Today we are going to my nieces house -first time ever. To of all things celebrate a one years old BD. Can you say - very well off We are going simply because I cannot keep putting people off because of the virus controversy. There are to be only ten of us, family members. One travels all over the US.I am a bit anxious. The other reason to go is my brother and his wife will be there, My brother has dementia aka Alzheimer's. Not sure how he is really doing, so will be glad t see him first hand. Hope to talk to my SIL about all this when he is out of ear range. It will be nice to get out and about a bit. Last week we took a trip but turned into a bad idea for many reasons so we came back home. We intended to celebrate our 30 year anniversary with the trip. Today is our anniversary and like most of the others will remain quiet and just reminisce between us both. I am awake enough to realize now, I am babbling about nothing in particular, so will close by saying hope everyone has a good day.
I suppose it depends on how our families grew up. My family was not close, I can't remember my mom ever telling me she loved me or even hugged me, we as a family just did not do that type of thing. My family is mostly gone by death, we never really kept in touch, I have not heard from my brother in over 5 years, the same with my sister yet when my sister does see me next she is going to say how much she loves me like always which irritates the heck out of me, it is like the 5 years since she saw or talked to me never existed, she just picks up where we left off. Families are a pain but what we gonna do we are stuck with them.
The only close family I have is my brother, his wife and my nephew. The rest are cousins who only meet when there is a death in the family. Most others are moved away or dead. My brother, after a lifetime of getting along, became offended by something I said and went off the deep end and we have been on the outs for five years. It’s deeper than that though I believe. He’s had neighbor problems; marriage problems and was always a hot-head anyway, so he’s been boozing and perhaps overusing Xanax and it has affected his personality. Some things you have no control over, so you just have to make do.
Apparently the same thing has happened to me with my older sister. A month or so ago we were talking on the phone and I had a meltdown because I was in a chemo fog and feeling like death warmed over. I guess I didn't realize that when she asked how I was doing, the only acceptable answer was "fine." She didn't give a damn about how I'm doing and actually got pissy with me for saying how bad I felt. She advised me that I "am not the only woman to go through this," so I ended the call abruptly. Thanks, Sis! Appreciate the support! Anyway, I haven't heard from her since so I suppose she's got her ass on her shoulder, as my grandpa used to say.
My original family was pretty close, as far as getting along with one another, but I have lived more than a thousand miles away from my siblings for most of my life so we don't see one another often. This is my fault, of course. I'm the one who moved from Michigan to California, and then to Texas and Maine, while my brothers are all still in the UP of Michigan. My mother died when I was thirteen, and my father remarried when I was in my senior year in high school, so I never really got to know my half brothers and sisters very well. I am more familiar with my step-sister than my half-siblings because I was still living at home for several months after my dad remarried. She was much younger than me, but we've been in touch off and on throughout the years. One of my half brothers came out to visit me here a few years back, bringing his wife and daughter, and that was nice, as I hadn't seen him since he was a baby. From my dad's original family, I have four older brothers and one younger, and we're all still alive, although our parents are gone.
WOW! You hit the nail on the head! Yes, absolutely we need to be around others for our wellbeing. I am very happy you spent time with your daughter. If I may ask, and please no need to answer, why was your husband less than thrilled? I am very fortunate as my young adult son lives with us. I would go absolutely crazy if I didn't see him for 4 months!
only because of the virus going around, and me with an auto immune issue, and a few other medical issues.
I haven't seen my Daughter is many years.Since I've been on my own,because I live in low income housing and have little to spare she has shunned me but not her Dad.That's who can get to what she wants when she wants it.We only had 1 child and I had such a blast with her when she was growing up,themed birthday parties,water parks.I was having as much fun as she was.But when she married and left home and her Dad decided that things were greener elsewhere and I ended up here in Government housing...not a sign of her but she does have requirements that must be met before she will visit.I must have a full time job,not have Aspergers (it embarrasses her)and not live in Government housing but realistically she knew I couldn't meet those so that speaks volumes.So I stopped begging years ago for her to come over and see me.We paid for her education to be a PSW and she lives about 5 miles from me.I have seen her in the hospital where she works in Emergency and I've said hello to her and her reply was,"Do I know you from somewhere, you're not familiar to me".I believe it was because people she worked with were around.But I've put everything about that in a box and put it in a closet(in my mind)because I couldn't deal with it anymore.But she is welcome here anytime.
@Julia Curtis - so sorry to hear that. Very unreasonable requests, and selfish on her part. I think it is great that you are moving on and creating a life of your own. Someday your daughter will regret her treatment of you.
I had to move forward,it was my Dad that kept telling me I would spiral down if I didn't.Thank's Hedi..