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Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Cody Fousnaugh, Jan 30, 2017.
Yep! Like no other since he was in high school.
Sounds like a good thing in my opinion.
One thing we've found out........he has never lost his love for her and visa/versa.
Just to give another Update here:
Things seem to be going fine with BIL and his old girlfriend. One thing he sure wasn't use to was the snow that has hit the area a couple of times since he's been with her.
Appears he's getting bored sitting at home while she is at her daughter's babysitting her grandson. He went to a Job Fair this week, applied at a couple of places, but..........no word yet. We think his problem will be the VERY lack of computer skills. He didn't like using the computer at his last job and definitely is a "hunt and peck" type person on the keyboard. Today, "hunt and peck" just doesn't cut it for using a computer for a job.
And, he told me that she wants him to get a hearing test. Looks as if she is saying things to him and he keeps saying "what did you say?" to her.
She does let him drink his beer while watching NASCAR, that she absolutely has no interest in. Now, if she would only let him drink his Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum, he'd be even more happy.
''Hunt and Peck'' I've not heard of that phrase before, but it's very apt for those who type with one finger..lol... Unfortunately these days almost everyone, even labouring jobs , warehouse pickers, and shop workers have to have a basic knowledge of computers. is there no chance of him finding work driving or something where he wouldn't necessarily need computer skills?
Possibly his age, 67 and lack of experience could be hindering him in finding a job. The old OJT aka "on the job training", doesn't exist nearly as much today as it did years ago. Don't really know what kind of problem, or problems, he's having finding a part-time job, but if he applying places and not getting any calls for interviews, something is definitely wrong.
I can't imagine looking for a job at 67, but the last time I actually had to look for a job was in the 1970s, and that didn't take very long. Pretty much, one job just led to offers for another, but I can't imagine that happening at 67, other than online.
I totally agree @Ken Anderson , trying to find a job at 67 although possible, has got to be very difficult... There's masses of people with degrees and years of experience , unemployed having been made redundant , who are pushing supermarket trolleys and other menial jobs simply because there's nothing else available to them, shockingly..
years ago people who retired had lots of opportunities if they so chose, to take on a little part-time job after retirement to supplement their income...but these days are very different.. So many of those little part-time jobs are now filled by volunteers..
Actually, not at Home Depot or Lowe's. We talked to an older guy who was a retired computer tech and working on the floor at Home Depot. We have noticed some other "older" employee's at Home Depot as well as Lowe's. There are also a number of older, and retired, cashiers at Walmart. Talked to one on Saturday.
Sometimes I think it just can depend on where a person lives. Where we are looking to move, Loveland, Colorado, the population is a little more of retired Seniors rather than young folks. Loveland isn't like Denver and it's metro area, where many, many more of the nicer/high paying jobs are that the younger generation is looking for.
At age 68, my wife had a new job within a month of getting laid-off from her previous job where she had worked for 5 years. Of course, 5 years at a job today is a long time, compared to 5 years on-the-job years ago when 10 years and up was a long time. With her experience and college degree's, even though the degree's were almost 20 years old, she got a salary high that she even requested. We were both stunned, but happy.
A lot old jobs are filled by seniors because the younger generation will turn them down because of the pay or duties, etc. Seniors are more willing to take them just to be busy.
Talked to him the other night and got a real surprise..........he's going to church on Easter morning with the lady and her family. To us, really shocking. He told me that the last time he went to church was more than 20 years ago.
He can no longer watch NASCAR racing, because they don't get FOX Sports network anymore. We told him to get it and pay for it with his money, if she doesn't want to watch the races. He changed the subject. She will let him have a Miller Lite sometimes, but absolutely no Captain Morgan Spiced Rum. She babysits her grandson Mon thru Friday at her daughters house, but he doesn't go. Really sounds like he's getting pretty bored at home by himself.
Still, wish him the Best of Luck, but seriously doubt this move to her place is exactly what he wanted to be, now.
They do have a few Nascar races on the regular FOX channel but to many of the races have moved to "pay to watch them" channels....and my Honey and I don't think forking out the money to get those channels are worth it. In our case we could go watch the races at any of my daughters' homes since they all do have all the paid for Channels and a TV in every room almost. But with all the changes Nascar has been making and so many of our favorite Drivers retiring...we are weaning ourselves from Nascar and finding it is not bothering us at all.
As for your BIL going to Church on Easter...he may just find he enjoys himself. Maybe he is finding that making some changes and trying some new things is worth the benefits he is reaping.
Even though we can still watch NASCAR races, we don't. We use to record the race and play back later, running thru the commercials, but, just like yourself, we just aren't as interested as we use to be. Just like professional rodeo, most of our favorite cowboys and cowgirls have now retired, but we are really looking forward to going to Cheyenne, Wyoming for their rodeo.
Yes, we really hope church will catch on with him. Although, when my dad took my mom and I to the early service on Sunday morning, during the sermon he'd fall asleep. My mom would have to nudge him a little to wake him up. I could see this, because I was the one to pass out the Church Bulletin and turn on and off the sanctuary lights when the minister went up to the pulpit for the sermon. I really think my dad would not have ever entered a church if it weren't for my mom. These were Legal Guardians of mine, but I did call them "mom" and "dad".
Well, after talking to BIL yesterday, him and hers relationship has taken a turn for the worse. Apparently they had some kind of argument 6 weeks ago and she told him he needs to move out. He did go to church with her and her family on Easter Sunday, but apparently that didn't work out very well either.
He told me "40 years is just too long (to make things work again like when they were teen's).
He has got "where to live" options, but we aren't one of them. We are making plans on leaving Florida. Both of us, and SIL, would really like to see things work out between them, but don't know.
