It seems that the older I get, the harder it is for me to take things in stride. Things that normally wouldn't be a ripple on the pond seem somehow insurmountable to me. I have anxiety over the dumbest things. I know part of it is that I don't have the physical abilities that I used to, so I have to ask for help with things... and I'm one who does not like to ask for help. I am also a control freak and it seems that so many things are beyond my control now. For instance, I got a notice from a credit monitoring service that my SS# was included in YET ANOTHER data breach and has been found on the "dark web." I'm supposed to put a fraud alert on my Experian credit report. We have our credit frozen on all the major credit bureaus but somehow that is not enough. I also need to contact the SS Admin. Well... why don't they already know that my SS# was part of that breach and pro-actively take steps to protect me? SO FRUSTRATING to have something else to worry about. These damn hackers need to be lined up and shot for disrupting people's lives. And then stabbed just because. And set on fire. Canceling an appointment at MD Anderson this month has caused a kerfuffle and somehow my scan appointments for next May were also canceled. When I tried to get that straightened out, they scheduled the scans for December (next month) instead of next May. Argh. I need to calm down before I try to get that straightened out... again. Does anyone understand English anymore?? Maybe I need to use "text speak" and say things like "I C ur gtng my appt wrng." Tomorrow I need to take my car to the dealership for them to address a noise in the HVAC actuators. When I adjust the temp up or down, there is a squeak in the vents. I received a call from GM customer support about this; apparently some kind of HVAC "box" needs to be replaced which means they will drop the dashboard. I am already worrying that they won't get it back together right and I'll have a nightmare of dealer visits in the coming months. Gotta get that worrying done in advance, doncha know? I hope I don't have to be "that customer" in the service department. (Though it won't be the first time.) All this to say... I just seem to be so emotionally fragile or something. The least little thing sets me off and I know it's not doing my blood pressure any favors. I know most of this is due to my age. I just never used to "fret" over things like this. I want to be old and just sit in a chair with a good book, ya know??
I wish I had some Xanax. Maybe I'll ask my doctor if they ever get my appointments straightened out. (I had to give up beer because of gout; I may rethink this.)
Beth, I go through the same kinds of things, and it is getting harder to overlook it and move on. Hope you get to feeling better. Last couple days I haven't felt good either. Maybe something i the air,lol.
Totally relate to that, the new me; I don't know yet, feelings as we aged. Use to be that xmas's feeling, I've had this last week would've made me feel good, but instead raised BP and made me feel bad. Still happy, but had to be sure to stay on BP meds, and tell myself; "calm down" deep breathing, stuff like that. Anyway; I've been feeling like that for awhile now, the way you're describing what you're going through. I just figured it's part of our ageing process, not sure. Hang in there Beth; "think"; this too shall pass.
Anxiety and stress my wife and I know all too well. My prostate problem/problems, my upcoming biopsy, if I'm going need radiation treatments, if I'm going to wind up in a hospital, worrying about my wife driving home at night from the hospital, not knowing if we will be able to enjoy a few of the events of the NFR in Vegas in December, wanting to move up north by next June, trying to sell our boat/trailer and the SIL coming out here in December, we have way too much anxiety/stress. If I wind up in a hospital, my wife will have to take care of things at home that she normally has me take care of. And, on top of all of this, she can get plenty of anxiety/stress from her job at home. Neither of us know just how long she will be able to keep her job, depending on my health. IOW, we both know why folks in their mid 70's are retired. Her job was a whole lot easier for her when she first started.
Pray, that things work out for you and your wife, Cody, seems like when it rains it pours; "doesn't it". When Marie and I, have one of us placed in hospital, the other will stay over at hosp. at night, mostly. When it was her, I would come back home during the day sometimes, to feed animals, then go back to the hospital. Can't believe you still have the boat. Or, you want to "move again". We've been here longer than we've been anywhere; and I still don't want to move. Always hated or dreaded moving, "myself". It's a shame; we don't see the "overwhelming" things, beforehand so we are prepared.
