Domestic Violence

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Kate Ellery, Jul 28, 2021.

  1. Kate Ellery

    Kate Ellery Supreme Member
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    Hope it’s ok to discus this subject @Yvonne Smith

    I live in a small town , well to be more correct I don’t live in the town at all I live 3 km away
    form our nearest town ..the area has about a population of about 4.000 so it’s a quiet country town where most people know each other either by sight or name .

    On Sunday while out walking I heard an ambulance which is unusual, it turns out a man in his 50’’ bashed his wife who was 37 within inches of her life ( she died yesterday ) I’m horrified something like this could or would happen in a small country town .
    I’ve been aware of DV most of life however the perpetrators seem to be getting more violent and in this case it appears to be Alcohol involved .
    The home is only a street away from us
     
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    Last edited: Jul 28, 2021
  2. Teresa Levitt

    Teresa Levitt Veteran Member
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    what a horrific thing to almost feel like you witnessed..bad nightmare....
    such cruel people are in this world...evil..purely

    hon..I am sorry you had this experience
     
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  3. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    This is a terrible problem, and it seems like it is worse nowadays, or maybe we just see it in public more often. Where we live, people go up and down the street, yelling and screaming at each other, and sometimes even getting into fights right in the middle of the road.
    This is probably not the same kind of thing as what you witnessed, @Kate Ellery ; because that happened in a nice neighborhood, and not one where we expect fights at all hours of the day and night, and police cars and ambulances along with the fights and gunshots.
    I grew up in a small, peaceful little town, and at least on the surface, everything seemed quiet and people got along; but I am sure that there were probably abusive people even back then, it just happened more behind closed doors, and people didn’t talk about it.
     
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  4. Kate Ellery

    Kate Ellery Supreme Member
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    I think it’s the shock of something like that occurring in our sleepy area where allot of the residents are retired .
    Each time we go walking we walked right past the house where the crime happened
     
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  5. Hedi Mitchell

    Hedi Mitchell Supreme Member
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    @Kate Ellery Sorry for you all, because now this will leave a bad memory in a peaceful neighborhood .
     
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  6. Don Alaska

    Don Alaska Supreme Member
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    I have read reports that the DV rate around the world has gone up dramatically during the past year due to the lockdowns and elevated drug and alcohol consumption. I once read a survey done by UCSD that 54% of DV is women against men, but the damage done by men against women is generally more serious. Men often don't go the the ER claiming that their girlfriend/wife beat them up. Women are more likely to report it now (where they didn't in the past) but often elect not to prosecute if a misdemeanor unless the woman's children are involved. Here in Alaska, any DV involving a weapon of any kind is automatically a felony. Once reported, it cannot be rescinded. An acquaintance once was angry with her husband because he wouldn't buy her new winter tires for her vehicle, so she slashed her own tires with a knife so her would have no option. As something of a joke, he reported her to the Troopers, who immediately began an investigation. His wife was then arrested as a violent domestic abuser. When the husband tried to withdraw the charges, he was told he could not, as it was a felony. The husband was an IT guy and the wife was nearing the end of her training in nursing school. She immediately become ineligible for any healthcare job in the state--and probably in most states. A sad story that came to mind with @Kate Ellerys story. The couple involved ended up leaving Alaska and I have no idea what became of them.
     
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  7. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Supreme Member
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    DV occurs daily in this area. Stabbings, beatings and shootings.
     
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  8. D'Ellyn Dottir

    D'Ellyn Dottir Very Well-Known Member
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    What a shock that must have been for you, @Kate Ellery . Such a sad situation.

    Many years ago I was invited to dinner at the home of a couple who seemed quite lovely. It was a wonderful friendly evening, with no more than the average amount of wine consumed, and I left thinking I had two new friends. Months later the husband shot his wife dead then killed himself. The motive never was determined.
     
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  9. Kate Ellery

    Kate Ellery Supreme Member
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    The lady involved died the day after she was flown to the city by helicopter ,her husband has been charged with murder, she was 37 years old ( he’s 59)
    The sad thing is a man I know from volunteering lives right a cross the road heard her screaming but no one wants to get involved in others business even when someone is being killed
    He apparently beat her with a walking stick. The husband is in prison till his next court date in Dec
     
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    Last edited: Jul 29, 2021

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