This is a dream that happened many years ago, when Robin (my most beloved and only daughter) was maybe a year or so old. It happened every night , and was so terrible that I hated to even go to bed at night, knowing I would have the nightmare when I fell asleep. Each night, I would dream that Robin died, and I was trying to save her. It was always a different dream; but the same theme , over and over. Sometimes, I died , too; other times, I would wake up shaking still trying to rescue her. One that I remember (to give you an example) is that she and I were on a raft with a mast, out in the ocean and in a terrible storm. The huge waves were pushing the raft all around and close to tipping it over. I had my arms around Robin, and a death grip on the wooden mast to keep us from being blown off of the raft. Then, a wave came that was so big and so strong, it literally tore Robin out of my arms and threw us both into the ocean. The last thing I remember before I woke up shaking and crying was that she was being carried away from me and deeper into the ocean, and I was swimming as hard as I could to reach her before she disappeared into the dark completely. Eventually, the dreams went away. Maybe because we moved somewhere else, I do not remember any more. Ever since then, I have been afraid that it meant that Robin would die in some terrible way and I would be unable to save her. Even though she is now in her mid-forties; I have lived with this fear all of these years. Any ideas, Jenn ? Or anyone who has thoughts about this nightmare.....
I don't know very much about dreams, Yvonne, but all I can speculate with is that perhaps at that time you were going through hard times. I think that when all of us were in our late twenties or early thirties we had unfounded fears.
Yvonne, I'm not very good at interpreting someone else's dreams but I would say that the deeper fear you were experiencing was of the loss of some aspect of self, of control over it, or likewise, of some aspect of your life having more to do with yourself than with Robin. The fact that you took it to be premonitory and without symbolism is not unusual. I don't know why but we tend to focus on dreams that cause undue fear more closely than the dreams that are joyful. We take our fears very seriously. Over the years, though I certainly don't shun my joyful dreams, I've found that the dreams that produce fear are often the most personally insightful and helpful towards emotional and spiritual growth. The trick is to teach yourself to remain asleep and in the dream thereby facing your fears, which also requires being able to recognize that you are in fact dreaming. It's not as hard as it sounds, being that when you are fearful in dreams you are very much in a state of heightened awareness anyway. Inevitably, if you can just reach that place of awareness wherein you realize you are dreaming you can take control of the situation, look fear in the eyes and tell it that you recognize it for what it is--unreal. It is a good stepping off place in learning control in what some call astral projection. I've done astral projection for most of my life, and facing fears in dreams taught me control in that realm. What exactly astral projection is I have never really determined, but that I do it I know. Premonition does exist both in waking and in sleeping, but I think it tends to have qualities that differ from dreams. Since you've not experienced those dreams in many years I am rather surprised that you would still fear for Robin. At least, I am surprised that your fears would be any more than any other mother would have for her child, grown or otherwise.
Dream Guru hahah I like that! I might have to start a real column for that... Anyway @Yvonne Smith sorry for such a delay in seeing this, I have had a nice bout of bronchitis which has taken me down more then I have been in years. I too, used to have terrible nightmares about my son and god son dying, it was what started me on the initial road of trying to understand dreams and what they mean. I don't know to much about you @Yvonne Smith or your family, so i will be somewhat general, I think it possible that Robin (although I just typed Rose?) was your first or perhaps only daughter, at the time, things might have been very unstable in your life. Sometimes this happens when we have children young and are not sure of our own places in the adult world, sometimes we have to leave a steady employment because of having a young child. in both cases there is an uncertainty involved. You are telling me in one dream how you were literally clinking to the mast of a raft, symbol wise this is very blatant, a mast is what carries a ship, in your case a raft, which is usually constructed by various timbers strung together. the question to ask yourself is if at the time, were you in a situation where you had so little you felt you needed to hang on with dear life to something (a mast? marriage maybe?? terrible job to keep food in the pot??) for fear of losing it all in the storm? Sounds like maybe things were a bit rough in those days. Perhaps at times you felt adrift and like the only person trying and binding that could hold on during the storms. Now death and rebirth is very sacred, and actually pretty scary in a dream. Your fear of your daughter dying is about the way you were coping with her growing up. It does indeed happen so fast doesn't it? One day they are in our arms and the next day they are off on their trike to the prom. Or so it feels. death is usually about an end of a phase, a change in circumstance and a coming of age. You died too- so you changed. But like a phoenix from the ashes I can assure you great things can arise. As a mother I understand how hard it is to let our children go, we hold on so tight, as if for dear life, because after all it is their life we have sworn to protect. Sometimes we shield them from the storms as we cling to the raft you see? Sometimes they change and become so different we wonder where our baby went, did they die? As a mother my biggest fear is my son having to bury me, that is eclipsed only by the fear of me ever having to bury him. So deep those bonds to our children, a feeling I think only a mother can grasp. I do not think those nightmares meant that she will die young, I think at that point in history you had some life things going on that were stressful and dealing with caring for a child made you fearful. Things seemed like they were changing and tumultuous.
Thank you, Guru Jenn. It is true that this was happening at a terribly difficult time, and in an already crazy life. My (first) husband had started doing heavy drugs, all the money went on that, and we had been living with lights and phone turned off, being evicted; stuff like that. I barely was able to buy food, and even that was mostly day-old bread. My daughter, Robin, was the shining sun in an otherwise terrible storm of my life. So, looking at what you, Allie, and Richard all had to say; I guess that it is long overdue for me to stop worrying when that dream might become a reality, and realize that it was not a prediction, just a reflection of my overwhelming fears at the time. Thank you, to all three of you......
@Yvonne Smith Happy I helped a little bit. Last night I had a crazy dream. I was with a very close friend of about five years (never met, only via internet). We had already passed on and were in a very nice resort just talking. All of a sudden, the place had a cabaret show but it consisted of passing around a microphone and singing a song. When she took the mike, she turned into a beautiful 20 years old girl and sang a Buffy St. Marie song from the 60's! Now, this one I am not even going to try to figure out, but I did enjoy it!