Do You Celebrate Valentines Day?

Discussion in 'Holidays & Traditions' started by Ruth Belena, Feb 10, 2015.

  1. Ruth Belena

    Ruth Belena Veteran Member
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    In my first year of marriage, 38 years ago, I sent my husband - who is now my ex-husband - a valentine card, only to be told that we don't need to do that any more, and we never celebrated or marked Valentine's day while we were married.

    Twenty years ago I started receiving Valentine cards from a new love, so I send him one every year after that, but we didn't celebrate the day in any other way - no gifts, flowers or dining out.

    I see all the Valentine ads and promotions and I'm glad I never became involved in any of that. It's nice to have a romantic date or receive an unexpected gift, but I don't think it can have the same impact if you feel as if you are pressured into doing it on a specific day.
     
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  2. Adam Fields

    Adam Fields Veteran Member
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    I think it can be a nice gesture. Certainly it is not a good thing if your partner expects expensive and extravagant gifts that you can't afford. I think the best way to go is to make something from the heart. It feels more personal to me.
     
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  3. Mal Campbell

    Mal Campbell Supreme Member
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    For our first Valentine's together, my husband decided to take me out for a nice dinner. Having never dined out on Valentine's Day before, he didn't realize that he needed to make reservations. So we went to this upscale restaurant in Annapolis (on the water) and were told it would be an hour wait. After about 2 hours, and still being told it would be another hour, we left. So we went to the next restaurant, not quite as nice but still on the water, and was told it would be another big wait. After the 4th or 5th (and 4-5 hours later) we decided to just go to Pizza Hut. It didn't matter how nice the restaurant was, as long as we were together.

    Anyway, it's about 10:00 pm when we finish eating and get the check. My husband pulls out his credit card, but Pizza Hut didn't take credit cards back then. He looks at me very sheepishly and whispers, "How much money do you have?". I pull out my wallet and have about $1.50. By this time we're both getting a little nervous, but he tells me he'll just run to the ATM and be right back. From across the restaurant, some well meaning diner yells, "Hey how much are short, I can give you a few bucks!" I was mortified. To make matters worse, he then leaves me in the restaurant while he drives to the nearest ATM - it takes him about 20 minutes, which was about 10 minutes after the restaurant was supposed to close!! Yikes. :eek:

    This is when I realized that my mother was right and you can't die from embarrassment. Needless to say, this was our first and last attempt to celebrate Valentine's by going out! Just give me a box of chocolates and we'll call it good.

    Of course, it makes for a good story now.
     
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  4. Pat Baker

    Pat Baker Supreme Member
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    Valentines day and Mothers day are the days you do not want to go out to breakfast or dinner. I worked as a server and loved working on Mothers Day, the tips were always good. When I have been in a relationship we just exchanged cards. Show me you care throughout the relationship not just on one day.
     
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  5. Susan Long

    Susan Long Veteran Member
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    I agree with you Pat, I enjoy sincerity and care throughout the year. It is important from my perspective not to make such a big deal of holiday gifts and responses.
     
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  6. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    We buy each other a nice card and send one online as well. I will generally buy her a cute small stuffed toy. One year I bought her Tweety Bird that says cute little "love/Valentine" things. Last year, I got her a stuffed toy tiger holding a heart that says "I'm Wild About You". She loves tigers.

    We are in our mid 60's, love being married (next year 15 years) and love each other.
     
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  7. Corie Henson

    Corie Henson Veteran Member
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    Even before we got married, my husband had convinced me not to observe Valentine's day. He said that Valentine's day is rooted on commercialism because all the commercial establishments have their own promo and activities for that day in order to attract people to eat in restaurants and to buy gifts. Our policy regarding Valentine's Day is that we can make everyday a Valentine's Day. What's more important is to understand each other's shortcoming than giving a gift once a year. However, we believe in celebrating anniversaries particularly the golden wedding anniversary celebration.
     
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  8. Jenn Windey

    Jenn Windey Supreme Member
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    I don't celebrate Valentines Day. It is the day after that I celebrate because that is the day that all the chocolates go on half price sale. Now that is cause for celebration!

    When I was first divorced Valentines Day was one of those days that was hard for me. I am a hopeless romantic for the most part. With time though I just got so I thought of it as another money grab designed to make couples feel guilty if they did not share the day. I am all about the romance, and maybe sometimes in a busy world young couples need to have a special day to celebrate. It might be the only excuse they have to have a date night, raising families takes work. What's wrong with a day when people don't think twice about you going out. Plus it breaks up the time from the Holidays till spring. For that reason I think it is a lovely concept, and as I said chocolate...need I say more? :rolleyes:
     
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  9. Carlota Clemens

    Carlota Clemens Veteran Member
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    Valentine's Day was the most cherished celebration I waited for throughout my teen years, and also the saddest because I had no friend nor boyfriend for most part of this stage of my life.

    However if I had to thank St. Valentin for something is precisely for such a fact; not having to whom celebrated the date pushed me to run away from my classmates to avoid having them teasing me, and by escaping off the social setting they were, I found myself, discovering the loneliness can also be great, and sometimes greater than being in company.

    Nowadays I have a few friends with whom I may have dinner on St. Valentin's (and St. Patty's too) but I don't really celebrate it from a consumerism approach.
     
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  10. Tom Locke

    Tom Locke Veteran Member
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    There seems to be an awful lot of mystery about St Valentine and who he was; it is possible that he is an amalgamation of more than one person. He (or they) appears to have been a priest in Rome during the reign of Claudius. There are, in all, around a dozen St Valentines and this one (or two) is, among other things, the patron saint of beekeepers.

    As for Valentine's Day, there was no romantic connotation to it until Chaucer linked a tradition of courtly love to February 14th with a representation of the day that birds come together to find a mate.

    “For this was sent on Seynt Valentyne’s day / Whan every foul cometh ther to choose his mate.”
     
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  11. Lara Moss

    Lara Moss Supreme Member
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    If it was Annapolis on the water, as soon as the restaurant said "an hour wait", I would have gone to the local beachside market, bought some cheese, french baguette, fruit, and a bottle of wine…headed for the beach and enjoyed the sunset with my man :)
     
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  12. Krissttina Isobe

    Krissttina Isobe Veteran Member
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    :oops:Even if I don't have a special someone for that year I celebrate Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day is for your loved ones as well as the special one you love. I guess I'm a romantic and love the idea of having Valentine's Day every month too. I like the idea of Valentine's Day being every month so the relationship stays fresh and ever growing.
     
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