After that it was time to drive them to school picking up a couple of their friends on the way. When I got back I prepared breakfast for their mother and did a few small chores around the house. From around eleven thirty until it was time to collect the girls and their friends from school at around four in the afternoon I had free time. I had one day a week free. I'd been in England for two months when Inger another Swedish girl who had been with the family a couple of years earlier came to visit. They decided to have a party for her and invited some of the friends she had made when she was there. We'd gathered in the living room and someone had put a Rolling Stones record on. I was sitting on the couch when a young man came in. She took him round and introduced him to everyone and finally brought him over and introduced him to me as her boyfriend from the time she was in the family. My heart almost stopped beating, I got a big knot in my stomach and I really thought I was going to faint. It was him - Prince Charming. He was quite tall, slim with half long dark brown hair, dark eyes and a crooked smile. I didn't know what to say or do. I looked down and hoped he just thought that I was shy. I desperately needed a cigarette. I got the packet out of my bag, took a cigarette out and could only hope he didn't notice how my hand was shaking. Before I could do anything he offered me a light and asked if he could sit next to me. I just nodded dumbly accepted the light and took a couple of deep drags on the cigarette to try and calm my nerves. He sat down and looked at me closely while I smoked. Then he said the first words. "Would you like to dance?" I didn't know what to say or do. I stubbed out my cigarette and took another from the packet. He lit it for me. I took a couple of deep drags and said nervously "Yes I'd love to but I'm not a very good dancer." "That's OK, I'm a useless dancer too." he said "We can be useless dancers together." He took my hand in his squeezed it gently and helped me to my feet. I stubbed out my cigarette and we started to dance. When the music stopped we went back to the couch and sat down again. I lit another cigarette. We sat there on the couch and started to talk. He told me about himself, his family and that he'd just come home from working in Germany for a year and had started a new job at a a hotel not far from where I lived and how much he enjoyed his work. I just sat and listened, watched him and chainsmoked cigarette after cigarette. Then he paused and I heard that there was a Simon and Garfunkel record playing. He looked at me again. "The next track is Bridge Over Troubled Water, let's dance again.” I agreed and as I stood up he put his arm around me and led me to the middle of the floor. He turned to face me put his arms around me and drew me close. I put my hands on his shoulders and as Bridge Over Troubled Water played we swayed slowly from side to side. I laid my head against his chest. He bent his head forward and I felt his lips against my hair. I closed my eyes and held on tighter to him, I could hardly believe this was really happening. My heart was pounding as if it would burst and I was sure he could feel it against his chest. I felt his hands on my back and then they slowly moved downwards to just below my waist. I stiffened and said "No, please not there." "I'm sorry." He said and moved his hands upwards again. All too soon the dance ended and he took me back to my seat. We sat down and he put his arm around me and pulled me towards him. I rested my head on his shoulder and he took my hand in his. I still couldn't believe this was happening. He asked me to tell him all about myself and my family. I reached out and took another cigarette from the packet to calm my nerves and he lit it for me. I could barely stop my hand shaking. As I smoked I told him about where I was born and grew up, how we moved around, where we lived now and about my family. He asked me about my friends and what I was interested in. When I'd finished he asked me to dance again and I didn't hesitate. It was the most wonderful feeling being in his arms. He was so attentive all evening, lit my cigarettes, brought me plates of food and refilled my glass. I just sat with my head on his shoulder, his arm around me and my hand in his. I wished the evening would never end, but all too soon it was time to say goodnight. He was the last to leave. We stood up and walked to the front door. I hoped that it wouldn't end here and how it would hurt if I never saw him again. We got to the front door and suddenly he turned round and pulled me towards him. I almost lost my balance. He put his hand under my chin, tilted my head upwards and then he kissed me full on the lips. I almost fainted. I felt his tongue against my teeth, opened my mouth and our tongues met. After what seemed like an age he pulled away, looked at me, kissed me again and I felt his hand move round to my breast. My heart was pounding again and my legs had turned to jelly. It was by no means the first time I'd been kissed but I had never felt this way before. He took a step back and looked at me his hands on my shoulders. "Thank you for a wonderful evening, he said "I've enjoyed every minute. Please can I see you again?" My heart skipped a beat. "Oh yes, please I'd like that very much". I whispered back. "Wednesday is my free day". "Good", he said "I know the phone number, so I'll call you tomorrow. Thank you again for a wonderful evening". He