Newly Diagnosed And Frankly, It's Scary

Discussion in 'Health & Wellness' started by Beth Gallagher, Jan 30, 2021.

  1. Hedi Mitchell

    Hedi Mitchell Supreme Member
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    Hey knock off that damn doom and gloom crap... leave that for another thread. This about
    Beth and what she is going through and helping her try and overcome anxiety and stress.
    That is what You would want if it were you. See told you I should shut up :rolleyes:
     
    #646
  2. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    Probably true. But women with dense breast tissue often have tumors missed because the tumors are so well "cloaked" by the tissue...so a combination of factors lead to a missed diagnosis.
     
    #647
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  3. Don Alaska

    Don Alaska Supreme Member
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    Right. The dense tissue is why mammograms are not recommended for young women unless there is a family risk, or elevated risk due to some other cause, but mammograms still get misread in women for which there is no real excuse, although the patient may be given that as an excuse. Ladies are pleased to be told that they have the breasts of a younger woman to explain the misdiagnosis.
     
    #648
  4. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    Your posts have made me more aware and I do more careful exams nightly. Thank you for your informative post.
     
    #649
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  5. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    I'm glad you are keeping tabs on your body, Faye. I know that you are well aware that the two biggest risk factors for breast cancer are 1) having breasts and 2) aging. I was not familiar with IBC when I noticed the pink spot on my breast, but I instinctively KNEW it was going to be trouble. I gave it a week to see if it would change color like a bruise, but it didn't. (Since chemo, that original pink spot is totally gone.) Some women with IBC have much worse symptoms and they grow worse almost by the hour... it can be extremely aggressive.
     
    #650
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  6. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    [​IMG] (No, you should not shut up.)
     
    #651
  7. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    @Beth Gallagher, I suspect that you don't always feel as strong as you project, but I admire the way that you are handling this. When I first got cancer, I bought a huge book that discussed the cancer and the options for treatment that might be available, but when I began looking through the treatments, they were all horrible, and I couldn't bring myself to read any more of it. Instead, I chose to go with radiation only because the others involved a urinary catheter, which I wanted no part of but, as it turned out, the one I chose required a urinary catheter too, which turned out to be the only part of the treatment that was truly horrible, since all of the other effects of the radiation treatment didn't show themselves under a few months after the treatments were over.

    I didn't want to talk about cancer, and I didn't want my wife to tell anyone that I had cancer, although she did anyhow. A few close friends, you know how it is, and the whole town knew within a week.

    I was very tempted to forego all treatment and just pretend that I didn't have cancer. Had I been single, I probably would have done that. If I were single, I probably wouldn't have seen a doctor to begin with.
     
    #652
  8. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    Ken, you know as well as I how devastating "those words" are, and the emotions that go along with them. The first few weeks I was in such a mental panic and truly suffering the worst anxiety I could ever imagine. My mortality was staring me in the face and it was a hard look to handle. Looking back I'm not sure if my terror was more about the treatment I was facing, or the prospect of dying. I didn't even feel sick, so what the heck??

    It took me a week to tell our kids; that was very difficult--then my sister and the rest of the family. I'll say that you find out who your real friends are when the rubber hits the road. After a few people knew, I discovered that I really don't give a damn who knows.

    I was the same as you, wanting to know everything and feeling lost in the never-ending acronyms of cancer. Until I was diagnosed, I thought "breast cancer" was a single disease... I had no clue that there are literally hundreds of kinds with all types of variables. All I saw was the devastating statistics for IBC patients, which put me into a tailspin. My doctor told me to stop reading and focus on one thing; that I am an individual and not a statistic. They can make predictions all day long but there's no accounting for a person's own healing ability and the occasional miracle.

    I still have meltdowns, crying and carrying on, from fear and from resentment. I DON'T WANT THIS. (wah... so unfair, yadda-yadda, why me??) But thankfully for the most part I actually feel OK and it isn't on my mind 24x7. This second chemo has pretty much shown me who's boss, I won't lie. It's hard. But life goes on and I want it to be as normal as possible, for as long as possible.

    I didn't know what to expect when I started this thread, but I have been blown away by the kindness from all of you. Allow me to say that I am very glad that you went to a doctor, and glad that you had treatment. You have a lot more living to do.
     
    #653
  9. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    Yes, and also having small breasts doesn't give me a free pass or even lower the odds. My Oncologist made that clear. One of my friend's long-time friends had her arm go numb and rushed in to find out she had a brain tumor that had metastasized from IBC that she didn't know she had. It was so fast-growing she died 20 days later even though they removed the brain tumor successfully. Scary stuff and so glad you found the pink spot when you did. I never knew about pink spots on the breast as an indicator of IBC until you mentioned it.
     
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  10. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    The best thing anyone can do for themself is to know their own body. Any change should be noted and not ignored. There are so many kinds of BC, and a few that present with no lump or physical changes at all. They are stealthy and usually not found until they have already metastasized somewhere in the body. Breast cancer in the breast is not fatal; metastatic breast cancer kills.

    I have always said that my father died of colon cancer, but truth be told, he did not. He had melanoma that metastasized to his colon and several other organs. So he died from melanoma, though I only realized that recently.
     
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  11. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    I spent a couple of days at our camp by myself before I told anyone.
     
    #656
  12. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    I noticed the pink spot in mid-December but I didn't mention it to anyone until the day after Christmas. I didn't want a bunch of long faces for the holiday. I didn't even tell my husband. Once it's "out there," it's real.
     
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  13. Don Alaska

    Don Alaska Supreme Member
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    I told my wife about your experience with ice cream. She said her best friend some years ago who died of MBC loved her tapioca pudding while she was on chemo. It might be another option that you or hubby could easily make yourself, although the cool might feel more important in Houston that it does here.
     
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  14. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    Good idea, Don. I love tapioca pudding.
     
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  15. Lulu Moppet

    Lulu Moppet Veteran Member
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    Oh, no no Beth you're not the wimp, I am. I saw your post on how you are suffering. I immediately answered it but then erased it. I was at a loss on how to express myself to you. But...............I've learned the hard way that it's usually better to say something to show support then hide and say nothing at all.

    You've been on my mind a lot since Tuesday. I'm so sorry you have to endure this. All I can do though is show the support & love I feel in my heart for you. (((Beth)))
     
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