I'm sure you are right. I just wish I knew how to let go of my ex. I mean it isn't as if I haven't tried. Goodness knows I have dated plenty, but no other woman has even come close to taking her place. I always wanted to grow old together with my ex but it just wasn't my fate.
One of the things which bothers me about the breakup is that it is now way too late for any other relationship. At age 72, it is more likely that I will sprout wings and fly.
I wasn't sure if you knew your ex is still remarried @Eric Cook but if she is still married to another man of course I would not advise you to contact her, nor do I think she will be contacting you. But I do still think praying for her would be a really good idea for something may be going on that she needs prayers for. Pray also that God would set you free from any ties that still bind you to her also and to stop the dreams about her that are disturbing you so. Life is not over at 72 Eric and love can come at any age.
Eric Cook it is never to late to find someone to love. Seventy two is not old unless you think it is. I don't know the exact statistics but there are far more single female elders than male. Going to a dance at any senior center will bear that out. The problem seems to lie in the fact that you are still with your ex and only you can move on.
I suppose that in theory, love could be possible even at my age. For me, however, it is a matter of the emotional cost. The way I see things, a relationship must be based on trust, honesty and respect. To be perfectly honest, I have not found an abundance of that in romantic relationships. It is my personal experience that people talk a great talk about romance, but in reality they are not willing to give in return. For example: I am a chef, and I love to cook. I am more than happy to prepare nice meals for people BUT I expect the same in return. To me, food is love on a plate. I show my love by cooking. When I don't receive the same, I feel unloved.
Relationships are so difficult, that's for sure, no matter what source they are, friendship, relatives etc ......... The only relationship you can depend on entirely is the love and respect a pet gives you - unconditional love is what they give. I have only had two loves in my life that have shown 'true feelings for me' my husband and a dog from childhood The advice given to you by the caring people here has been sound Eric and worth consideration
Not meaning to sound sarcastic, but everybody says just "move on", but nobody can say how to do that. I'm serious. I have traveled around the globe, lived in 3 different countries, had a bunch of GF's over the years and I have hobbies such as cooking, playing chess, reading historical novels, etc. But the nagging memories and desire to be with her, continue unabated. It's a damn shame that when someone who you love deeply, says, "I'm leaving. I don't love you anymore", it does not instantly kill you, like a bullet to the heart.
@Eric Cook Exactly how I felt back in '76 when my wife much less pointedly said basically the same thing. I was devastated. We sold the house we had built, divvied up the spoils, and I continued on pursuing my Degree. My Mother, shocked when she heard, volunteered to come live with me, housekeeper she called it. I almost gave up on the schooling, only about 15 credit-hours away, but fortunately had a most inspiring Advisor. I thought my world had collapsed, but forced myself to live with the reality of it, like it or not. 40+ years, and still aching........ Frank
@Eric Cook - I agree the term 'move on' can be empty without expanding on it You have lost a cherished love which is no different to losing a loved one in the sense of passing over You have done much in your life so you haven't exactly given up, but nothing, so far, has filled the emptiness I hope you never give up and you do find that 'something'
Some folks say that I' a tough, ornery old guy. I was once bitten by a rattle snake. After 3 days of intense pain, the snake died.
Moving on and letting go is a one day at a time, step by step process...there's no real moving on without letting go either. There also will not be another love if you still are keeping your past locked in your heart, and won't let go of the memories of her either. There is only one I know who can help you move on and let go and heal the pain and wounds she left you with too...that would be our heavenly Father God.