Aging Alone

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Beth Gallagher, Sep 20, 2022.

  1. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    Not yet but I can guarantee results in just 30 days. All you have to do is send me your credit card number & security code. :)
     
    #166
  2. Joy Martin

    Joy Martin Veteran Member
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    My radio is my companion, NPR has some good programming on weekends...I've accumulated to "what is" and accept me alone....
     
    #167
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  3. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    I guess I was still hoping for more from what life I have left than sitting on the front porch hugging a radio and waving my cane at passing children, hoping everyone is as miserable as I am and telling them that it's one's only option.

    I'll admit I was facing a future of little else myself, but I've come to expect more.
     
    #168
  4. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    I came across this for Saturday night from 7:30PM to 10:00:
    It sounds a lot like the sort of thing suggested above, it's in a good cause, and I haven't gone to live comedy in a while. I just hope they have accommodation for those attending solo. I have an eerie feeling it might be a Table 9 of mutants like in one scene of that hilarious romcom "The Wedding Singer."

     
    #169
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  5. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I was gonna suggest you find something different to do, just to break the cycle. I've gone out to shows and events by myself nearly my entire adult life...you'll be fine. If you're really concerned, call and ask if they accommodate parties of one.
     
    #170
  6. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    I have never felt comfortable going out alone, even to eat. What I need is a big, strong, handsome man to go with me. Preferably one who is filthy rich and wants to spend it all on me. :D
     
    #171
  7. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I've commented before that dining alone is a different experience. The waitstaff sometimes get real chatty when there's only one person at the table.
     
    #172
  8. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    People tell me there are lots of nice women out there. I suspect that most of these nice women simply don't go out to places a guy might think he could meet some.
     
    #173
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  9. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    Check out the comment I made regarding Meetup.com on your other thread. Go do something that you enjoy with a group of like-minded people in a casual manner. Just about everyone there is in the same boat you are.

    Common interests are what you seek
    [​IMG]
     
    #174
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  10. Joy Martin

    Joy Martin Veteran Member
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    Stuff Happens, and I NEVER thought I'd be so damaged and all from the frigging hip replacement which I did to be better...............and with alll the structure loss my colon is a mess and I work constantly for Happy BM's...yes I know too much info, but true.....
     
    #175
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  11. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    Thanks John, but I did that. I found:

    Feminist group discussion of "herstory" - all young women
    MGTOW group - all guys
    Computer security group - all guys
    Atheist group
    Women's dance class
    Board gamers' group - all guys
    New restaurant "tryout" event - all very young women plus 1 young guy
    Women's black history event - far out of town
    Music and beer event - all young people
    Shamanism group - online event, all young women
    Gay Atheist love group
    Spiritualism Zoom meeting
    Autistic support group

    Perhaps later on there might be something else though.
     
    #176
  12. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    Gosh Joy, sorry to hear that.
     
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  13. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I think that it is just hard being a senior, whether we are alone or married.
    Back when we were working, there were people in our life every day, at least for most of us, and now that we are mostly at home every day, I never see or talk to anyone, and I really miss just having a friend to do things with.
    My friend that I did go places with moved in with her daughter, because it was getting hard for her to get around and take care of herself, and they do not live anywhere near here, so I never see Evelyn anymore, and I miss her.

    The people who live around us are Hispanic, and do not speak English, and the last two family members that i used to visit with online have both died in the last couple of years.
    Being part of the forum is about my only communication with people nowdays, and I have no real way to change that.
    After reading @Jacob Petersheim ’s findings from MeetUp, that does not sound hopeful either, and I looked on Craigslist before and didn’t find much there either.
    I am not sure what the answer is, or if there is even an answer.
     
    #178
  14. Jacob Petersheim

    Jacob Petersheim Very Well-Known Member
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    I think that's about it.

    The "senior market" for activities and events just hasn't been recognized as a possible profit center for those who might otherwise invest in it. The older of us do have a few more things like senior centers that aged along with them, but even many of those rely on government support to really exist at all.

    Perhaps instead most of the investment has gone into things like pricey senior communities and various levels of health-supporting residences. There they can charge high prices as well as get government money at the same time.

    I can imagine things like a "museum and lecture hall" that has exhibits and brings in speakers on nostalgic topics. It could easily have a coffee and juice bar with healthy snacks and islands of casual seating in an area for socializing.

    Or a "hub" for bus outings that arranges events in the area (take the bus or drive yourself) so individuals and couples might show up, meet new friends, and head to a guided tour of a museum, open house at a greenhouse, a lecture, a winery, a 4-H fair, planetarium show, music, comedy, dancing, etc. targeting older people.

    Those are simple examples of things that can make use of facilities that may already exist. The money to be made would be from fees on top of the facilities' fees to organize, lead tours, engage speakers, advertise, and such.
     
    #179
  15. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I think that an option for some seniors, and one that I would do if I could, is to live in one of the senior apartments, where they have structured entertainment for people living there.
    Most of those apartments have a gathering area for birthday celebrations, and other community-involved entertainment, a small theater for movies, and exercise facilities, as well, all right on site at the apartments.
    A person can choose as much or as little involvement with other people as they want to. People that have pets often walk their dogs together, or the smokers all gather outside for their cigarettes and chat session.
    People come and go, unlike a nursing home , so there would be new people to meet from time to time, too.

    Not everyone wants to live in an apartment, but I believe that I would be quite happy in one where everyone else was a senior and I could spend time with friends if I wanted to do that, and still had my own apartment where I could have privacy.
    Another alternative could be a senior mobile home park, which would be an area where people could still live independnatly, but be around other seniors and make friends to do things with together.

    I think that we do have community outings here in Huntsville. I remember seeing advertisements for trips though the historical part of town, and maybe even some kind of “ghost tours” or something like that, which would be a lot of fun to do.
    My daughter and i walked through the historical area when I first moved out here, and we had a lot of fun doing that; but she is working in the Netherlands now, so going on any of the local tours is out for me.
     
    #180
    Last edited: Feb 24, 2024

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