This would bother me also. I know what it's like to live in a house in a neighborhood and not "fit in" This other neighbor may have a bit of fear of these people and figures it's better to be friendly with them than be on their bad side. They sound like scary people. I do hope they leave soon and like you, feel sorry for the new buyers. But I hope they are at least decent people.
@Missy Lee, like several of the others here, I too would feel disappointed if a friend of mine didn't see just how much a situation or person was distressing me. I don't think my friends are obligated to defend me, and of course I know that many times they don't have same feelings as I do. So of course each of us are going to have friends that do not get olong with each other. But I know that I would be hurt if my friend went out of their way to befriend someone hurting me. Some people just can't deal with negative situations, and sometime they will go all out to assure that such happenings don't enter their lives. My husband was like that, but generally he didn't really see or understand that he was hurting someone he like or love until the damage was done. So it could be that your friendly neighbor just doesn't understand how much his actions are offending you. I would try to remember that everyone sees/has a different perspective of how they should handle a situation. So I recommend forgiving your friend, because it will minimize your stress, and your friendly neighbor will be around long after the rehabers, I hope the house under rehab is sold to nice family that you can watch grow real soon.
Lots of support here making me feel better. We all get those times where we doubt our actions so it's good to get other opinions Thank you everyone. A thumbs up to each and every one of you for putting things in perspective. I did try one more time to smooth things over only to be met with a crass and cruel retort. Time to shrug it off and move on and enjoy the friends I do have more now in my little neighborhood. Anyone want to volunteer to build me an 8 foot high fence.....both sides
I suppose I should first clarify one part of the subject by saying that the only friends I have are Jesus and my wife. All of those who might be likely candidates I keep at arms length simply because life seems simpler that way to me. That doesn't mean that there aren't people who I genuinely like, it just means that I do not like people so close that they become part of me. Thus far there have been some quite good answers to your dilemma @Missy Lee but please do allow me some latitude for my observation. There are a myriad of nice little quotes that give some insight as to what a friend is and we've all read them and even shed a small tear when we see the pictures of the big eyed children hugging or what have you so I won't quote them. The bottom line is that if you have a friend, that person is someone you can share with and depend on no matter what the situation might be. Does your friend fall into those categories? Now the question might be, does your friend have other friends you would not like? I wholly submit to you that that answer would be yes. It always is. And I also submit that you probably have other relationships that she/he would not approve of but the mainstay of it all is that you two have (if you two are indeed real friends) a bond and are linked by some sort of common denominator that shouldn't be able to be broken by other outside and mostly temporary matters. Now, as far as walking across your yard goes and the sequential dog pee, would it not be better to talk to your friend about creating the pathway for I am sure she should know by now how you feel about your yard. Or, are you not as close as you thought and that a conversation regarding people in your yard hasn't yet been brought up? If not, it's time for that conversation in order to quell anymore angst that it might cause you. A real friend would understand and a " not so much " friend might not. So far as the wayward temporary neighbor goes, if you call the city health department and whoever your city council member is complete with their building permit number I am sure there can be some easier solutions than straining your middle finger. Or........an arsonist might perhaps be of some small service......or probably not because that would just not be lady like.
Bobby I was not going to keep this thread going any longer but what you say does deserve a reply as you do bring up an interesting observation. The person is question was someone I thought I could count on for help if needed and indeed on one occasion he did help me out with a household problem when a storm blew my shed up in the air. Sitting and having pleasant conversation at times was the norm but he was not someone that I would confide something of a personal nature to. He describes himself as a Loner by choice and talks to no one else in the neighborhood except for a brief hello. And that is only if they say something first. Sad really and explains why he does not see any friendships other than superficial so I suppose he cannot understand the concept of one friend having another friends back. He also is unable to grasp that sometimes friends do have a falling out and then fall back in line. It's not always all or nothing. If he waves or says hello, that's fine, we can do the same but the nastiness in one final cutting remark set the tone for the future.
Hmmm, well now there is one single very basic thing that you have helped establish. Your friend is a "he". As a "he" there is absolutely no competition between a quasi relationship and things that go bang, whirrr, pop, and those sights such as shiny things, saws and hammers. He can rationalize the fascination all he wants but the truth is that we all are drawn like flies to horse poop when it comes to our toys and what can be done with them. There is just no comparison between humanity and a skil saw at work unless there is a real friendship at hand which explains the beeline from his yard through your yard and into the opposing neighbor's building project. (Women are prone to do the same thing when they see yard sales and pretty shoes.) When all is done and over with and the man drawing pheromones emitting from building tools is gone I am certain that he will come back to sanity.
@Bobby Cole has hit the nail on the head. If he explained this concept to the singles dating sites, he would then see a mass depletion of power tools by lonely women at the hardware stores for sure. Although, I just can't picture single men flooding ladies shoe stores or yard sales. This concept does explain a lot though. I use to wonder how my husband and three sons could dislike some fella in one breath, and then in the next be getting ready crawl under the hood of a his car or boat. They could bad mouth a guy, and praise his tools, all in the same sentence.
Contrary to popular belief, a man is not known by the friends he keeps but the tools he uses. And further, the way to a man's heart is not through his stomach but if you give a man a new cordless drill, he's yours for life.