As I said - passive aggressive behaviour, cannot be allowed to fester ................... Someone needs to speak up - don't they ..................
Maybe we should let things slide away and stay on topic Frank did say in his first post on the subject that he may have the wrong idea, that should be enough not to go on about it He's naughty - but nice
@Patsy Faye "Nice" is nice, but "Nasty-Nice" is the sort of spurred ridicule dished out by folks of wavering temperament. Frank
Years ago, my son's mother had to go through a course in Bio-feedback for back pain therapy. For the entire 3 weeks she had to attend a group therapy session once a day that taught people how to better their lives by being slightly more aggressive or assertive by saying what they really felt when they were faced with certain situations. One of the doctors explained to me that a majority of people had a problem with saying "yes", as an example, when they actually mean and want to say "no" but cannot. Such passivity causes a few problems: Stress, which leads to pain; anger, which leads to pain; and sometimes an eventual outward explosion of aggression, which...yes, leads to pain. Granted, not all passive / aggressive people have a bad back but a course in assertion is certainly a good thing for just about everyone who has a problem with loaning money, a lawnmower, or working on their days off but do so anyway. Anyone who can be talked into anything at anytime needs a course in assertiveness. The good doctor also explained, as another example, that it would be far better if some ladies would not simply accommodate their husbands but on the other hand not use the headache technique as an opt out. If they would merely say I do not feel like it right now there would be less tension and hidden anger. Not sure what the husband is supposed to say or do but I didn't go that far in the course. I was only allowed 1 week free with Kat. Sometimes I feel like forums are like that. A place whereby people can unload all of their aggressions because they cannot do so when there are multiple situations that are face to face in real life. Let's face it, most discussion groups on line are not in any way real time and real life situations. People write things they wouldn't dream of saying to another person mono e mono. There is almost a Biblical solution to the behavior in that we are told to let our yea's be yea, and our nay's be nay. Ah yes......another ancient cure for modern day ills. ............ S
I think people that show this trait are insecure, I've known a couple who forever find fault with 'everyone' They can never be happy whilst they look for the worst in people
Speaking of negativity and insecurity, the mob mentality is evident when some people crawl out of the woodwork, in full reprimand mode, shake their finger, contribute nothing of value, and try to bully someone into thinking like they do.
@Arlene Richards - no Arlene, I believe you are very wrong on that, if you are speaking on 'this thread' I am well used to that mentality having witnessed it many times This forum is above that, the point on this particular thread and subject, is that Frank 'did say' - he may have got it wrong
I am totally convinced that everyone is really waiting for your response to your own thread @Arlene Richards. Other than chastising Frank and a cookie dough recipe which was totally off topic we know nothing about how you feel about passive / aggression. Are you perhaps looking for more information on the subject from someone who possibly might have such tendencies or are you waiting to let us in on what the subject means to you?
I don't know many passive aggressive people and the few I have come across weren't close enough to me to be bothered. It's really not up to me to change anybody's behavior, so if someone bothers me I avoid them. I'm talking about forums and not real life. Different if you have to live with someone that has behavior that upsets you.