With Father's Day coming up, I was remembering how I never realized my Dad was a genius until I was 35. If I had followed his guidance at a younger age, it could've saved me quite a few mistakes. This morning I remembered one of the odd ones. He said if I was going to smoke, just promise him I would never talk with a cigarette in my mouth or walk with a lit one in my hand. He thought that was unladylike. To this day, I've never done either of those things. I'm sure everyone has a few Dad stories. What are some of yours?
Sorry, but I'd only have negative stories to share about my father. He was definitely no genius. I'll have to wait for Mother's Day then.
I learned quite a bit even though we never got along until the last couple of years of his life. So far as his life skills, I learned what not to do but those skills such as woodworking and construction, he taught me well what can be done and how to do it. The thing is, that’s all he wanted me to learn and he wanted me to follow in his footsteps which just wasn’t nor is it in the books. I always wanted to know more about everything which is something he was never led to do hence not able to teach. I guess the one main thing I learned from him is to use my imagination. He could look at a piece of wood and not see it as it is, but see it as it could be or what it could be incorporated into to achieve a personal goal. I, on the other hand, have never confined myself to just wood but carried the things he did manage to teach into just about everything I do. He taught that in order to build a house, one had to view it from the roof down. In other words, see the end result in my head before it’s even applied to paper.
My father probably was a genius, but he died when I was seven years old, so I didn't get many chances to learn from him. He was a mechanical engineer and Jack of All trades, similar to @Frank Sanoica, the electrical engineer and master of many things.
@Don Alaska My own father quit school after the 8th. grade, began an apprenticeship as a Tool & Die Maker, took mechanical drawing classes nights, made a good living, despised labor unions, working his entire life non-union, and getting prevailing union "scale", a fact he promoted as showing the importance of personal ability over union-supported incompetence. He feared I would follow in his footsteps if he allowed my purchase of a small metal-turning lathe at about age 12, but relented, and guided me through the rigors of tool bit grinding, cutting angles and speeds, materials machinable. Soon, I bought a larger lathe, perhaps at 14 or 15, which to this day serves me well. I use it to make any number of unusual parts, such as this combination lock for my gun safe:
Oh my goodness, where to start. My dad was my hero; best dad in the world. When I got my driver's license at 16, he advised me that I could not drive the car until I could change a flat tire by myself. After a few frustrating training sessions I finally managed to git'er dun. In all these years I have never had to use my tire-changing skill. (Knock wood) Then there was the time (as a teenager) I was going on a date and was wearing a sundress with spaghetti straps. My parents were having a BBQ with friends in the back yard so when I stepped outside with my date to let them know we were leaving, daddy sent me back inside to change my clothes. Biggest humiliation of my teen years, haha. How I miss you, Daddy. You are always with me, though.
I butted heads with my dad as far back as I can remember until I enlisted in the army. I didn't realize I'd learned a thing from my dad until I got a fanmily of my own and asddled with some responsibility. Dad couldn't read or write but he was good at numbers. He said, "debt is our worst enemy. if you can't manage your affairs, it will worry you , wear on you, get you down. Live on what you earn. If you want more, figure out a way to earn more." Maybe he wasn't totally right but I've always been a little bit hesitate to take on debt, especially if I had some. So whether he was right or wrong I've always lived on what I made, driving a used car instead of new, an older house or a smaller house with a small mortgage. We've lived pretty well and it has made retirement so much better. But that's not all I learned. I've learned most of butting heads was my fault and stubbornness instead of his and I carry some regrets there.
"...And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me, he'd grown up just like me. My boy was just like me''
I learned some funny songs from my Dad, Like "Bill Grogan's Goat" and "Halleluah, I'm a Bum". I also learned to pick my nose with my thumb!
My father probably thought long and hard about what to say to me when he called me on the day before my 21st birthday because he was an absent parent. He wouldn't have called if he hadn't been prompted by an older cousin that he should call me. I didn't have 'daddy issues' but I did wonder a lot about him as I grew up and the only memory that I treasured was when I was a very, very young child crawling up into his arms on a visit at a relative's house.
My dad was all about fair and right. He also taught us to not talk about, provoke or agitate people or stir up trouble. And to defend ourselves. He was well read and I was always amazed at how current and up-to-date he was on everything. He had 4 kids - 2 sons and 2 daughters and he made each one of us feel like we were the world to him. It was mutual.
My fathers Mantra was "Live your life in an open and upright manner" . He was both the devil and and hero. He was abusive as hell. Had no temper control and would beat us kids unmercifully Yet he was nurturing and caring. He taught us to hunt fish,work,play. As we got ole enough he would take each one of us to climb Mt. MArcy, the highest peak in NY. I really don't know why, he somehow considered that a right of passage.. He rarely left the house without taking at least one of the six of us with him. I can remember spending hours at a gun shop a friend of his owned that he smithed for. The scent of Hoppes #9 is in my DNA! He is now 90, he hikes,he canoes, he drives,he indulges his favorite hobby of chasing trains. I can only hope to have a tenth of his vitality if I live that long!
I learned kindness and generosity from my Daddy. No person in need was ever sent away from his and Mama's door. We didn't always have a lot to share but somehow they managed to share what little we had. But if the person was able to work, they were expected to do their share of work on the farm.