I've wondered as I approached the end of the tunnel, how I might address the issue of dying. I decry "wakes", or even the "man-handling" the poor deceased must undergo by the "death preparer". Display of a person's no longer living visage for purposes of "last respects", has always led me to wonder why such activity lives on. In order for the poor deceased to be acceptable to his/her viewers, he/she must be embellished in the garb and trinketry those rememberers will have memory of. Rings, and/or other baubles worn regularly by the now departed, must be accurately depicted. Facial expression must approximate a rendition of slumber. Egad, what a charade! Beyond that, lies the burial or cremation phase. Careful perusal of offerings of valuable baubelry for sale can prove the embalmer's dishonesty. Who really knows what portion of the dead's belongings proceed with him/her to the grave, or incinerator? Only the embalmer knows. Ren Tanner may give testimony here. I propose in my case if the gravity of remaining alive is very doubtful, that I will either carry myself, if possible, if able to drive, and/or walk, or engage another to carry out my last wishes, dispatching my no longer viable living person to as remote an area as possible, no preparation or embalming, nor feigning despair over my departure, the inescapable renditions from which are uttered how good I was, or how much I will be missed, or how much good I did while living, that I will remain there in desolation until dead. Then, the nightly predatory hunters of food, the coyotes as well as the tireless ants, I suppose, will rejoice at the unexpected delicacy! They deserve me far more than some pencil-pushing accountant tallying up the rewards of running a cemetery or mausoleum. Those "plots" sold and guaranteed "in perpetuity" are a joke. Try to imagine the ceaseless bombings of perhaps Dresden, Germany, or Tokyo, Japan, unearthing and hurling cemetery-interred remains to what extent only God knows, those all having been guaranteed "perpetual peace". Frank
This is a grim topic but I had been to 2 wakes recently - my cousin and my brother's wife. The tradition here about wakes and funerals are a-changing. First is the cremation which was unheard of when I was young. My husband's parents who died in 2009 and 2013 were cremated as per their wishes. And as I had posted in another thread, the recent wake that I had attended looked more like a family reunion with the catered food cum waiters. In my cousin's wake, there was the music of the 60s and 70s being played, maybe his favorite songs. In my brother's wife's wake, there was an organ player, hired to provide live music a la karaoke. For me, I would prefer the traditional wake and funeral where the corpse is displayed. But we already had bought a columbarium for the ashes so everyone knows that I want to be cremated.
I think you need to brighten your outlook a bit, Frank. I see birth and death as doors we pass through. Like the "Arrival/Departure" signs at the airport, they are signified by accompanying rituals, designed for we observers. Mostly, these rituals are motivated by love and our desire to honor the newly born or newly dead. They are personal and bring comfort to us and order to the chaos of the event. Shakespeare tells us that death comes to the King on his throne and the rat in his hole, and that the world is a stage, and each must play our part.
I plan to be cremated, and those that are closest to me know this. I don't want much of a funeral service,,,ashes to ashes and dust to dust. Maybe a tree planted in my rememberance or a small plaque that would be it. I kind of like the tree idea, with a small marker maybe...a living rememberance of me. It is sad to think about no longer being here, but it is something we all have to face sooner or later.
I plan to be cremated also. @Frank Sanoica, did you say you plan to drive yourself somewhere to die and let the animals eat you? Or have someone drive your dead body somewhere remote and dump it? That person may end up being charged with murder. Just go with cremation, it's cheap and who cares what they put in the urn. You will be dead so don't deny your loved ones some peace of mind. Wouldn't it bother you to have your poor wife imagining all sorts of things as to how the animals are Feasting on you??
I opted for cremation, since it's the cheapest way outta here. The funeral home said I could still have a wake, for the family and friends to bid their farewells. I told him I have no friends and most of my family don't like me either.
Someone once said "If the truth were written on tombstones, we would all choose to be buried at Sea". One of my Heros, Neil Armstrong, chose to be cremated. When he died, in 2012, he was given a military service at Sea, while his ashes were spread over the water, by his Wife. A very humble act, in my opinion, for a man who could have been buried under an impressive monument. His tombstone would have been one that could have "handled the truth"! Space cowboy: Armstrong, pictured on July 20, 1969, became the first man to walk on the moon Laid to rest: Family members of Armstrong and members of the US Navy are seen during the burial at sea service; the location of his burial was not immediately clear
The problem with being buried in a cemetery for me is that people move and who will visit or take care of a grave that's across the country? My family is spread out, so what's the point of all the expense of a cemetery plot?
In the middle of nowhere is always somewhere and somewhere there is someone who will not want someone else's body decaying on their property. On the chance that said 6x3 feet of real estate is found whereby no one cares about carcasses lounging about feeding the animals then the ASPCA,PETA, and the EPA will probably have something to say about it. It would seem the duty of either or all three agencies to do a background check concerning your eating and living habits to insure that you will not in any way be a toxic entity that might possibly harm another living segment of our ECO system. Then, there is an issue with whether or not said consumers of your body will suddenly develope a taste for human flesh and organ material thereby creating a scourge on all nearby mankind from an otherwise sedentary group of carnivores. A chain reaction might occur which could possibly wipe out humanity as we know it and take us back into the Stone Age. After all is said and done I believe twould be best to be treated as campers refuse and thrown into a hole and buried lest someone should smell it or step in it.
@Frank Sanoica - One alternative to embalming, is Natural Burial. Click on 8 Burial Alternatives for 7 other options. Frank, you might prefer to be Freeze-dried! Natural Burial "Not so much a new invention as a return to old ways, natural burials are interments that take place without embalming and without the concrete vaults that line graves in most modern cemeteries. Bodies are wrapped in a shroud or placed in a biodegradable casket, the idea being that they will decompose naturally. "The natural burial movement started in1998 with the opening of the all-natural cemetery Ramsey Creek preserve in Westminster, S.C., said Mark Harris, the author of "Grave Matters: A Journey through the Modern Funeral Industry to a Natural Way of Burial" (Scribner, 2007). Today, Harris told LiveScience, there are at least 50 natural cemeteries in the country, and "scores more" regular cemeteries with sections for natural graves. "The movement is driven by dissatisfaction with typical funeral rites. "Most people, when they find out what happens in the embalming room, they're pretty horrified," said Harris, who blogs at grave-matters.blogspot.com. "They can't believe the cost, which is outrageous, and then there is this growing concern about the environmental effects of all of these procedures and of all of the goods and resources devoted to this modern method." "In addition, Harris said, many natural cemeteries double as nature preserves, and many people like the idea of contributing to the ecosystem after death. "You're actually benefiting the environment," he said. "You're allowing the body to rejoin the cycle of life."
I will be cremated and my ashes scattered to the winds. When you look up and see a rainbow, I will be there.