She repeated -in Spanish- "You are ugly". Please. I know what I heard and I saw the child's face. Trust me, it was abuse.
I do. If you think burning a child with cigarettes, or sexually assaulting a child, is no worse than jokingly referring to him as an idiot when he does something stupid, then perhaps that's the problem. As I said earlier, it cheapens the definition of the word.
Abuse is abuse....mild or horrendous...I guess I should have been specific and said: The emotional impact -in both cases- will affect the child forever. The way I see this is 1) The abuser starts by causing emotional pain and 2) Continues with the physical one. You may have dealt with many cases of abuse... but I am sure you never were verbally / emotionally abused. I was.
You haven’t been on this forum long enough to know but there are a few folks here that were highly abused as kids. Not just the normal paddling nor an occasional curse word, but abuse that would send a parent up for life in prison type of abuse. Now, if you’d just settle down for a moment and catch your breath, good air in, bad air out, and think of it, there definitely is a breaking point in what you call abuse and what others are indicating. No one said that you didn’t witness the event you opened with. No one (but one) said that you were not right in saying something. No one wrote that you are a bad teacher and didn’t know what you are doing or saw. No one. My conversation with another southerner was simple but you decided to take offense at it. Nothing was written that should have offended you but yet....I’ll leave it at that. That said, you seem to have a problem of looking at things in more than one direction. There are definitely different levels of “abuse” just as there are different levels of correction, love, like, dislike, pain, pleasure etc. I am pleased that you’re so adamant about your feelings concerning child abuse but there are people here who are just as experienced with it and are merely offering up their own opinions on the matter. Take a chill pill, relax. Grab a tea and converse.
Do you remember what the Spanish word she used which you took as ugly? Google brought these up below. Translations of ugly adjective feo ugly, unsightly, nasty, homely, foul, tacky repugnante disgusting, repugnant, nasty, revolting, loathsome, ugly asqueroso disgusting, gross, foul, nasty, revolting, ugly inquietante disturbing, disquieting, worrying, worrisome, perturbing peligroso dangerous, hazardous, perilous, risky, nasty, pernicious violento violent, fierce, harsh, wild, raging, savage nada grato ugly ñato ugly macaco ugly, silly malhecho shoddy, ugly
Excuse me, Silvia, you don't know Ken's full life, do you? As for myself, I understand what Ken is saying. If a parent sort of kiddingly calls their child "stupid" or "a little sh-t" or whatever, that's not necessarily abuse. Children, either at home, at a store or even at a some ones home, can act up. That's when the word "discipline" comes in. If the child deserves to be disciplined, it deserves it. But, from what I understand, the public doesn't necessarily have the right to interfere with how a parent is towards their own children. Only my opinion. And, as I've already asked you, but no reply from you...........how will you feel if CPS does nothing to the mother? It takes more than a court appearance to make something happen. Investigation of the entire incident has to happen. Will you be notified what happens in court and/or by CPS?
IMHO more people should get involved when witnessing child abuse...and no, I don't think saying "You are sh..t" on account of bad behavior is child abuse...but repeatedly saying "You are ugly" to a child who was doing nothing wrong...and ignoring the child's pain is child abuse.
I am sorry for the member who were abused but -as I said- abuse is abuse regardless of how horrible or mild it was....and no, I won't tell you my personal experience on this matter.....simply allow me to say that I recognize abuse even with my eyes closed. And, please, don't tell me how to "breathe".
I would not have interjected myself in that situation but if it bothered me so much I would have alerted the police if around of what I witnessed.
Sure, by DEFINITION, abuse is abuse and there’s no question about that. Again, not one person, has said anything different but you have to agree that in today’s world, some things that are deemed as being “criminal” abuse were “teaching moments” of yesteryear. A swat on the backside cannot be categorized on the same level as leaving welts on a kid after being beat nor telling a kid they are stupid or ugly. That said, a swat on the backside can get a person arrested nowadays. And yes, yes.....before you write it, a swat is abusive but to me, it’s the kind of abuse every kid needs now and then. Oh and by the bye. As I suggested before, hitting that quote button sure does make it easier to follow along without having to figure out whom you are relating to. Note 2: I merely asked you to calm down and breath a bit but rather than take it the way it was meant, you got offended. As I wrote in another post on another thread, I’m very stoic about just about everything so don’t read in what isn’t there. I’m not sitting here smiling nor am I trying to be mean.
Thousands of years ago, it was also the "opinion"(if you insist) of messengers of the Creator Himself - they warned that busybody single women should not gossip and meddle in things as they had no right to do so .... in today's governments in society, too many laws have changed that to allow anarchists / individuals bringing chaos, and groups bringing disorder/ to "have their say" even anonymously bringing harm to children and families and leaders and groups , although all that which is done in secret will all be revealed one day, with perfect justice being executed ...