Just to bring a smile to your face. 1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. 3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. 4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption. 5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery. 6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. 7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. 8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. 9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it. 10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. 11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.' 13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me. 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.' 15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 16. A backward poet writes inverse. 17. In a democracy, it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism, it’s your count that votes. 18. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion. 19. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine. 20. A vulture boards an air plane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' 21. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam! 22. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly, it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
Not sure where to put it but enjoyed the leading bit so see what you think of us fellows..... Recent exchange between me and my slightly more elderly widowed buddy.... ME....All this talk of ladies made me realize that I lost my wife of 40 years but still got me bloody arthritis after 50 .....what more can be said buddy? HE...We blessed my friend...many to go without said family..lost or killed by idiots ME.....Did get in touch with me girl in the bank and got that sorted no problem AND sent greeting to the two girls still left that are still there from WAY back...... HE.... Them religious folks must have some kinda secret...sex perhaps... Now belonging to "they without" we gets a dog, cat or watch ME....Least its sun out, tad cool though giving the four-legged brat his run so he could bite me elbows from a leap, the things we do fer love eh? HE.....Wait till lady runs and jumps on yer eh! ME.....Dog already has, dont ever recall Judy doing it n think I pass on that one now...... You of course know all about that kinda thing....... He....Naw them were movies watched from closing eyelids. And that my friends says it all........