Well, Bobby, not everyone wants to be, or has to be, open minded, like you are. There are many folks who don't like Strip Clubs, Tattoo Parlors, people who love saying the "F" word and/or the Lord's name in vain. We are like that. There are those that will only be friends with folks in their class and/or income level. I have been put down many, many times for having been involved with rodeo. As far as "faults" goes..........you said it yourself, those dang career politicians. You find fault with them.
It is not a matter of being “open minded”. I hate evil in all forms but to say that I hate the people who do evil is non-negotiable. I have a hard enough time judging myself without trying to judge why another person does what he or she does. Ya know, when I was street preaching in Phoenix, there were quite a few “evil doers” who most people would stay away from but just because between myself and those like me were willing to listen and talk to those individuals, lives were changed. You can’t be an example of goodness if you’re not good to others. And, it would seem that I am in good company when it comes to career politicians. By all appearances, that Jesus didn’t like them either.
Not speaking specifically to anything said here, but on a more general basis, I don't understand why it should be difficult to carry on a conversation with someone. Sometimes, that's all they're looking for. They might bring up a topic that doesn't particularly interest you, but it might not interest them a great deal either. Just as people struggling for a topic might discuss the weather when there's a storm coming, or when it's been dry for a long time, today's environment involves this virus and, since the media can't shut up about it, and won't shut up about it, at least until after the election, it would be reasonable to consider that this might something that could sustain a conversation. Whatever your views on this strange political virus we have, it's on everyone's minds. I drove from Seattle to Millinocket with my wife's brother, taking the northern route in the middle of the winter, and we managed to have a civil conversation the whole way, and this despite the fact that he's a Buddhist Christian palmreader who is one hundred percent in favor whatever the loony left might want to do. We talked politics, but there was no need to fight about it, and we talked about a lot of other things, and I was able to have a civil conversation with him the whole way without feeling that I had to compromise anything that I believed to be true. That's pretty easy to do in person but it doesn't work so well in social media. I think we both blocked one another on Facebook. In real life, I have had conversations with all sorts of people. But then, I am interested in what interests them, even if it's not something that I had a prior interest in. That's a part of getting to know people, and I think it's helpful to get to know all sorts of people, not just those who share a common interest with me. I have a much easier time talking to loony leftists in real life than in a forum or on Facebook, where everything just turns into an argument. In real life, I know that there are people who are actually voting for Joe Biden, and I am curious as to what might have gone so terribly wrong in their lives to bring them to this place. In social media, people act as if it's some kind of an insult to offer an honest opinion. Politics aside, several of the interests that I hold today weren't something that I was particularly interested in until someone else sold me on it. But even if I don't adopt something as my own, it's helpful to know what other people are interested in and why.
I can see from your response that you have turned it all around to focus on your annoyance with your SIL's questions and that nothing that I have written has opened your mind to even consider the suggestions. So I'm out-ty.
I don't think, note the words "don't think", I have a problem carrying on a conversation with someone. But, yes, a "but", even you know how difficult of a time I have on this forum since nobody on here has an interest in horses, livestock, rodeo, farming, ranching and so on. Even talking about mountain wildlife wouldn't cut it on this forum. I'm not about to start talking to a biker about farming/ranching. Now, the conversation would be fine if I owned, or had owned, a Harley and knew other bikers.
Well, what else is there to focus on??? This thread was about being naïve. Perhaps you, and some others here, should either read, or re-read, what Gloria wrote. IOW, Gloria stated the SIL is an adult and can find answers to her questions..........if she chose to. The SIL is not, and I repeat, "is not", a child.
Uh Cody. If you really think about it, that’s not true. Since my wife probably knows more about ranching and horses than most, she has asked you about your horses on a couple of occasions and didn’t get an answer. She’s even tried to converse with you about the rodeo associations and you threw out a sentence and ran. There are people here who were raised on a farm and one new member uh....Miller (can’t remember her first name) is still on a farm and if she wrote that she went out and threw some shoes on horse today, I’d believe her. Not one person is against you for your rodeo experience or what you like to wear. But, just as you discredit your SIL for continually asking questions, you harp on the same things over and over. You want to be the star of the show but so many people here know a lot more than you give them credit for so you start getting nasty with folks when they do try to make some sort of conversation and then yes, all of Hades breaks loose. Then it’s “my wife says” and “my wife said” stuff instead of committing to your own opinion. The truth of the matter is that you’re not arrogant because you do not have anything to be arrogant about. You’re bullheaded and you enjoy arguing and if it weren’t for this forum and the fence post out front of your house you wouldn’t have anyone or anything to argue with. Matter of fact, I’ll be like @Von Jones. See ya.
Having spoken to many bikers, that's not all they're interested in and a lot of farmers and ranchers have interests outside of farming and ranching. People aren't generally that easy to pin down.
I don't know. I do a thread about being naïve and how my SIL is that way and I've got some knocks about it. I really don't see any replies saying, "Gloria, what the heck are you thinking?" Certain personalities can really bug me, just as I'm sure that there are those on this forum that know people that get bugged by certain personalities. The SIL really doesn't understand, or even likes, my personality and, I'm sure, sometimes wonder "how could my sister marry someone like him?" Heck, I remember telling a young lady, that was in the pool at our last apt. complex "my wife has a Princess Leia costume, but I told her she looks more like Princess Leia's mother in it". The young lady said to me, "that sounds like a nasty thing to say about your wife." I said, "actually, she thought what I said was very funny and laughed. Then, she said "I probably do"
I insult my wife all the time, as she does me. But when I insult her and there's just the two of us in the room, it's a joke. When I insult her in front of someone else, it's not always taken that way. I insult here her in the forum sometimes just to punish her for not coming here more often.
I think that it is wonderful that you and @Michelle Anderson can have that kind of relationship, and both understand that it is just joking. I have had friends who do that, too, and they are comfortable with it. I have so little self-confidence that it would devastate me to live like that. I am so happy that Bobby understands this fragility in me, and he goes out of his way to support me and uplift me in every way that he can, and I can’t say how much that his care and concern means to me. After having lived many years with an angry, abusive husband, where nothing was ever a joke, it is just hard for me to handle it, and know it is a joke sometimes. If someone talked to me like Cody did with his wife, I would have been in the bedroom crying, and thought it was a slam; and, knowing that, Bobby is so very careful with my feelings. We are all different, and what works for one person does not work at all for other people. The SIL might just be someone who needs more compassion and understanding, as Ken mentioned, she needs to have a conversation and is trying hard to do that.