Gaslighting

Discussion in 'Philosophy & Psychology' started by Ken Anderson, Sep 4, 2020.

  1. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    Gaslighting

    "Gaslighting is an insidious form of manipulation and psychological control. Victims of gaslighting are deliberately and systematically fed false information that leads them to question what they know to be true, often about themselves. They may end up doubting their memory, their perception, and even their sanity. Over time, a gaslighter’s manipulations can grow more complex and potent, making it increasingly difficult for the victim to see the truth." -- Psychology Today

    We are living in a perpetual state of gaslighting.

    The reality that we are being told by the media is at odds with what we are seeing with our own two eyes. And when we question the false reality that we are being presented, or we claim that what we see is that actual reality, we are vilified as racist or bigots or just plain crazy. You’re not racist. You’re not crazy. You’re being gaslighted.

    New York State has twice as many deaths from Covid-19 than any other state, (32,971 - 9/4/20 #2 NJ 15,971) and New York has accounted for one fifth of all Covid-19 deaths, but we are told that New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has handled the pandemic better than any other governor. But if we support policies of Governors whose states had only a fraction of the infections and deaths as New York, we’re called anti-science and want people to die.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    We see mobs of people looting stores, smashing windows, setting cars on fire and burning down buildings, but we are told that these demonstrations are peaceful protests. And when we call this destruction of our cities, riots, we are called racists.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    We see the major problem destroying many inner-cities is crime; murder, gang violence, drug dealing, drive-by shootings, armed robbery, but we are told that it is not crime, but its the police that are the problem in the inner-cities. We are told we must de-fund the police and remove law enforcement from crime-riddled cities to make them safer. But if we advocate for more policing in cities overrun by crime, we are accused of being white supremacists and racists.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    The United States of America accepts more immigrants than any other country in the world. The vast majority of the immigrants are “people of color”, and these immigrants are enjoying freedom and economic opportunity not available to them in their country of origin, but we are told that the United States is the most racist and oppressive country on the planet, and if we disagree, we are called racist and xenophobic.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    Capitalist countries are the most prosperous countries in the world. The standard of living is the highest in capitalist countries. We see more poor people move up the economic ladder to the middle and even the wealthy class through their effort and ability in capitalist countries than any other economic system in the world, but we are told capitalism is an oppressive system designed to keep people down.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    Communist countries killed over 100 million people in the 20th century. Communist countries strip their citizens of basic human rights, dictate every aspect of their lives, treat their citizens like slaves, and drive their economies into the ground, but we are told that Communism is the fairest, most equitable, freest and most prosperous economic system in the world.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    The most egregious example of gaslighting is the concept of “white fragility”. You spend your life trying to be a good person, trying to treat people fairly and with respect. You disavow racism and bigotry in all its forms. You judge people solely on the content of their character and not by the color of their skin. You don’t discriminate based on race or ethnicity. But you are told you are a racist, not because of something you did or said, but solely because of the color of your skin. You know instinctively that charging someone with racism because of their skin color is itself racist. You know that you are not racist, so you defend yourself and your character, but you are told that your defense of yourself is proof of your racism.

    So, we ask ourselves, am I crazy? No, you’re being gaslighted.

    Gaslighting has become one of the most pervasive and destructive tactics in American politics. It is the exact opposite of what our political system was meant to be. It deals in lies and psychological coercion, and not the truth and intellectual discourse.

    If you ever ask yourself if you’re crazy, you are not.

    Crazy people aren’t sane enough to ask themselves if they’re crazy. So, trust yourself, believe what’s in your heart. Trust our eyes over what we are told. Never listen to the people who tell you that you are crazy, because you are not, you’re being gaslighted.

    -- John Kilroy
     
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  2. Hugh Manely

    Hugh Manely Very Well-Known Member
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    Its a real thing, no doubt.

    According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline’s fact sheet, the techniques a gaslighter might use to manipulate someone else can include:
    • Withholding (meaning he or she refuses to listen or says they don’t understand)
    • Countering (when the abuser questions the gaslightee’s memory of an event)
    • Blocking/diverting (when the abuser changes the subject or questions the victim’s thinking)
    • Trivializing (making the victim’s needs or feelings seem unimportant)
    • Forgetting/denial (when the manipulator pretends to have forgotten what actually happened or denies something he or she had previously agreed to)
     
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  3. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    Thanks, Ken. Very good piece. I sent it out to my email list.
     
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  4. Nancy Hart

    Nancy Hart Supreme Member
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    A person is being gaslighted if he is being told lies.

    A person can just as easily be gaslighted, if someone tells him he is being gaslighted, when he really is not. :)
     
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  5. Ed Wilson

    Ed Wilson Veteran Member
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    If you recognize what you are being told is untruthful, you just avoid it's source. It's easy, use the remote.
     
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  6. Martin Alonzo

    Martin Alonzo Supreme Member
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    The medical system has been gaslighted the public for 100 years. Why if all animals get sick, why do farm animals have a cure for the same diseases that people don't. If farm animals used the same medical system as humans a hamburger would be two hundred dollar a pound. Also animal don't have money. .
     
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  7. Dwight Ward

    Dwight Ward Veteran Member
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    About TV, if every channel is telling lies the remote won't help. A hammer to the screen is the solution.
     
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  8. Terry Coywin

    Terry Coywin Veteran Member
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    Better yet, just laugh at the idiots for thinking we are the idiots.
     
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  9. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    A few nights ago, I watched the old 1944 movie, "Gaslight" with Ingrid Bergman and Charles Boyer. I believe that movie (or the preceding 1938 play) was where the expression originated.
     
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  10. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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  11. Silvia Benoit

    Silvia Benoit Veteran Member
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    Would you say that "" Gaslighting"" is what Fidel Castro used to convince most Cubans to believe in him? Is "gaslighting" what the left is using now in USA and in all the countries with weak democracies?
    Is "gaslighting" what a friend's mother did to her daughter during years and today (mother died 10+ years ago) this friend has not yet recovered?
     
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  12. Nancy Hart

    Nancy Hart Supreme Member
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    'Gaslighting' is Merriam-Webster's word of the year for 2022

    Lookups for the word on merriam-webster.com increased 1,740% in 2022 over the year before. But there wasn't a single event that drove significant spikes in curiosity, as it usually goes with the chosen word of the year. The gaslighting was pervasive.

    "It's a word that has risen so quickly in the English language, and especially in the last four years, that it actually came as a surprise to me and to many of us," said Peter Sokolowski, Merriam-Webster's editor at large.


    The dictionary offers two definitions for the term:

    The first describes it as “psychological manipulation of a person usually over an extended period of time that causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or memories and typically leads to confusion, loss of confidence and self-esteem, uncertainty of one’s emotional or mental stability, and a dependency on the perpetrator.”

    The second, a bit more succinct, defines “gaslighting” as “the act or practice of grossly misleading someone especially for one’s own advantage.”

    Personally, I think the second definition is way too broad.
     
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  13. Marie Mallery

    Marie Mallery Veteran Member
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    Maybe I should have read more carefully before commenting?
     
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    Last edited: Nov 30, 2022
  14. Nancy Hart

    Nancy Hart Supreme Member
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    I don't associate gaslighting with politics.

    I've been gaslighted by only two people that I know of. A former neighbor and a former boss. Neither concerned politics. But I don't get out and about as much as most people.
     
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  15. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    The politics of this time, worldwide, are all about gaslighting.
     
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    Last edited: Dec 1, 2022

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