On Job Interviews

Because of my constant job hopping in search of the perfect career choice, I spent a lot of time being interviewed. And some of those interviewers were mind boggling. There was Hilda the Hun. She did the hiring at a large tractor manufacturing plant 30 miles from my home. There I was, sitting in a waiting room with about a dozen other guys after filling out several pages of application form. An older, hefty looking woman in a dark women’s business suit came to the door and called my name. I noted she’s even wearing a neck tie, for crissakes. This can’t be a good sign.
She was all businesslike, barking out questions rapid fire, never once the hint of a smile. Then she was silent and frowning as she shuffled through my pages of forms.
“You’ll start next Monday at 11 PM, third floor machine shop your boss will be expecting you don’t be late leave now”.
At another plant I was interviewed by some attractive young lady wearing a nice dress, short on the bottom and low enough on the top to hint at her finer points. At some time during the interview, she dropped her pen. It rolled a few feet away so she stood up to pick it up, facing me. I swear, I could see down her dress to her belly button. She sat back down and continued on, eventually hiring me. I said a silent prayer that I could get out of there without embarrassing myself.
Hiring was simple and uncomplicated back then. I remember when I got hired at a small steel fabricating company. The owner and boss’s name was Bill. At the time I was unemployed because of a layoff and heard that Bill was going to take on a few men because of a large contract he had. Bill gave me an application with just a few basic questions on it. After I filled it out and he looked at it, he said “I see your from the next town downriver”. Then Bill went to his office door and yelled “Benny, come here”. A guy I presumed to be Benny came in.
Bill spoke to Benny, “You know this guy”?
Benny-“Never saw him before”.
Bill- “Why not? He’s from your town”?
Benny-“Bill, there’s 20,000 people in my town and I only know maybe a few hundred and he ain’t one of ‘em”.
Benny and I both had a laugh and I got hired anyway.
Somewhere along the way job applications got longer and more complicated. Some were downright silly. Why would they need to know my mother’s maiden name? One company wanted to know what wage I would need to live on. I left that blank. I was asked why I left it so and I said I needed to know what the job pays, then I’ll tell you if I can live on that. I didn’t get that job.
In those days I had a “go to” job. We have a major food processing plant in my town. If I was temporarily unemployed, I would apply there. In the summer they were always very busy and I always got hired.
Now, I’m happily retired and glad I don’t have to go through all the application forms, waiting and interviews.

 

In my application with the bank, I had to fill up a long form that included my mother's maiden name, hahahaaa. And since I was young and excited, I had to go over the filled out form not once but twice to check on what I had written. That's no big deal since the information therein were standard except for the essay part that wanted me to explain why I wanted to join the company which was a commercial bank.

The harder part is the written exams, a kilometric one.

 

The strangest interview I had was for a phone sales job. Before that interview I had to fill in numerous pages of application form, provide references etc. There were a number of vacancies to fill and it was a team interview. I was the only female and was years older than any of the other candidates.

First we had to introduce ourselves individually, then partner up and discuss what we thought were the most important features we would like to see in a credit card.

Next we had to form two teams and one team had to argue in support of a hypothetical situation, which the other team opposed, and then argue against the same arguement while the other team supported it.

After that we were each interviewed separately. The interviewer took a look at my application form and said to me "Honestly, Ruth, with your experience you could do this job standing on your head", which must have meant that he thought I was too old, because I was not offered the job.

 

I wouldn't necessarily say it was my weirdest interview, but it was undoubtedly my most hung over. I had arranged a job interview and was being very responsible by having a quiet night in. At about seven o'clock, a friend turned up and was in a very down state. He really wanted to go for a drink. I explained the situation but he wasn't going to take no for an answer. I agreed to come out but said I'd only be having a couple and that was it.

The result, predictably, was that I got home somewhere near midnight, considerably the worse for wear. I just about made it on time to the interview the next morning. My head was throbbing, my stomach was churning and my mouth felt like a desert through which the entire Foreign Legion were marching. This was not ideal.

Amazingly, I got the job and I stayed with the company for almost fourteen years, the longest I've ever stayed in one place.

 

My strangest job interview was on the phone. I was hired without an in-person meeting. They indicated my qualifications I spoke about were more than sufficient for the job. and there was no need for me to come in and fill out an application. After I worked there a few days, I realized it was not going to be the most ideal job, but it paid the bills, so I stayed on for the long haul.

From what I understand, corporations such as Google, have a totally weird in-person interview question process. Fortunately, when I worked for Google as an independent contractor the application was normal, but very long and detailed. First I had to fill out an extremely long and involved application. Then I had to prove that I was eligible for the job by passing a difficult test. Then, I was interviewed on the phone. After I passed the background check, I had to sign a Non Disclosure Agreement about the job. The entire process took six weeks. Best job I ever had.

 

Sounds like the interview was the job!

 

I’ve had quite a few strange interviews, but a few stick out.

In the mid 70s I was working but exploring other opportunities. I applied for a job with an insurance company, and was called to interview. I was interviewed by the office manager, and as soon as I sat down I got a strange vibe. She started crying/sobbing and said “Excuse me, but I got a call last night that my daughter just got engaged.” I replied “Oh, how wonderful!”

Okay, I know people get emotional about such things but this was in the afternoon. I’d think she had time to get herself together or even reschedule the interview. The woman talked more about her family than she did about the vacant position. Ugh.

Another one was the guy who scheduled the interviews at a restaurant (not fancy, kind of a family place – clean, safe). So when I sat down he asked if I wanted something and I just said an iced tea would be nice. Then they brought his food. OMG, I have never seen one person shovel away so much food in one sitting! And this man was not just big, he was HUUUUUUGE (thanks Donald Trump). A very messy eater, too. Gross. Talked with food in his mouth and belched. When he finished dinner, he ordered a big ice cream sundae with all the fixins. Then he got droopy-eyed. I was glad when that interview was over.

Then there was the guy who kind of cast my resume aside and asked if I wanted to meet later for a drink. (I didn’t.)

 

I recall a strange job interview:
My work history included two places that went out of business.
The interviewer said, "You seem to be attracted to places that went out of business."
I knew it wasn't the place for me, so I replied, "Yeah....I do have some amazing powers."

 

HAHA - "So....why do you want to work here?"
"I've always admired the Burger King chain."

 

I was interviewing once for a small company that dealt in polyclonal antibodies to various things. I was interviewing with one of their VPs and he said perhaps the best way to start was to tell me a little bit about himself. I kid you not that he proceeded to talk about himself, nearly non-stop for the next 25 minutes. THEN he says, “You know, I’m getting a really good feeling about this but it’s too bad you don’t have any immunology experience.”

I, managing to not be completely dumbfounded, said, “I’ve taken graduate level immunology and have 4 years lab experience doing immunocytochemistry. It’s in my résumé.” “Oh! Perfect!” he says.

insert face palm emoji here