A guy is sitting on his front porch early one morning, when a local government maintenance truck pulls up. Two women exit, pull out their shovels, and get right to work. One woman digs a hole at the side of the road, walks up the sidewalk about 10 feet, starts to dig another, while her companion comes behind her and fills in the first hole. All morning long they do this, working their way up the street…one digs a hole, goes and starts another one some feet away, while her workmate comes behind filling them in. At midday they change sides of the street and work their way back doing the same thing, never taking a break…dig a hole/fill it in, dig a hole/fill it in. At the end of the day as they're packing up, the guy’s curiosity gets the better of him. So he walks up and says “Pardon me, ladies. First off, I would like to commend the two of you on your work ethic. You have been at it all day long, out here in the hot sun, never taking a break. I don’t know that I have seen two people who work harder than you two, much less government workers. But I gotta ask…what the heck are you doing?” One of the workers says “Yeh, I can understand how it might look a bit strange. But you see, the woman who plants the trees called in sick today.”
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother in law to the airport! I tell ya, I don't get no respect...
An elderly couple were concerned about their faltering memories, so they made an appointment with their doctor. After the examination, he sits them down in his office. “You two are fine. We all get a little forgetful as we age. I tell you what I do…I write things down when I really need to remember them. Often the mere act of writing things down is sufficient to help me remember.” Relieved, they go home. Later that evening they’re watching TV, and the husband gets up to go to the kitchen. “Where are you going?” asks his wife. He replies “I thought I get me a dish of ice cream.” “That sounds good. Could you get me one?” "Sure, hon. I can do that. One dish of ice cream, coming up.” ”Aren’t you going to write that down?” she asks. “You know what the doctor said.” “No, I don’t think I need to do that. It’s just a bowl of ice cream.” He turns to go to the kitchen and she says “You know, I think I’d like some hot fudge on that.” “Okay, dear. One bowl of ice cream with hot fudge, coming right up!” “Well, don’t you think you should write that down?” Mildly perturbed, he replies “There’s no need to do that. It’s not that much to recall. I’ll be right back.” He turns again to go to the kitchen and she says “Could you put some nuts on that for me?” “Yeh, I can do that. I think we have some in there. Not a problem.” “I know you better write that down! That’s a lot to remember!” More than slightly annoyed, he says “Look! My memory’s not that bad! Ice cream, fudge and nuts! Jeez.” He turns again to go to the kitchen and she says “I think there’s some whipped cream in the fridge…” “Sure, why not. I’ll throw some on top for you.” “Here’s a pen! Write it down!!” Angrily, he yells “Get off my back, woman!! Ice cream with fudge, nuts and whipped cream!! It’s not rocket science!!!!” So he stomps off into the kitchen and is in there for half an hour. He finally comes back and puts a plate of bacon & eggs in front of her. She looks at the plate, looks at him, looks back at the plate, and says “You forgot my toast!”