Please give opinion or experience with sending a child of 12 to one or the other of these schools.This is a last resort type thing to consider, considering the child is female and an asspie. When all else had failed what would you do ?
If I am understanding the problem, she has aspergers and like those who are autistic, the problem can be so multidimensional that getting a correct opinion on a forum is impossible. I compared aspergers to autism because there are similarities between the two and with those similarities there are levels that deal with mental acuity and on a larger scale, how well they interact in a social construct. In truth, although I write this with some ambivalence, the absolute best person to ask might be a good psychiatrist and as a secondary, her personal doctor ( but only for the physical aspects). He or she can test your young lady to see at which levels she can better perform and whether or not entering such a school is even a remote possibility.
Um this is a hypothetical question..does not involve me...altho there are similarities to mine. Sorry typo error
Depending on how big an "asspie" she is. If we are talking beating up classmates, torturing dogs/cats, wannabe future serial killer....then military school will either knock some sense into her, or teach her how to be the best sociopath ever. If we are talking just generally disobedient, and driving her parents crazy, then boarding school will eliminate the problem by passing the buck to professionals.
Sending her away is just handing the problem to other people while giving the child the message that she is unwelcome. At 12 years old she is growing into a woman which is confusing enough for someone without Aspergers . I would be very careful before considering either option. I don't accept that boarding schools are staffed by proffessionals on Aspergers Syndrome or anything else. I have female friends who went to boarding schools in the UK and their experiences were anything but positiv, .often they are prison camps for children with inconvenient problems. One of the lady's in question ran away from her School virtually every week and all she learned from the situation was that her parents were selfish , uncaring and lacking in any sense of personal responsibility. She has no relationship with either of her parents today. They might as well be on Mars. It is total alienation. This is the 21'st century. Surely after all this time people can find other solutions to dealing with " problem - children " then sending them away to be people-shaped?