I'm an 88 year-old resident of an assisted living facility in New York City. Before I made the decision to leave my own home, I did a lot of research on what it would be like to live in such a facility from a resident's perspective. I found nothing. Having now experienced two very different residences, I've written a book on the subject: Assisted Living: An Insider's View. I also maintain a blog on the subject, which I invite you to visit. http://www.assistedlivingresident.net In addition to my regular posts, you'll also find excerpts from my book and links to vendors. Thanks for your attention. Carol Netzer
Welcome to the forum. As a discussion forum, we're all about conversation here. If someone here has written a book, a link to where it can be bought is fine, and when they have a web site, they can add a link to it in their signature but I think I'm speaking for most of the members here when I say that we'd rather not have a lot of promotional stuff. I know that I'd like to keep the forum as a place where people fifty and older can talk about things that interest them, and not so much about selling stuff.
@Carol Netzer it's admirable of you to write that book. Pardon me for citing your age because I really like people who are productive whether they are old or young. I am not a writer and I have no ambition that's why I salute those people who spend time to write for the benefit of readers. My mother is 81 and wheelbound. She cannot speak due to the stroke that hit her 5 years ago. Half of her body is paralyzed and only the caregivers keep her alive and well - feeding, bathing, changing clothes, etc. It would have been great if she was productive like you. Right now, she is like a vegetable that we have to maintain otherwise she will wither and die.
I'm seeing/visiting with a beautiful lady, 88 years old, at a hostel home. She's a clever little lady of German decent. She has written books-- one of which I have had the honor working with her in editing and proofreading, and publishing. She wrote a song and is archived in one of the choral Christmas cantatas. She gave me her book of handwritten poetry and stories which I cherish and wish to publish one day. My friend is funny and I learn so much from her store of knowledge on writing, about life and hope, and her amazing history during the Third Reich. She's an amazingly inspiring woman! She just purchased a German typewriter!
Note: My post above - the first line should read WHEELCHAIRBOUND. Before my mother had a stroke, we had her committed to a nursing home. She was able-bodied and wanted to go anywhere, just roaming around for the whole day. When things were getting out of control - she would sometimes not come home for a number of days - my siblings and I decided to put her in the care of a nursing home. Don't be mistaken, my mother was a normal woman, she just had that wanderlust of roaming and cannot stay put in one place. It was really sad to put her in that place but we felt that she is safer there. When she suffered a stroke, we decided to bring her home because she couldn't walk anymore. Her condition turned for the worse before she got out of the hospital - more than a week of confinement. She had lost her speech power and half of her body is immobile. She is in that same condition until now.
My father suffered a thrombosis that eventually left him unable to walk, but I remember how the doctor urged me to take my father out of the hospital as soon as possible. He was convinced that a long stay is harmful for patients because, from his observation, there are "evil things" floating in the hospital environment looking to stick to the patients in there. Strange for a doctor this kind of statement, but this is exactly what he said. While I think to have taken my father on time to avoid further progression of whatever tied him up to bed, he later began to say incoherent things, kind of twisted prayers or something similar. Thrombosis however was not fulminating and he was diagnosed with 90% of possibilities to recover a normal life, but such thing never happened, despite he had a friend who suffered a sever stroke and did not only rehabilitated, but used to try to cheer up my father. Reading what your mother is passing through, made me evoke irremediably what happened to my father, and makes me wonder if it could be true that sometimes that condition in which patients cannot longer walk could not be associated for real with those "evil things" the doctor cited. After my father left the hospital, he was able to walk, but from one day to another, we couldn't do it anymore no matter how much he tried nor the therapies he received.