My step-parents didn't say that to me, because I didn't do any bad habits that my step-dad did. He was a heavy smoker of pipes and cussed quit a bit (even after church). Not the really bad words of today, but my step-mom would get upset with him when he'd use the Lord's name in vain. Now, from what I understand from reading, there are parents, and even grandparents, that have said this, "Do as I say, not as I do" to their kids/grandkids. When the teenagers, and younger, copy what their parents do or say, the parents can get upset. So many people will say "kids learn from their parents". But, then again, they might learn bad stuff from peers or other family members. Thoughts?
In psychology, this idea of kids learning from parents is a basic tenet of social conditioning. This is what forms the notion of cycles of abuse. And it's easily seen not just in families but in communities and cultures as well. But there is a corollary -- sometimes kids learn what NOT to do, how NOT to be from the dysfunctional examples set by parents. These are the kids that break the cycle of abuse, and often do so by "divorcing" their parents or other family members. And, it's also true that parents can be basically loving, caring, concerned, etc, and still not provide the type of parenting that a particular child may need due to a mismatch of personalities and the reality that parents tend to enforce global rules rather than tending to the individual needs of each child. It's not like there is parent education in school. And no one has to be taught, tested, and licensed before becoming parents -- although that and parallel lessons in how to be in a long term relationship could make for a better society, IMHO.
I got my habit of smoking cigarettes, even though I was a very light smoker, from the Navy. Two things would help a Sailor stay awake at sea, in the middle of the night, during an outdoor watch onboard a ship..........a cigarette and a cup of coffee or hot chocolate. Of course, this "day and age" of Sailors can be much more wild than in the late 60's/mid 70's ones.
Society comes into play here also. We live in a time of the most radical change that hasever came along from older and younger generations. Although it did start and grow from a few in our generation it mestastizized in this one into a whole new nation,culture. Anyone rememebr when Bob Dylan said all people over 30 should just die? Well why didn't he take his own advice and rop dead? I will say the man is among greatest song writers in the world.
I don't remember Bob Dylan saying that, Marie. I do remember "Don't trust anyone over 30," -- Jack Weinberg
I don't remember ever vocalizing "do as I say but not as I do," but when raising our children we made it clear that some things were "adult" and they would be free to make those choices when they were of age. We hoped that they would all learn by our example to be responsible adults, though it took a while and a few missteps for a couple of them to get it.
No he did say it at some kind of town hall meeting. I'll see if I can find it later on,it doesn't really matter he was young and dumb so we forgive him.Still like his songs.
I just looked for his comment about old peopel should dye and still can't find it. But I know he said it because hubby heard it too it was one of his rants that caame up on YT . So I ask hubby wonder how he feels now that he is twice that age. Not worth listening to all his speeches when he was young.