Well I'm batting 100% concerning ticking off my husband's family. It seems I can not do anything right, even when I'm not doing anything at all. Michael and I didn't socialize much, mainly because we were too busy, and Michael had a hard time trusting others. There was a black couple that we met way back in the early '70's. Michael, Ceaser, and his wife Bert started working together back in '72. They would come over for dinner, and play cards and dominoes fairly often. We lost touch with them back in 2010, when Bert died after a rapid course of cancer. Ceaser moved away shortly afterward. About three months ago, Ceaser found out about the deaths of both my Michaels, and he contacted my brother-in-law for my phone number. Surprisingly BIL gave it to him. We've talked a few times, and befriended each other on Facebook, but that's as far as things will ever go. Shortly after that, my youngest granddaughter called me to tell me that "everyone" was up in arms again. Other than Facebook, she is my conduit to that side of my family, and yes, I do still claim them. (It's strange, she is most like me, but we are not blood related.) She has come to the conclusion that I have become the family's convenient black sheep. She thinks that's cool. I won't go into all their suppositions, I'm sure all of you can imagine my supposed transgressions. Other than the fact that I "now" have friends that are male, this one is black!!! Ok, now that I've had a good rant, maybe I can ignore them again.
@Ina I. Wonder ....Lolol Lordy girl give it up ! You only have to please You. If it were me I would give them something to really be pissed about ...tell them y'all might become roomies or get married. Bottom line....who gives a rats as ___ what they think? Your over 21 on your own and You now come first
I think you should meet up with him and have wild, uninhibited sex. I'm just kidding because if I get wound up on bigotry, I might say some things that might offend some people on here.
Why do the "kids" feel,the need to (try ) control us tell us what company we can keep ect ,Do they think we have lost our marbles I've experienced just that where the kids are fighting over who will get What from our wills but they have a huge supprise coming to them ...and it's not in their favour
Families will be families. Depending on what part of these United States a person lives in, a black man with a white woman don't cut it. Same thing goes concerning a white man with a black woman, no matter what the relationship is. Call it whatever you want, but that's just the way it is. We see a lot of mixed color here, but didn't see it in Colorado, especially with blacks and whites. Actually, I was never use to seeing it. Funny thing is, when kids were small, parents were constantly telling them "what to do and what not to do" out of concern and parenting, and now, when kids are concerned about their parents or grandparents, they will do the same and those parents and grandparents don't like it. If you want to stay friends with this guy, that's really up to you, but be ready for any slack the family gives you for it. How to solve this..........if you do decide to stay in contact with him, just don't say anything about it to the family.
@Ina I. Wonder - I wish I had a 'black' friend so I'm all for you keeping this friendship going He must cherish the times you and the partners were enjoying good times together, it wouldn't be fair to him to disregard him now - nor fair to you either
I do understand what you are saying @Cody Fousnaugh. But their reaction is totally bogus. I still haven't seen this gentleman since 2010, and have no plans of doing so. Our sons were friends at school, and played sports together, and Ceaser and his wife, Bert, were social friends of my husband and I. The closest we will get is Facebook. I have no desire to date anyone. I'm still in love with my husband, and I don't see that changing. So them getting out of sorts about this is ridiculous. Ceaser and I have been friends for 45 years, so I saw no problem befriending him online. I'm sure we'll not see one another until one of us dies. I mean a friendship is only that. They are acting as if we ran off to Mexico and got married. I think it just an excuse to object to my not complying to their wished. They haven't spoken dirrectly to me since my husband died. They have no time for me, and they are worried that what they think is already their's might be spent before they have the chance to get their hands on it. The more I think on it, the more I am tempted to do as @Kate Ellery suggests. What is so wrong about this is that my husband was the first in his family to be born in this country. Ceaser's family has been here for generations. So other than his color, what objections could there be. It's not like we are going to start dating, and at 65, after a 47 year relationship with Michael, I think that should be my business. They didn't and don't consult me about their relationships,
Must admit, you make some very good points here Ina. I guess if I were in your situation, I might consider being online friends, but seriously doubt anymore. The "love of my life" is my wife and always will be. I very, and I do mean VERY, seriously doubt any woman could replace her and I wouldn't let that happen anyway. She feels the same way about me. Out of curiosity, why did you title your Thread this? Anyway, good luck with whatever decision you make.
Ive always had more male friends than female...just the way it worked out. I'm talking FRIENDS. As for black friends, mainly in high school. I just always lived in areas were there weren't many blacks but I would have no problem with it. My kids accepted my ex with no problem after their father died. My grandsons loved him like a grandpa because most of them never knew their real grandpa. They were either babies or not even born when my husband died.
I totally agree with how you and your Misses feel @Cody Fousnaugh. That is how I still feel about Michael. He was my main focus, the love of my life, even over my children. I was fifteen when we first started out our lives together, and I feel that he is just waiting for me. I have no desire to change things now. People like us tend to stay married even after death.
Have you been to every state in America? I've been to, and lived in areas where it wasn't nearly accepted as other areas and seldom seen. Just the way it is! You think there's nothing wrong with an interracial (mainly black-white) friendship or relationship, but truth is, there are those that just don't like it or approve of it. Go to an all black or all white neighborhood and see if there are any black-white couples.
I think it's more common today....there are many biracial babies. Yes, a few decades ago, it was a big deal but I don't see it now. Of course I haven't been in the south...only Midwest, east and west coast.