I read articles and I spoke to friends about this matter; some said one must try to accept their behavior, no to confront them...no to react to their aggressions...even to try to be friendly with them. While I know these people suffer from different emotional conditions I disagree with the approaches suggested. When a person shows any of the conditions mentioned I remove myself from his / her proximity. I feel self-preservation comes first.
This reminds me of the "Which one doesn't belong?" game. I think you must mean self-centered or egotistical, rather than narcissistic. Narcissists never come across as toxic or obnoxious, or even unpleasant. In fact they are almost always the most popular person in a group...at first. They seem too good to be true. Because they play act the part. I think most people who are described as "toxic" or "obnoxious" or self-centered, are harmless. They don't upset me. I just try to get along and think of being around them as a learning experience in how not to be.
If one studies the psychological platforms of each trait, one will find that all 3 are completely different. Obnoxious is just an adverb describing someone who is as odious as that guy or gal cursing loudly at a bar or as simple as a child who continually reaches for the candy at a grocery store. Annoying yes but almost always easily avoided. Now, toxicity is a whole realm all by itself and the parameters are so widely spread that very few humans can say that they do not fit into at least one of those headings. Instead of going to find a paper on it, here are 15 of them that are posted on Google. https://ideapod.com/7-common-traits-toxic-people/#:~:text= 15 Common Traits of Toxic People, According,they apologize if it’s never their... More Now, the narcissistic trait is one that we all find ourselves falling in line with particularly when we feel that our own looks or demeanor is more important than anything that goes on around us. In the case of Dorian Grey or the likes, it poses as a severe problem but generally speaking, it’s pretty innocent. My goodness, at nearly 71, I can be quite the narcissist when it comes to muscle mass especially when I’m at the gym because at those times, it is indeed all about me. Face lift anyone or do we buy more anti-wrinkle cream or spend a G-note for that portrait?
I never said these three trait were synonyms...only that IMHO is very healthy to remove oneself from the people who "practice" such behavior.
That’s very true which is why psychology is not nor will ever be an exact science. The problem I believe we all have is establishing “how” we react to different psychological stimuli. e.g. Are we in control of our own emotions / reactions? Do we overly react to that which we have no control? In either case, we have choices and those choices determine our own state of well being or otherwise. I have heard way too often someone saying outright or alluding to someone else being so toxic or abominably obnoxious that their joy has been stolen. That to me is rather accusatory and blatantly false for indeed, no one can steal one’s joy.....it has to be given away by feeding into it or being offended by it. The AA prayer says something like being given the serenity to accept the things one cannot change, courage to change the things that need to be changed and the wisdom to know the difference. Wise statement indeed.
Could the problem be that you are too easily offended, or that you have trouble relating to people who aren't just like you? We all have different personalities and, while there will always be those who will seek to impose a hivemind on the rest of the world, I enjoy people who are unique. I won't necessarily invite them all into my house but it seems healthier to learn to live with all sorts of people than to try to make everyone behave in the way that I would like them to. As for toxicity, that often has as much to do with the receiver as the sender.
Ideally, I agree but some cases just aren’t that easy to avoid. We’ve both been in classrooms as teachers whereby so many different personalities can be suffocating at times. That said, since there is no direct way to avoid some toxic personalities or confrontational students, it is how we react to those personalities on any given moment that might determine whether anyone learns or not or how we are perceived as an instructor. I do have to admit, that there were several occasions when I would go to the gym after a class and find the nearest heavy bag to punch.
I am sure there are people who can't stand me even on a photo but when the person/ s who annoys me also annoys others your assumption about me being "easily offended or troubling relating to others" loses all strength.
Who wrote that they can’t stand you or maybe your photo? I do have a question. Did you read the criteria that I posted for recognizing toxic people? Best read it again or if you haven’t it’s an easy read. You really are easily offended and do not seem to have the ability to say “you’re right or I agree or even thank you but instead lash out as though someone were persecuting you. You have 244 messages with 184 likes (of which a few of them I awarded) so it appears that no one is out to get you. Again, chill out lady.