Neighbors

My long time neighbor, if seven years can be considered a long time, died

And after a few months new neighbors moved in. They have been there

a few months but I have not met them yet. Just recently my neighbors on

the other side sold their house and moved away. Didn't know them well. Now

new neighbors have moved in, I think. I have a neighbor across the street

who I have not spoken to in almost eight years. I have spoken to them on occasion

or two and waved a time or two when they passed by, but they never look

my way and have never spoken. I can understand people want privacy. But

to be honest some of my neighbors seem a snobbish bunch. Their privilege.


Reminds of a neighbor I had in the city I lived before moving here.

We were neighbors and friends. One night my neighbor left his wife.

Then divorced her. She was a head nurse on the late shift. He with

the fire department. The evening before we sat, he and I, On my porch

when he said, If you see a strange vehicle Over at my place tonight Think

nothing of it, I'm leaving her. When she comes home tomorrow I'll be gone.

I will leave her a note To let her know. And he did. Both had been my friends

for thirty Years. He said he was waiting For his youngest daughter to be grown.

She is and has a good job and I'm gone.


Years ago I was going to leave but promised My dad I'd stay till the kids grew up.

You've been a good neighbor and friend, So long. I was momentarily stunned.

We talked. Later that night I sat on my darkened porch, Watched him load a pickup

truck with his things. He moved in with his girl friend, and after a short while

married her. Three, four years later he died of lung cancer, still a young man.

I guess we can not really know any one, not even those closest to us. I suppose I feel now I live in a friendless community. Suppose it's my own fault. No big deal. Just making conversation and thinking on things past

 

It used to be that it was only in the cities where people keep themselves to themselves and everyone was anonymous, but it's happening more and more in the suburbs now, as the young move in and don't feel the need to talk to the neighbours, because everything is electronic these days.

I've known most of my neighbours for close on 40 years, but many of them were middle aged when I moved in as a young 20 something most of them have either died or are into their 80's and 90's now. The ones who've died over the last few years have been replaced with the younger families or couples with no kids. They work all day and never speak unless spoken to, and then only a cursory hello , but can't get away quick enough.

Either side of me I still have the same neighbours as I had when I moved here, ( in their 80's now) ..and equally several houses further along the road are the same people who were here before me , but they are the last of the aged ones , so when they go, this road will have a very different feel to the one I've known all these years

 

You are right, @Bill Boggs , no one can know what goes on behind closed doors in a house.

How old are your new neighbors? A lot of times when an older couple die or sell, a young couple buy the house. They are not likely to have much in common with us old folks.

I see that @Holly Saunders has posted since I started this reply and said about the same thing I was thinking. She's so smart!

 

I grew up in an area where everyone knew everyone else and kept an eye on each other for better or for worse.

Now I live in an apartment complex where I know my neighbors well enough to say a polite hello and that's about it.

I'm actually closer to people on the internet than I am to my neighbors.

I suppose that it's my own fault, I value my privacy and enjoy my anonymity.

Still, it would be nice to have one close friend and confidant.

 

Yes, all my new neighbors are younger and seem to work all the time.

 

@Bill Boggs
My wife relates the fact that as a teen, her mother stressed that you never really know a man until you live with him......she was not implying consent to living together unmarried, however. So, ya tie the knot to then find out....I have done it twice.
Frank

 

Me, too, @Frank Sanoica

 

We figured when we moved to Nashville 10 years ago, things had changed in respect to neighbors.
Leaving a small Nebraska town and moving to one of the fastest growing cities in the country,
we would be greeted with some reluctance by any neighbors we might have.

I've lived in numerous cities, states and countries.

I'll always speak to or wave to anyone in the neighborhood, just the way I was taught.
Don't respond, that's OK...I still wave a greeting.

Only neighbor I don't always get along with is my son. As long as he remembers where he got
things from and that my house isn't a Walmart, we are good!

And @Bill Boggs, I enjoyed reading your post very much.

 

Thank you, Tim.

 

@Tim Burr
Comparing your experiences to my own, as I grew up in Suburban Chicago, no one, EVER, waved or otherwise acknowledged as folks passed one another, whether in cars or on foot, unless the other was known to them.

My first move away from Chicago was to Las Vegas. There, everyone was "from somewhere else". Common courteousness was very present, but again, rarely did strangers similarly greet one-another.

Then, Colorado, small prison town, Canon City, just a bit more friendly, but then everyone knew everyone else.

Churubusco, Indiana. Town virtually owned by Dana Corporation, Automotive Aftermarket giant, as well as Original Equipment Manufacturer, common to get a wave out in public.

Next, Phoenix, AZ. While there, a new phenomenon developed: "drive-by's". It reached proportions requiring advice from the PD: "When stopped at a traffic signal, do not look at the occupants of the vehicle next to yours". (??) we wondered. The guy next to us, maybe pointing a gun at us, we should simply remain unaware?? Like hell! You see a gun pointed at you, you shoot at it before it kills you, was my thinking. Never happened, thankfully, but my gun was always with me, sitting blissfully unused. Later, in Missouri, it saved us from possible poisonous result when a Copperhead appeared at our feet. The gun killed it.

Meanwhile, States began to see the light, or caved in to popular demand, I know not which, and Concealed Carry of Weapons laws sprouted up in the headlines nationwide. My home state, Illinois, notoriously Democratic, declared CCW would NEVER happen there. It did.

Now, living in finality, my last place, no more moves guaranteed, Arizona has CCW law allowing, "any state resident never convicted of a felony, may carry a concealed weapon of choice while out and about, with NO PERMIT, no pre-emptive training", no strings attached. Has the "Vigilante Vengeance" predicted followed? Hell, no. Everything's the same as before......
Frank

 

..you married a man twice, just to find out what he was really like?

 

The comments about waving to neighbors made me think of being a bored little kid in the country.

We would sit on the bank outside of my grandmother's house and wave at people driving by just to see who would wave back.

If a large truck went by we would see if we could get the driver to blow the horn for us.

 

@Holly Saunders
(gulp) I guess I tend to dig my own hole over and over......
Frank