How To Do A Thread Without Offending Someone?

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Cody Fousnaugh, Feb 13, 2019.

  1. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Why is it that there are those that are easily offended by a thread or reply and those that just take either in stride?

    Do we really, really have to watch what kind of thread we do or how we reply to a thread?

    A member replied to a thread, and I totally agreed with them, about how much the word "racism" is used today. If a person even mentions any race, the word "racism" is used. The same goes for the word, "discrimination" It seems like whenever a person doesn't get what they want, or hear what they want, the word "discrimination" is yelled out.
     
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    Last edited: Feb 13, 2019
  2. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
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    I think if you're polite and respectful, then there's no reason for people to take offence ( although many do)...I often say it's not what you write, but how people read it. if only people would first clarify the meaning of a post after they've read it before flying off the handle, there would be a lot less angst on forums!!

    That said, there's always people who spend their life being permanently offended at everything and anything...those people are ones to be ignored. ..
     
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  3. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Problem is, depending on the thread and/or reply, a person just can't be that polite and respectful. If an "attack" is going on, due to the thread and/or reply, that "polite and respectful" thing is...…….right out the door.

    People can easily, in person or on a forum, hear something or read something and take it further than what is meant.
     
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  4. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Here is an example, but not about a forum. This happened in person a few years ago:

    I was at our apt. complex pool, before my wife got home from work, and, somehow, I got into a small conversation, with a young lady, about Star Wars. I told her that my wife has a Princess Leia costume for Halloween and also told her "actually she looks more like Princess Leia's mother than Princess Leia", the young lady told me "that's an awful thing to say about your wife". I immediately said back to her, "actually my wife thought it was extremely funny when I said it and we both laughed". Instead of the young lady saying, with a smile, "oh, I'll be she loved you for saying that", she got upset. I left the pool area and later told my wife how this young lady felt and we both laughed out loud.
     
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  5. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    You shouldn't have to.
    1. Try not to be too offensive.
    2. Try not to be too easily offended.
    3. Play well with others.
    That's a tactic used by people who want their opinions to be the only ones allowed. Most people will back off after being accused of being a racist. It's the way the world is going these days, because it works, but this is not what is encouraged here. Others have simply been trained to be easily offended. Whereas being a victim used to be a sign of weakness, it is now being used to empower people. Everyone wants to be a victim. Even Obama, whose ancestors were never slaves in the United States, claimed victimhood.
     
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  6. Emma Smith

    Emma Smith Veteran Member
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    One thing that goes on in some forums - people gossip on the private message and private chat boards, then bring the attitudes into their replies, to impress the person(s) they've been gossiping with.

    When someone gets offended, it may not be the first time the person has done something to provoke them. And with passive-aggressive people, it can go on endlessly. They will deny everything.
     
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  7. Emma Smith

    Emma Smith Veteran Member
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    @Cody Fousnaugh I can understand your opinion of the conversation, you knowing your wife's reaction.
    Not all, but some women may have found it funny between the two of you, but not in a private conversation with a much younger woman.

    The young girl was talking to a much older man and the same conversation with a different type of man might have intended a different meaning - testing the waters.
     
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  8. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    One thing for sure, wife and I have a very, very humous side to us. That's why we can watch certain movies and tv shows. But, for those that don't have that kind of humous side to them, some threads and replies can definitely be annoying.

    I remember one time, a resident complimented us on our outside Christmas décor. When he looked at us and said "very nice", I said "yea, we know" with a smile. Guess he wanted the "thank you", not that. Wife got a kick out of what I said.
     
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  9. Lulu Moppet

    Lulu Moppet Veteran Member
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    What's wrong, Cody, are you the one who feels offended? Appears that might be so.
    [​IMG]
     
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  10. Lulu Moppet

    Lulu Moppet Veteran Member
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    Joking aside, Cody, I think it's wonderful you and your wife are so close and compatible.

    The young girl may have felt you were publicly dissing your wife behind her back. Agree w/Emma.
     
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  11. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Actually, I do this more often than I'd like to admit. Does it help me, well...…….
     
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  12. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
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    See , that's exactly why you could have caused offence. Your wife may have found it funny Cody, however it would clearly be construed by the person who was being complimentary as being rude...

    You could have just as easily tagged on a thank you......
     
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  13. Holly Saunders

    Holly Saunders Supreme Member
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    That's exactly my point. if you're being polite and respectful, regardless of the topic, and someone insists on attacking you regardless ..then you either respond in kind or take the high road, and ignore them completely!

    Nothing annoys people more than being ignored !!
     
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  14. Joe Riley

    Joe Riley Supreme Member
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    Cody, it seems you are always stirring the pot....even when its empty. This thread is a good example.
     
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  15. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    My wife said "thank you" after I said "yea, we know". She's an excellent "back up" for me.

    One time, I said to a lady here, "Every woman needs a man and every man needs a woman". She didn't like what I said...….."oh well", I thought.

    Another time, I had someone say to me, "you're a sarcastic little twerp, aren't you?" and I said "yep" and walked away smiling.
     
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