If one be at "odds" with a forum group's general contentions about some particular point, he or she faces a minor dilemma: stay tuned in and fight to prove their point (usually fruitless), or stay tuned in to provide insights outside of the "battle", or leave. "Minor" because it is that, in reality, despite it's impact on the individual's psyche. Such dilemma has driven me off of numerous forums (as well as aided by being banned), and there were instances where I resolved to quit the internet altogether! So psychologically involved had I become, though unknowingly, until finally, I understood, after much "soul-searching". I have been praised, denounced, demonized even, declared fraudulent in my extensive contributions to my hometown (Berwyn, Illinois) forum, www.berwyntalk.com by members who, even though they resided there then, had no earlier exposure to the Berwyn I knew growing up, and during my 20s (I left at 30). That forum gradually declined, and may not even any longer exist. If it does, and you may choose to waste your valuable time in my behalf, by all means go there, look at the very earliest entries under "Reminisce about Berwyn", a category which was non-existent when I joined, and was added by the Admin. Frank
I'm with you ken...I state it, leave it...and rarely ever rise to the bait of someone who is obviously trying to dangle a worm to start the fight... I simply can't be bothered...
It's dangerous to take the internet world to the same level of feeling as one would the 3D world. From the Four Agreements "Don't take anything personally: Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally… Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world."
I agree with this, and since most people are not going to change how they think or feel about something, regardless of any facts presented, (until they themself are ready to change), it makes no sense to continue to argue about something. I sometimes ignore a topic completely if it is contentious, or if i want to contribute, then I say what ever I want to say, and then leave it at that. The old saying comes to mind, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink”.
I bypass all the 'hot button' topics. I've learned outside of forums that I am either a 'miss-know-it-all' or 'I don't know what I'm talking about' which are fightin' words.
Agree. Plus there are those who just can't seem to let things go. Some people have a need to always have the last word, so I let them. "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."
I don't know that I enjoy an argument, but I do enjoy an educated discussion of opposing views, as that is how I educate myself and understand other's opinions. I don't appreciate ridicule, abuse, name-calling, or condescension. If an idea is presented in those ways, I simply ignore it.
Especially when the forum in question is used to having a membership featuring a self-congratulatory attitude and is flummoxed if a new person comes along with a different viewpoint, upsetting the apple-cart of automatic group agreement. That's always a distraction it seems.