He is still moving out of the lady's place........nothing has changed, or will change that, he has told me. Last week when I called him, he was doing his laundry at a laundramat. He told me that she used to take his laundry, with hers, to her daughters house to do. There is no washer/dryer where she lives. She would do his and hers while babysitting her grandson. She won't do it now and told him where the nearest laundromat is and that's where he was.
He got a P.O. Box at the Post Office near where his last apartment was, in southern Florida, and will have his mail forwarded to it starting the end of this month.
He has contacted the owner of the company he last worked for and the owner will hire him back, but he still has to find somewhere to live down there.
We'd hoped it would work between them, but there are just too many differences in the way they live. So, he will say "goodbye" to Louisiana and the cold temps and some snow they got and head back to south Florida. One thing for sure, he didn't like the cold temps and snow that happened there.
Well, I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out for your B-I - L... . you said it wouldn't didn't you?
However, I'm pleased he's got his old job back, the chances of that happening these days are slim to none so he's very lucky, hopefully he'll find himself a new place to live soon..
is he upset about having to leave?
I asked him if he was upset and he said “absolutely not”. I think he really wants his old life back of not being told “you can’t do that”.
Highly doubt he’ll even keep in touch with her.
Oh well it's been a learning curve for him ...
It makes me sad to hear their relationship did not work out, but at the same time I hope they both feel better knowing that the "unfinished business" between them....is finally finished.
He's on his way back to southern Florida, aka Coral Springs on the Eastern side. He's getting his job back with his previous boss and has to be back in Coral Springs tomorrow (Thursday).
When I asked him if they would ever see each other again, he said "maybe" with a number of question marks.
They have two very different lifestyles and he is looking forward to getting back to his old one. He will be able to watch NASCAR again and have his Miller Lite and Captain Morgan Spiced Rum. I'm sure he'll miss her cooking and her daughters, but he took care of himself for many years before she contacted him last year. He really had no choice but to return to Florida in order to work again. We, wife and I, do know one thing, he sure hated the snow, even though there was very little, and the cold that hits up there in the winter. It had been literally years upon years since he'd been in the type of weather.
But, like us, he wanted his old lifestyle back. That's the reason we are moving to either northern Colorado or southeastern Wyoming.
Yea, he went and now back in Florida. They only got along for about 6 months and she told him he had to leave her place. He called his old boss in Florida, told him what had happened and the boss told him "come home". So, he left Louisiana and is now back in south Florida.
He told me over the phone, "42 years is just too long to be apart and then think everything will work out. We have very different lifestyles."
I was contacted by my ex fiancé 48 years after I caught her cheating on me and broke it off. To make matters worst, she cheated when I spending a year in wonderful Vietnam getting shot at. I watched all the WWII movies as a kid. Always wanted to join the Army and test my courage. I used to feel sorry for those poor soldiers who got Dear John letters and never thought that would one day be me.
I end up moving to the same State as my ex and close by to her. She finds me on the internet and asked if she could call me. I said yes and we had an interesting conversation skipping the cheating part other than her saying she was young, immature and could not handle the worry that any day she may hear that I died. OK, she was just 17 when we got engaged and I get it. Plus it led to meeting and marrying my wonderful wife of 46 years. What was interesting was her story.
Briefly the guy she cheated with is out as gay now and we are Facebook friends since I thanked him for making it possible to meet my wife of 46 years. My ex fiancé lived in a commune, was stoned all the time, got pregnant and left the commune sleeping with different guys for a place to spend the night. She also was a drug addict and developed mental problems that made her bi-polar and hear voices. She claims her angel talks to her which I found curious for a Jewish girl. The sad part is that she does what her angel tells her even to the point of legally changing her name. She never became the famous lawyer that her mom said she would be and certainly was not above me as her mom said when we got engaged. She became a Masseuse and fortune teller using the information from her angel who apparently could tell the future of people over the phone.
I better wrap this up. With glee she told me that she married a guy for 20 years to support her son and then gave him divorce papers the day after his last college tuition check cleared. She had been cheating on him with a woman she is now married too. She is very liberal and anti capitalist even though she owns an online business. We would not have lasted long together so I viewed her cheating on me as the single greatest thing that happened in my wife. My wife who put up with 13 relocations for my business and me being away from home for up to 3 months a year both in the US and overseas, not to mention the long hours I worked. My wife up and left every job she had to allow me to further my career and is very grateful for the life I have provided her and the love I show her that she says sometimes is smothering to the point that she often asks why I married her. I saw her on a train and 3 weeks later we were engaged. She is tiny at 4' 11" and has a very good heart.
So after hearing all this she wanted to meet me for lunch. She had a box of everything I ever gave her for some reason. I think she felt guilty for what she did to me after all those years and realized how different her life would have been with me. Anyway I said no and asked her to mail me the box which she did. When she called to ask if I got the box she again wanted to meet me for lunch. I said no and asked her not to call me anymore. I did not think it would be a good idea to meet a women who I loved for 5 years and even a few more after we broke up to the point of yelling out her name when I was with a new girlfriend.
Since every girlfriend I had cheated with a friend of mine that she met through me, I do not think it is a good idea for men and women who have some sort of emotional feelings, even just friendship, to be together. A few drinks and inhibitions go away. Emotions lead to bad decisions. Why risk it and why the interest?
Now when my second ex girlfriend called me and wanted to get together, I told her no too. She told me her tale of drugs (crack), prostitution and a child she got from one of her Johns. Then she got clean and became a stripper where she met and married a rich client who she gave lap dances too. He was 22 years older than her. She was coming to my city to help her daughter get off of crack. I ended it there.
Holy Cow Vinny, sounds like you had a narrow escape.. and fortunate that you found your wonderful wife. Someone was looking out for you for sure!!