By Jim and Cathy Burns · June 2, 2021 "Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ. –Philippians 1:6" "We have often said publicly that we have a high-maintenance marriage. We have been married for over thirty-five years, and we feel a bit like how Billy Graham described his fifty-four year marriage: “Ruth and I are happily incompatible.” Cathy and I wouldn’t trade our relationship for anything, but it hasn’t always been easy. It’s kind of like what Rocky Balboa said to his wife in the famous movie Rocky: “I got gaps; you got gaps; we fill each other’s gaps.” (READ MORE)
Ok, but just wondering...........what has this thread got to do with Faith & Religion? Anyway, I've always thought of a "high-maintenance marriage" as one where the husband has a very, very good salary and his wife loves to spend money. Then again, that would probably be under "high-maintenance wife" or "trophy wife". If the marriage is "high-maintenance", I would think that both, husband and wife, love spending money and buying everything brand new. That would mean never going to the Goodwill, Salvation Army or any Thrift stores. And, only shopping at high-end stores, like Macy's and Saks Fifth Avenue.
Get your head out of your wallet for once, Cody and use your brains. Did you read the link Joe posted? That would answer your questions.
Sorry, BUT, "high-maintenance" to me, and what I've been told, was about money. When "high-maintenance" is stated, faith and religion don't come into view. In fact, Ruby, I just asked my SIL (wife's sister) who was (deceased now) married to a Master Degree Theology Pastor and she told me that "high-maintenance" to her even meant either, or both, loved to spend money. But, if the thread isn't meant to be about money, so be it. IOW, Ruby..........everyone makes mistakes! LOL
Spending more time on your marriage is much harder than spending your money. The time we both spend, pays off in huge dividends that money can't begin to buy. "Here is our list of five things every couple can do to invest in their marriage. None of these are rocket science and they all take work. Our experience is that it is definitely worth it." Read Link
A 'comedy' of errors? (unexpected, not the primary thought when started?) The ones of faith in Scripture, examples provided for everyone of faith in Jesus, were not incompatible with each other. The ones in this and preceding generations who were/are/ pretending (actors on the stage of life, hypocrits) to be of faith are always incompatible with those of faith and with each other yes, even their own spouses.
@Cody Fousnaugh : "Pray. Couples who pray together, stay together. We have said before that without God’s presence in our marriage, we would probably not be married today. The odds would be against us. We like what Paul said: “I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13). That statement goes for marriage as well."
My parents ate together, and their union made 63 yrs. They did nothing else together,. made 3 children and it was very high maintenance for my mom. She prayed the rosary a lot.
What Makes Marriage Work? It's how you resolve conflict that matters most. "In pursuit of the truth about what tears a marriage apart or binds it together, I have found that much of the conventional wisdom--even among marital therapists--is either misguided or dead wrong. For example, some marital patterns that even professionals often take as a sign of a problem--such as having intense fights or avoiding conflict altogether--I have found can signify highly successful adjustments that will keep a couple together. Fighting, when it airs grievances and complaints, can be one of the healthiest things a couple can do for their relationship." "If there's one lesson I've learned in my years of research into marital relationships--having interviewed and studied more than 200 couples over 20 years--it is that a lasting marriage results from a couple's ability to resolve the conflicts that are inevitable in any relationship. Many couples tend to equate a low level of conflict with happiness and believe the claim "we never fight" is a sign of marital health. But I believe we grow in our relationships by reconciling our differences. That's how we become more loving people and truly experience the fruits of marriage." (READ MORE)
Living with another person for any length of time has got to be the toughest job. Many stick together and live quiet lives of desperation and many scream at each other. And many tune the other one out.
My mom probably had a lot of regrets but her times people stayed together, they made 63 yrs, as I see it my dad married his Mother.....mom took good care of Dad.....
Well, I think that some "higher voice" people, like myself, who have worked in loud-to-very loud environments, know how to talk over tv, air conditioning and other noises. My wife never worked around any loud noise, as in mostly office work. There are times that she thinks I'm yelling at her, but I'm simply talking over the tv, refrigerator noise or A/C-Heat noise. Can't turn everything off to say something. Then again, there are those that grow up with parents who indeed yell at each other quite often. Basically, incompatible, some people would say and don't want to do anything about the arguing being done. IOW, the "love/hate" relationship thing.
My parents were married 52 years.They may have been together a long time, but that means nothing to me. It as out of duty and fear for my mother, for my dad it was a form of power over her. This is the way I saw them, once grown. I doubt either would have agreed with my belief. They did not argue really . In their own way they loved each other. My 31 years with hubby has been good and we enjoy being around each other. Humor is the glue that binds us together
This is not about a marriage but on "older" couples keeping company. Just talked to an old friend who is my age, 6 months younger and about 12 yrs ago or so, she got hooked up a man she worked for and he was 90 at the time, so big age spread, she loved him and they lived together until he died at 93, then recently she's telling me she's hooked up with a guy 84 at her senior place and they have nothing in common, but like each other....so they hang out and talk and that's it...