Just to let all of you know, the SIL messaged us last night saying: "After thinking about it and looking in my mirror twice, once with my hair up and again with it down, it does look better down. I will now wear it more down than up. I'm sorry for saying anything bad concerning your suggestion. Thanks for letting me know. Love you both!" So, the suggestion we told her ended up turning out very good. Just remember, people suggest things to each other every day. No matter if it's a married couple, a family member or just a friend, it is done. A boss/manager/supervisor can suggest things to a worker or co-worker-to-co-worker suggestions.
Cody, people are sensitive now all of us are. Good thing you didn't tell her if she wanted to look like a hag, it's her prerogative. Thats what I'd expect your reply to be, knowing you. I would put up the song, but everyone doesn't have my good taste for music. Come to think of it, think I'll put it up anyway.
Let me explain it this way to you Marie: A lot of the way my SIL is, is due to problems she had with her deceased husband, like using their desktop computer and, somehow/someway, messing it up. He'd fix it, but she'd just mess something up again when she got on it. He had taught her the basics of how to use it, but nothing helped. When she was young, she wanted to marry a Pastor and that's what her husband was. But, after getting a church, and then losing it to a newer church and his personality, their marriage started going down hill. He didn't like her spending money to travel, but she did it anyway. When he got sick, he didn't want her to care for him and she said to us "I'm a teacher, not a nurse". So, the feelings were mutual. He moved out of her condo (she bought, not both of them) and got his own apartment that had a check-in nurse. But, as he got sicker, she let him move back into her place. In fact, when he moved out, she took off her wedding set. No legal separation or nothing. After he died, due to his sickness, she said to wife and I "I'm free and am going to love it. Nobody is going to tell me what to do, and not do, anymore" and she was very serious. So, what wife and I suggested, was just that, a suggestion...........absolutely nothing else. IOW, I've heard of "hard-headed people" and she completely fits the bill. Very nice lady, but.........
Cody looks like she may be starting to listen to others suggesting's and opinions, even if only about her hair. Thats a start.
When she feels like it. We are now like her younger brother (also my wife's brother), we just don't talk to her that much anymore. At home, she can get extremely bored. Actually, sometimes, I think she thinks that I'm stopping her younger sister (my wife) from talking to her, but even my wife gets tired of talking to her. Or, as I always say, "not all families get along!"