I'm very conscientious and I know I wouldn't want to live in a house were there was tragedy (murder, suicide), natural causes yes. As for our home I don't want to move if Johnny passes before me but I do want a new bed.
If your in laws suddenly show up unannounced for an undetermined amount of time.....it’s haunted! To be serious, I dunno about keeping the house thing. I do not need anything as large as the one we have but I do like to have my shop. I’d probably buy a small warehouse for my shop and cordon part of it off for sleeping quarters.
No spouse here, but when I was a child I thought I wouldn't want to live in our house if my parents died. Both of them have been gone for 3 years, and I have their house now, but it doesn't upset me at all. The first few days I would picture them in their favorite chairs when I walked in the door, but I soon associated new memories with the house.
An elderly husband and wife were sleeping one night when the wife suddenly woke up and shook her husband until he responded with a partially awake and slightly grouchy, “what’s wrong”? “I have a question for you”. “Okay” he said, “what is it? After a small pause she asked, “If I pass on before you, would you go out and find another wife”? He knew by years of marriage that he shouldn’t say anything but gave the quick reply of “NO” anyway. After another short pause she said, “Well, I think you should find a new wife because you need someone to take care of you ”! “Okay, I’ll get married again so now can we go back to sleep”? he asked. “Would you find another house” ? “No, this one is just fine” he said. Sounding a little nervous and her voice raising she asked, “I know you would sell our bed and buy a better one for you and your new wife”. “ No, I like this bed and they are expensive so why buy a new one”? was the reply. Her voice raising a little more and almost shrill she said, “And I suppose you’d let her wear my dresses”?!! “Sure, if they fit I can’t see why not”. he said. “WHY NOT you ask......and I suppose you would let her use my golf clubs too?!!! she shouted. “Nope” he said, “she’s left handed”!
I stayed in my house after my DH died. I sleep in the same bed. I sometimes drive his truck. I don't have any bad memories to disturb me. My sister-in-law and her DH bought a lot that had an old, old family cemetery on it. They said it never bothered them …………… except for the scratching...…………… and the moaning...…………..
@Shirley Martin What is your opinion regarding folks who carry an urn containing "cremains" about with them? I asked my sister when our mother died to please have her cremains saved for me such that I could bury hers and my dad's, which had accompanied me from Chicago to Vegas, then Colorado, Indiana, Phoenix, finally Missouri. My sister shuddered at the thought of ashes in a cannister, would have nothing to do with them. Had funeral home mail them to me. I buried both parents' remains in a private cemetary in Missouri. Frank
I think that was proper. But as for as keeping ashes permanently, I think that is morbid. When my daughter died, my granddaughter and niece had a necklace made from part of her ashes. They asked if I wanted one. I said, "No, thanks."
When my first wife died I remained in our home until I remarried a widow that remained in her home. It did not bother either one of us. We sold our homes, moved to another city and bought a new home together.
@Shirley Martin Far worse was the woman I saw in a casino carrying a cat.......it looked real, alive, but was not. I asked her about it. It was her beloved cat, kept looking alive and well by clever taxidermy! I thought that was SICK! Frank