When will you have the biopsy, Cody? I assume the MRI showed something of concern? Hang in there. For most cancer treatments you are not hospitalized unless it's a surgery. Treatments are out-patient for the most part. As for the boat, just price it right and someone will buy it. We priced our RV dirt cheap (of course we were selling to a relative), but we were so glad to get rid of it. As for the SIL, firmly advise her that you have too much going on right now and can't entertain visitors. Period.
@Beth Gallagher and all on line friends here, as you can see and read, we all suffer with this frame of mind. The anxiety. of the the next moment.It comes and goes, and varies in how deep we feel-or not at the time. I had to stop and delete, as I get long winded and think I have answers - and I do not. But do know you are not alone in your feelings of being overwhelmed, and anxiety. Day to day living becomes harder, more expensive, shorter, and at times you settle with that,other times, seems unbearable. We all have here to come to, with people who do care, that understand how you feel. People who can relate and least try to understand.
This is exactly why many of us feel comfortable sharing our woes on SoC. No one is harsh or critical, or says "pull yourself together," "snap out of it," or any of that condescending stuff. Misery actually does love company it seems. To use a Millennial expression, I think many of us are tired of "adulting" and just want some calm in our golden years.
A large part of this issue for me is that--like the rest of us--I'm used to doing whatever needed to be done in my life, whether that meant earning income or effecting repairs around the house or any other life issue. I no longer have the stamina that I used to have, and I got all the retired time in the world to dwell on it. Then there's the emotional side that takes the edge off of motivation. Except for this damned bladder issue, at least I got my health. Today I helped my neighbor drag a huge tarp from across his property, tied some ropes to it, and pulled it over the damaged roof of his shed with my tractor to tide him over through the winter. (Harry is the long-term scoutmaster I've mentioned.) He's a year older than I, needs to lose weight, and had knee surgery that made things "not as bad." Harry would get up on the ladder to secure the tarp and then have to gather himself before he could climb down (this is just a few rungs up on a step ladder.) He was too stubborn to let me do it all. As I was telling Harry today, I guess I would rather deal with the loss of ability to "do stuff" and to be independent than to never have experienced doing those things or being that way in the first place.
"As I was telling Harry today, I guess I would rather deal with the loss of ability to "do stuff" and to be independent than to never have experienced doing those things or being that way in the first place." Amen to that @John Brunner !!
i used to take my frustrations out by doing physical stuff. No humans were injured. Now that stuff is mostly out. I sat around waiting for my leg to get better for years and let atrophy move in. Fortunately I am mean enough that when I call the kids, they come. I take comfort in watching Troy Black videos, Dr Berg...The internet is helpful for many things. Some things I let go cuz I don't wanna. If I stay mean, I am able to still do a lot. Lawn tractors help.
Since my wife still works, 7:30AM to 4PM Monday thru Friday, she really can't stay with me overnight. The hospital I was in in Colorado, its visiting hours didn't include overnight stays. The one I might end up in here does have that, but since she'd have to work the next day, I don't know if she would or not. We put our boat/trailer on Boat Trader this last summer, but due to over 100 degree heat, simply couldn't show it, even on weekends. We've already taken it off of Boat Trader. Without a doubt, we will have to lower the price on it and (almost) give it away. Really seems that people here want a much newer boat/trailer than what we have. Even when I tell folks on the ad that the Engine Hours are only 32, the interest just doesn't seem to be there very much. Don't want to have it transported to the Reno/Sparks area, but "gotta do what we gotta do". As for moving again, we really have no choice. Even if a person does a lot of investigating about a certain area, they really don't know what the area is like, weather/vehicle insurance, until they live there. Both are very, very high here. Can be 110 degrees during the summer and car insurance is "out of this world". Northwestern Nevada has much, much better weather in the summer, with 4-seasons.