kissed me again and then I watched as he walked down the driveway. Just before he disappeared round the corner he turned, blew me a kiss and waved. I waved back and then he was gone. Slowly I closed the door and turned round. Inger, the girl who the party was for was standing at the end of the hall watching me a smile on her face. "Oh my", she said (in Swedish of course) "Just look at you, I do believe you're in love. I think I know someone who's going to be spending an awful lot of time here." I felt my cheeks burning. I walked down the hall and into the living room where we had been sitting just a short time before. We both lit cigarettes. "I don't know what you're talking about". I said and took several deep drags. She blew out a cloud of smoke and laughed. "I saw you both. He couldn't take his eyes off you and you sitting there all innocent and doe eyed as if butter wouldn't melt in your mouth. And what about those goodnight kisses? I thought you'd never come up for air." I blushed again stubbed out my cigarette and lit another to try and hide my embarrassment. "Was it that obvious?" She laughed through another cloud of cigarette smoke. "Obvious? You were glued to each other all evening like Siamese twins." I looked at her. "Inger I've never felt like this before”. She rolled her eyes. "Well now you do know but now we have to clear up this mess." We stubbed out our cigarettes and started to clean up. An hour later we were done and after a last cigarette together I made my way upstairs to my room. I sat on the bed undressed, slid under the covers, switched off the light and before I drifted off into sleep lay thinking about the evening and wondering how it would be when he phoned. And the rest as they say is history.....................................
DH is clearing out his walk in closet and found the album we made with all the cards and telegrams from our wedding. Lots of them had come unstuck so I spent a couple of hours glueing them back in, reading and reminiscing. There was even a letter from DH’s family doctor who gave us a teatray that we still use today almost 48 years later. So many happy memories of that day and so many of the wellwishers no longer with us. I’m going to make notes against each one so the kids will know who they all were.
Love the story of how you met, Bibbi. And notes in the wedding album are an excellent idea for your kids. My mother left behind a large box of photos, most of them unmarked so my sister and I have no idea who the subjects are.
@Beth Gallagher Thanks for the comments about how we met. I know what you mean about the photos. DH got a couple of albums from his mother but they went through the photos and wrote everything down. When she died he got another box of photos and he didn’t have a clue about most of them. Then by chance on Ancestry he got in contact with a for him unknown cousin of his mother. She had loads of the photos herself and helped him put names to many of them.
In exactly two weeks I have my appointment with the ocular surgeon to go through the exact procedures for the enucleation of my eye. One week later I will have the surgery to remove my blind and painful eye. It will be a relief in many ways.
I guess you're thinking of something like "phantom pain" that you can have in an amputated arm or leg. No, as far as I know that doesn't happen when an eye is removed, but watch this space
It's another rainy day so between trips onto the porch for my nicotine fixes I'm continuing with sorting out stuff to be kept, given away, recycled or trashed from DH's walk in closet. Our upstairs TV room is full of stuff from the closet so I can only get from the elevator to our bedroom and the computer room. I sit in there and he brings in things for me to sort out and I get to decide what stays and what goes - woohoo! All the Christmas decorations neatly packed for easy access - wow in two months Christmas will be over!! About 200 music cassettes that we can't play because we haven't had a cassette player for about fifteen years will be going to the recycling plant. You can get all the music online on Spotify or similar streaming services anyway. Ten cartons of 3.5" floppy discs, do we even have a slot for those on our old PC? Fifty VCR tapes with cartoons and kid's movies that you can also stream online plus family movies. We have a DVD/VCR player so we'll transfer the family movies. Then they all go to recycling. Wow, when all this stuff is cleared away I might be able to get into his closet again! This is turning into a marathon job but we'll save the kids a lot of time some day in the hopefully distant future.
Bibbi--I'm curious; how expensive are cigarettes in Sweden? Do they carry the social stigma that is prevalent in the USA? My husband is a smoker and I'd love for him to stop, but at his age (66), I suppose he's not giving them up.
@Beth Gallagher It varies between 6 and 8 USD for a pack of twenty and my Winston 100's are at the lower end of the price range. All the packs come with the usual health warnings and the number of smokers has decreased over the years, but it seems to be most popular among teenage girls and us oldies. I'm 69 and smoked regularly since I was 12 and like your husband don't see myself stopping.
Is there a lot of hysteria around "2nd hand smoke" and other no smoking campaigns there? Here in the states, smokers are social pariahs. It's surprising that I don't smoke; everyone in my family did except me... and I was raised on a tobacco farm.