Just For Laughs

Discussion in 'Make Me Laugh' started by Allie Seay, Mar 29, 2015.

  1. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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  2. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    I know I'm going to feel stupid when someone explains it but I don't get this one. Who is saying 'What in the hell is that?" - Grandma? What is she looking at? Who is saying "How did I get here?" - another person besides Grandma?
     
    #647
  3. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    [​IMG]
    Christian Nationalism Explained


    Christian Nationalism is a Satanic movement in which Christians love America and vote for Republicans. It is literally the evilest thing that has ever existed in this country, and the gravest danger the American church has ever faced. It is important to stop this wicked, depraved, idolatrous movement before they organize another insurrection — or worse, elect a Republican.

    Origins: One day Trump had a meeting with Satan in his underground lair and concocted a diabolical plan to trick Christians into voting for him by banning abortion and helping all the people find jobs. Thus, Christian Nationalism was born, and millions of so-called Christians voted for Trump — even though he's a sinner. Despicable!

    (from The Babylon Bee)
     
    #648
  4. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    FBI Reveals Items Seized From Mara-Lago
     
    #649
  5. Tony Page

    Tony Page Veteran Member
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  6. Nancy Hart

    Nancy Hart Supreme Member
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  7. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    #652
  8. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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  9. Tony Page

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    FaVnUbxUsAAF5f1.jpg
     

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    #654
  10. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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  11. Kate Ellery

    Kate Ellery Supreme Member
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    Ask I kid …..




    1. How Do You Decide Who To Marry?You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. Allan, age 10
    No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all the way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with. Kristen, age 10

    2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.Camille, age 10

    3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.Derrick, age 8

    4.WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?Both don't want any more kids. Lori, age 8

    5.WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other.Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. Lynnette, age 8(isn't she a treasure?)
    On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date. Martin, age 10

    6.WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?When they're rich. Pam, age 7 (Love her)
    The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. Curt, age 7
    The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. Howard, age 8

    7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. Anita, age 9 (bless you child)
    8.HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED? There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? Kelvin, age 8

    And the #1 Favourite is...
    9. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

    Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck. Ricky, age 9
     
    #656
  12. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    The sign over the main gate at some German concentration camps read Arbeit Macht Frei (Work makes you free).
    There was fine print below those big letters.
    Es sei denn, Sie sind hier. (unless, of course, you're in here.)
    proxy-image.jpg
     
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  13. Dwight Ward

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    #658
    Shirley Martin and John Brunner like this.
  14. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    #659
    Shirley Martin and Dwight Ward like this.
  15. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    I admit it. I'm a miner attracted person. When I see a bunch of guys getting into those elevators ready to go down and load tons of coal, it excites me something awful. I have to avoid the state of West Virginia entirely.
    To distract myself from these impure thoughts I ride my bike. You could say I'm a pedalphile.
     
    #660

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