There have been a number of posts by members telling stories about family or friends that live or have lived in AL. but it would be interesting to hear from members that have actually toured one and what they learned.
My grandmother on my stepmother’s side owned one and my great aunt died in one so yeah, I’ve toured one and learned that I do not want to be in a position to have to live in one.
I have visited the one my mother and step father were in, starting in the independent living section, then to the assisted living section, and finally to the memory care unit, where my mother still resides. Like @Bobby Cole I don't want to ever be in that circumstance.
You write, “when” like it’s inevitable. Just about all of us are going to lose a little memory but that doesn’t justify having to run around looking for someone to take care of me. IF and that’s a HUGE IF, something starts to go haywire then I’ll make whatever arrangements I need to make. Some things are preferable and some things are not and being in an old folks home waiting to dance my last dance isn’t one of those preferable things.
IF my memory starts to become an issue, I'll seek out alternatives. Dr. Kevorkian, Dr. Glock, et al. But in general my family history argues against the men folk living long enough to deal with memory issues.
LOL! Good Point! If I live 3 more years I will be setting a record for the men in my direct family tree. And may I mention also that not one of them died in an assisted living home. Maybe it’s just that I love going to the gym and whilst training, I can watch and talk to younger people who are still trying to make their mark. I can also talk to and watch older folks and some older than myself who are out there working out and staying healthy in order to maintain a good quality of life. My goodness, I know a 90+ year old lady who lives on her own and the only thing she complains about is not having a husband to cook for any longer.
I could have written this, except I may be underestimating my survival instinct when speaking in the hypothetical. I turned 67 last summer. -My father died at 55 -My older brother died at 53 -My younger brother died at 60 (just weeks after that birthday) So here I am going to doctors for what thankfully ends up being nothing-burgers, explaining to them that I have no idea what to expect as a man of my age with my genetics...I am the first. When I get an opportunity for a test, I grab it...these things are the only data I got.
Regarding the original question: My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and then later dementia. I've told the story before, so I'll just summarize here. After being in the hospital, they transferred her to a very well-known Memory Care Unit outside of DC. My sister spent some time there keeping our mother company, when an orderly came in, walked up to my mother's roommate, and said "Time for your medication, Mrs. Brunner." In other words, the humans that were being warehoused in this well-known expensive place were being given the wrong meds with some degree of regularity. And who's to know? They cannot speak for themselves, they have no idea what's going on, and you can't tell if they are not acting normally because they are in the place specifically because they cannot act normally. It's the stuff of paranoid nightmares. Where's Chief Bromden when you need him?
Not everyone’s memory “goes south” as you say, @Lon Tanner . Some people do need a care facility because of memory loss, and some because of physical issues; but not everyone ends up that way. My mom and dad were both running a 3-story hotel into their 80’s, (when they passed away) and my mom had rental properties as well; and neither of them had memory problems, and actually, not a lot of physical problems. My Grandfather was into his 90’s when he had a heart attack and died, and he was also mobile and cognizant of everything right up until he passed away. He had a piano in his room (he had been a musician and piano tuner in his younger days, among other things), and he enjoyed playing the piano, and had a good memory for the old songs that he played and sang along with.
My daughter from Chicago is out to visit me, and to help with restoring my previous feeling of maintaining a firm direction in my life, as well as overseeing my financial and legal records. She has also promised to take me on a tour of 2 assisted living facilities. So there! Hal
That's great Hal----Going to two different facilities is a good idea. That's what I did. With your computer literacy you would do fine in a nice A L.
A L I went online and looked at some pretty nice A L places in your area. Which ones will you be touring?