I am convinced that most of our lives and how we live were not by chance, but by the Choices that we have made. Sure S--t Happens but we still then must make choices. I feel fortunate that most of choices I have made turned out for the best. In looking back over my life I really can't recall making a bad choice.
I have told my children that much of their lives are determined by choices made between 18 and 25 years of age. While this is not strictly always true, I believe that it applies to most individuals. If you make bad choices in your early 20s, they haunt you for much of your life. Some things DO happen that are beyond your control, like Vietnam totally changed the course of my life.
I agree that good/bad choices can have a profound effect on our lives. But I also believe that many things happen that are far beyond our control.
Yes, I suppose if you are diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor you still have to make those pesky funeral arrangement decisions.
Sometimes chance (Fate) extremely limits our choices. A child born in the ghetto to an unwed mother with seven other children doesn't have quite as many choices as a child born in a wealthy suburb to upper class parents. Those of us who had an opportunity to make good choices are blessed, indeed.
The Ghetto Kid still has to choose between what is right and what is wrong, and he does know the difference.
Your being deliberately provocative I feel , Lon. In the example Beth gave.. someone with Brain cancer could often not even have the ability to think clearly much less make life saving choices... My father started beating me when I was 4 years old.... and rarely a day went by while I lived with him where he didn't beat me, kicking, belting, punching ,...was that my choice, could I have chosen to stop him? What about innocent victims of crime.. ?..it's their choice to be mugged, raped, beaten, stabbed, robbed...or killed... Is it?
Perhaps Lon is refering to Choices made within our control. I made bad choices in my younger years- I think due to a lack of maturity and being told my only life mission was being mother and wife. Life events changed my decision making process in the end I feel I made much better choices.
We all have to live and learn, no matter what our upbringing, for those as Shirley stated - its tougher Some kids emulate their parents, for others, their path will be the opposite - by choice
I agree with this, and it does apply to both what Lon said and what Holly said. At age four, she had no choice in life but to accept what happened to her, and to survive the best she could; but going through that kind of upbringing can help a person to make a choice to not be involved with that kind of person once they are able to make their own life choices. And also, some abused kids to grow up to become abusive parents themselves, and others use this to make the decision to never be that way when they have children, so even though it is not an immediate change, it is a choice that affects their life.