Today I'm feeling a bit more like myself, not as shaky and queasy. I'm trying not to take any nausea medication today and just see how it goes. I suppose this "journey" is going to be filled with ups and downs, but I hope for more ups. I really hate that my taste buds are so jacked up and everything just tastes weird and kind of nasty, even water. I've developed one more annoying side effect of chemo; my vision is blurry and it's hard to focus my eyes. This is annoying because I can't see very well to read, and I have to enlarge my laptop screen and do a lot of squinting. Since I spend a lot of time putzing on the computer or reading on my Kindle, my normal activities are stymied. It's raining so I can't go outside to pull weeds, but then I probably can't see them anyway.
Sorry to hear about your vision. Hopefully, it will be ok in a few days. That is some nasty stuff they are giving you. Glad you are feeling a bit better today.
Last week I thought I just needed to get new glasses since I missed my eye exam last year. My oncologist cautioned me not to spend money on glasses right now because they won't work when chemo is done. So I'll just feel my way around.
@Beth Gallagher Your personal resilience flummoxes me! Nowhere have I known anyone with such clarity of outlook, considering the circumstances. One in a million, you are, and best of all, you do not brag about it! Frank
Aw, Frank. I'm not worthy of such praise. If you saw me whining like a 5-year old and ugly-crying until I get hiccups you'd have to revise that opinion. Thank you, though.
I agree with Frank. What we see is your forum conduct and that is exemplary. Your clarity of thought is inspiring and your willingness to share without an agenda trying to sway others to agree with you is honorable. Also, each of your posts is fresh and not repetition that is so commonly seen when one gets such a harsh diagnosis and treatment plan. When I see a little snark in your posts, I know you are going to beat this thing. I loved hearing about your wigs and seeing the photos, but you didn't keep repeating about them and giving us details on who designed them and what famous people wore ones like them and what boots you wear with them and then repeat it all seventeen times.
@Beth Gallagher - your chemo reminds me of my year being on Prednisone. Swollen face, very thinning hair, nasty taste in mouth, lack of sleep, weight loss, blurry vision, the list goes on. I have recovered though. Granted chemo is much worse, but there is some similarities. Hang in there, someday soon , you will be drinking a beer, posting on here about how how sick you were last year
In this moment of time Such a high mountain to climb As the seasons pass That Mountain won't last The incline will changed and reduce your task As you walk-along level grass
You guys are so kind and supportive; it really helps to "put it all out there" and not sit here stewing in my own juices. I talk to my husband but I try to keep things light; he is obviously afraid for me and that is hard for both of us. So I can come here and type things out, then put my mind on something else. @Faye Fox -- You are too kind. Unfortunately one hallmark of a seniors forum is that seniors post on it, with all the repetitive tendencies that go along with aging minds. Sometimes I get annoyed by it, but then I realize that it just goes with the territory. I talked to my sister a couple of days ago; she is 10 years older than me and within a 20 minute talk she had told me the same fishing story THREE times. It makes me sad. So I'm hanging onto mental clarity as hard as I can, but if I repeat myself then feel free to tell me to knock it off. Oh, and I'm trying to tone down the snark but I'm afraid it's ingrained in me. As for the wigs-- I never wear them. They are hot and scratchy and generally make me feel worse than I already do, though I freely admit that I look better with one on!! I'm all about comfort these days. @Gloria Mitchell -- I know you went through a tough time last year and I'm so glad you got better. All of us have something to deal with at this age. I think a serious diagnosis simply brings our own mortality into sharp focus. Death can't be avoided, but it's certainly nice to live each day in a little bubble of denial!! When diagnosed with a terminal illness, we are forced to face our own impending death as never before, and it changes one's outlook as nothing else can.
That would be a concern. Losing my eyesight is something that I worry about because my eyes are getting worse as the years go by. I was really concerned about a week ago because my vision was as if my glasses were foggy, but they weren't, and taking them off didn't help. I put some eye drops in and that seemed to make it worse for a couple of minutes, but then they cleared. Later that same day, the same thing happened. I used some more eye drops before going to bed, and haven't had that problem since. Overall though, I can't read the text descriptions of streaming movies without getting up and walking close to the television, which triggers Ella because that's where her cat treats are kept. Hopefully, your eyesight won't be adversely affected on any permanent basis.
When did you last have an eye exam, Ken? Have you been checked for cataracts? I worry about macular degeneration since my father had that. I hope none of the stupid chemo side effects turn out to be permanent, but who the heck knows.
Since the eye drops helped I would guess it was dry eye which is very common at our age. Cataracts never get better and a doctor should keep an eye on them. I didn't realize how bad mine were and what clean white looked like. After my cataracts were removed years ago, I don't have to ever change my prescription so I only go to the eye MD surgeon. I go every 4 months because of glaucoma. My old optometrist isn't happy about it since he can't sell me overpriced glasses every year.
Only a couple of months ago. My prescription changed only a little bit. I do have the beginning of cataracts but he said it hadn't advanced any since the last time he saw me, about a year prior, and that it wasn't anything to worry about yet.