If all the pertinent facts and comparisons here are ignored, and I am simply asked could I, would I, live alone if confronted with that prospect, the answer is, of course, yes. Frank
LOL, yes Frank, but you might be like me. My gal-friend told me I was like a fly. When I'm "in" the house I want "out", when I'm out, I want in, LOL!!
I'm alone and single and let me tell you it's not so easy. I depend on my family for help getting my Mom around for she is housebound now. They say they'll help me and Mom, but they are not so willing you see to help me in other ways. So it's not easy being single and alone when you're older. I feel if you find someone who is willing to marry you get married for alone is not good, at all. I bus too and don't have a car at all, so I'm lucky that my relatives are willing to help my Mom. Being alone is very difficult, without siblings, without riches to help you, so I hope for a prince charming to rescue me and I'm just getting older, lol. I hope my situation changes soon, but I'm glad there is places like St. Francis elder care homes on Oahu.
I am happily married for 51 years. Cody you are stealing my green font! I know Denise well, and I just try to give her the best advise I can since she ASKED me for it. Denise is much more of an independent lady than I am. She's been alone since 97 by her own choice and if she asks me for dating advise I will give it to her. I don't think Denise should rush into a new relationship, but I myself might. We are all different people. Those on here who advised her not to rush into things might be like my mom who lived in a horrible marriage and LOVED living alone. Or the ones who had a great marriage might not have found the right guy again. Nothing wrong with being alone. I'd rather be alone than live with a person I didn't like. In that case I would love to be alone. My mom was sure happy alone. Happier than she ever was married to my dad. But Cody it's great that you (and myself) are happily married.
@Krissttina Isobe : I am truly sorry my remark sounded as though it should fit everyone; of course, it cannot, it's only for my own case, which at present could go either way. I fully recognize that given awhile, I too, will be unable to care entirely for myself. Frank
LOL, and another thing, there wasn't anything wrong with your "remark" Frank. Geez, you aren't always in the dog-house, you don't get to "always" be in dog-house, I want my turn or I ain't playin
*The fact is really quite unsettling isn't it to be alone and old, but if you research online you'll find lots of help for we Senior Citizen for when the time comes for what we need. Take care always!
Right on Linda, BUT, and that's a very big BUT, LOL!! You have to take into consideration the poor fellow who might have suffered horribly living with me, and, any fellow who might be headed for that in the future Love you, denise
I can't relate to what you are dealing with Krissttina, but I admire you greatly for doing what has to be done. I only hope that if I ever get to a point where I need to be as strong, I won't fail I hope you'll understand that for me, marrying someone that I don't love is out of the question. I would rather struggle all alone, in all the hardships that may come along in this world, than be with a bad match. And I do mean, for me as well as the fella. I would like to meet a good match, mutual adoration ya know Work together, play together (big emphasis on the latter) but until then, I am going to work on being content with my life as is, and make my little home, as homey as I can get it hugs, Denise
Wife wasn't very independent when I met her and that didn't bother me at all. She shared an apartment with her mom and relied on her mom and alarm clock to get her up in the morning for work. I do it now, along with two alarm clocks. She has told me numerous times, it gives her a "boost" in the morning when I get up with her. Been doing that since 2008. Sometimes when I get up, I will make her tuna salad or egg salad for her lunch and turn on both cell phones. And, unless it's raining outside, I will walk her to the vehicle, kiss her goodbye (unless she's somewhat sick), say "I love you" and watch her leave......waving "goodbye" as she leaves the apt. complex. As for me, I was divorced/single for 21 years and hated it for all 21 years. I missed wearing a wedding band and knew I could make the right lady a great husband. I was pretty independent, but was still very much "marriage minded". My first two marriages ended in an annulment and divorce.........from the same woman, but not my choice. Yes, "ex" and I married twice. Unfortunately, I was looking more at sex and "looks" back then than actual love. I spent that 21 years almost constantly searching for "Mrs. Right", by placing Personal Ads, talking in an online Western/Cowboy forum, meeting women in nightclubs and Square Dancing. Met some women, but nothing worked out, UNTIL I placed a Personal Ad in a local magazine in Feb. 2000 and my wife answered it. The first time we met/I seen her, I swear Cupid really nailed both of us with arrows. Everything was there.......interests, clothing and more interests. Like we often say, "A match made by God!" Even today, she will tell people that one of the reasons she married me is my cooking skills (LOL). For me, it was her personality, Christian belief and just a nice, loving, caring woman. Heck, with all of that, and the interests we shared, there was no way I was going to find better. And, this Thursday it will be 15 yrs. of a very nice marriage (except for the little squabble at times). Sorry for getting carried away here. Just some things to show everyone, that with the RIGHT person, marriage can be/is wonderful!
And, BTW, the worst of times for some divorce/widows/widowers is Valentine's Day, Christmas and New Years Eve. Before I met my wife, Christmas was the only one that I really liked because of the religious aspect of it (Birth of Christ, but ) other than that........"Bah, Humbug" and the same statement went for Valentine's Day and New Years Eve. Now, all holidays and special days are fabulous for me!
I'm not disagreeing with you Cody, marriage can be wonderful...mine was. We were very different too, didn't have too many things in common but for whatever reason, it worked. I went basically from living at home to living with my husband til he died in 2004. Then I met someone in 2005 and he left Ohio and moved in with me in California til about 2008. We split and he moved back to Ohio for about a year, then he begged me to let him back...he loved me, missed me, etc., against my better judgement I let him come back. A year later he left again. We talked on the phone though every day and he would come and visit me sometimes for a week and do all my little repairs that needed done. Then one year we had a big fight and don't talk for a long time. Now he is calling me again. In the year he was gone I dated a few men and was getting along well with one but I dumped him when I took my ex back. I tried to call him after J. Left but I found out he had died. He was 57, in great shape, a golfer. Walked 5 miles every day on his treadmill and that's where he died according to his daughter. I'll be 65 next month and in all those years I've spent 5 years max alone. In not tired of it yet.