Manipulating A Family Member?

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Cody Fousnaugh, Feb 2, 2023.

  1. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Sometimes I truly think my wife's older sister thinks I'm doing this to my wife/her sister. Of course she doesn't realize, or know, that this isn't true at all. My wife doesn't want her sister to know this, but many, many things when I say "no" to her sister, that "no" comes from both of us and I'm not making her sister say "no".

    Does someone in your family think you are "manipulating" a family member? How do you handle that?
     
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  2. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Ok, what can a person do to convince a relative that you are not manipulating a family member?
     
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  3. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    If it is not true, Why bother?
     
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  4. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    One could back off.
     
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  5. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    I told my wife this morning, "it just irritates me that she could think that way". Then again, the SIL knows that her sister has changed since being married to me, and she definitely doesn't like the change. The SIL didn't like the guy my wife was married to before me. He smoked and drank a whole lot.

    In fact, the SIL wound up totally despising her husband before and after he passed away.
     
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  6. Krystal Shay

    Krystal Shay Very Well-Known Member
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    Maybe let your wife speak for herself.
     
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  7. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    She isn't the "confrontational" type. IOW, she doesn't want to hurt her sister's feelings. The relationship we have with this SIL is the main reason we would never move back to So California. Actually, when I met my wife, she was living with her mom in an apartment. I found out that she was planning on moving to southern Nevada and hadn't mentioned a thing to any family member.
     
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  8. Hedi Mitchell

    Hedi Mitchell Supreme Member
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    Stay away from irritating, nosey, borrowing, condescending, take pity on me, holier than thou, lying, cheating, no good for nothing people, including relatives. End of problem :D
     
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  9. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    She's not THAT bad! In fact, we just accepted her "Friend" request on Facebook. But, if she by chance says something neither of us like, I'll "Unfriend" her again. We "Friended" her because we put a Throwback Thursday picture of her on our Facebook page that is from many, many years ago.
     
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  10. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    And the narrative changes as responses roll in.

    3e8edb55d60528353c97a2e71d373f11--wise-words-to-read.jpg
     
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  11. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    She has a very bad cold, but only got one Covid19 vaccine and gets around a lot more people than we do.

    But, what I really want to know is.........does anyone in your family think that another family member is manipulating another family member. The "thinking" happens quite often within families.
     
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  12. Mary Robi

    Mary Robi Veteran Member
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    Since you have repeatedly expressed your disdain for this sister-in-law, why do you suddenly care what she thinks about you?
     
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  13. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    Please don't make us rewind, Mary, I am running low on popcorn. Cody just soften the narrative to say he and his wife have recently accepted the SILs friend request on Facebook. He has gone from being the manipulator to being the manipulated. :rolleyes:
     
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  14. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    No doubt. But they keep finding me...
     
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  15. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I've manipulated lots of family members...they just weren't related to me.
     
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