My half brother and I definitely don't......just a fact. Same father, different mother. I'm some 5 years younger. We were not raised around each other at all. I was in my early 30's, when I first met him. His personality and mine are considerably different. He stayed on one job for 30 some years and retired from it. I sure didn't do that! He's got an exceptional retirement income and medical. He absolutely LOVES hard/physical work and I definitely DON'T. Hates computers, or any kind of electronics, and I love all. He, and his wife, are Snowbirds and love it. Whenever we talk on the phone, like this morning, we always seem to "push each others buttons" concerning different things, we totally disagree with. Basically, I've had it with him! Neither of us want to understand the other, so it must be time to cut the ties on phone conversations. Guess there are just siblings that just don't get along, no matter how hard they try. Right?
I'm not trying to push your buttons but I've read your post three times and I can't see any real reason for disagreement or any attempt to get along on your part. I would try to keep the lines of communication open and steer away from hot-button issues. You don't have to agree with your bother's point of view on things but you should be willing to accept them. Good luck to you both.
If you really don't see eye to eye and have tried for over 30 years, then perhaps it's best to just call it a day and just send cursory Christmas cards.. Just because you're related doesn't mean you have to get along, blood is not always thicker than water that's a fact!!
One of my half brothers is upset with me because I posted a photo of myself and my brothers on Facebook, which included only those of us in my dad's first family. But there are no photos of all of together because we have never once all been together at the same time. When my dad had children with his second wife, I was living in California (I was home for the first one, but he was still a baby when I moved), my next oldest brother was living in Kentucky, the next one was in Minnesota, and only my oldest and youngest brothers were still in Michigan. Except for one of my half brothers who came out to visit a few years ago, I have only met my half brothers and sisters a couple of times, and they were very young children at the time, and I wouldn't know them if we were sitting at the same table. I know my step sister a lot better than my half brothers and sisters because I was still living in Michigan when my dad remarried, and have been in touch with her off and on. So when I think of my brothers, I am thinking of the ones who I grew up with. That's not intended as a slight or as a non-recognition of my half brothers and sisters. If not for the fact that we have always lived thousands of miles away from one another, I'd love to have been able to get to know them better.
@Cody Fousnaugh ....try that feeling with a child of your own. Like I told her...your just like your father....that's why we are divorced. We keep our distances...it does cause issues sometimes.
Thing is, he doesn't want to see things the way I see them. Him, and his wife, both believe that people should stay on a job, no matter what. Whenever I mention about layoffs, termination or even company closing...…….he just don't want to hear it. I seriously think the only people he knows, and likes knowing, is retired people who have a pension coming in. When I disagree with someone, I let them know I disagree. Some folks don't do that, like my wife when talking to her sister on the phone. She feels that she has to agree with everything her sister says, no matter what. I'm just not that way. Just how does a person not agree with someone, yet accept what they say. That sounds kind of "weak minded" to me.
Totally agree. After I got off of the phone with him, I talked to my wife at work (her using her cell phone), told her what happened and said "enough is enough, buttons being pushed to much on both sides". She totally agreed and said "just don't call him anymore, unless an emergency." So...…...that's what I'll do.
Well, to be honest with all of you, the dude has no sense of humor and whenever I've joked around with his wife, on the phone, she has no idea what I'm joking about. Even though he is only 5 years older than myself, he acts much older than I do. He sometimes thinks of me as a "smartass", but that's just me. It's extremely hard for me to get along with someone who has a very dry sense of humor.
I appreciate a dry sense of humor. Although there will always be those who will wrongly view it as no sense of humor at all, I think that makes it all the more precious. I've spent some time talking to the head of the Amish colony near here and there were times when I had returned home before I realized that he had been joking about something, and doing it quite well, although I was too stupid to pick up on it immediately.
That's me, weakminded! I have a step-brother that has led a very different life than I have, he lives by a different moral compass, has different political views, etc... When we get together we can both have a pleasant time because we don't try to defend our personal beliefs and way of life to one another, what's the point. We know we don't agree so we let things slide and concentrate on why we are together not why we are different. I guess that you and your half-brother need to do what feels right, good luck.
You are basically strangers. You may have some of the same blood but that doesn't make you family. You think he is a stick in the mud. He thinks you are a smart ass. Forget it.
@Beatrice Taylor Like my Mother, I suspect you are the lady who "soothes", who finds some good in everything, even in the bad. I wish I had inherited that ability. Frank
One of the things that got me and my wife was when he told me that we sent him a letter, from when we lived in Colorado, stating how much we hated living there, especially in the winter. Anytime Colorado is brought up in our conversation, like continuing to pack to move, he keeps referring back to the letter he says we sent him and his wife. I told him that we don't recall sending them a letter like that at all. There are lots of folks who live in Colorado that don't like the winters months there, but have to endure them because winter is part of the state. I have told him numerous times that the only reason we sold our house and moved to NC was that I didn't want my wife to fall in ice/snow and get injured to the point of surgery, like I had to have (rotator cuff), or worse, being disabled. Of course, neither of us gave it a thought that we could fall ANYWHERE we live...…….which is exactly what happened right here in the parking lot of our apartment complex in the middle of the summer. That fall required rotator cuff surgery to my other shoulder. IOW, he keeps telling me "you'll never make it again in Colorado". When he says that, it royally upsets me (in my mind, that is). Then, to counteract what he says to me, I ask him what he will do when possibly heath would stop them from being snowbirds and they'd have to sell and live in one place. He doesn't like hearing that. So, in-between those two things and his thinking that everyone should stay on a job for 30 years, to have a good retirement income, we can get on each other's nerves.
@Cody Fousnaugh, there are some subjects you just have to avoid with certain people. Try this... Next time you call him, think of some things completely different from "moving to Colorado", or "career choices", to talk about. Write down a couple of subjects on paper before you call and keep it in front of you. If he brings up the forbidden subjects, ignore him, and move to the second subject. Just a thought.