Groan at will........ Lexophilia" is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish", or "to write with a broken pencil is pointless." A competition to see who can come up with the best lexophiles is held every year in an > undisclosed location. This year's winning submission is posted at the very end. .. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. .. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A. .. The batteries were given out free of charge. .. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail. .. A will is a dead giveaway. .. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. .. A boiled egg is hard to beat. .. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. .. Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. .. Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now. .. A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired. .. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. .. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered. .. He had a photographic memory which was never developed. .. When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye. .. Acupuncture is a jab well done. And the cream of the twisted crop: .. Those who get too big for their britches will be totally exposed in the end.
This reminds me of a list I have and forgot about. Its bee around a long time and is some what different, but I thought some of you might enjoy it. Washington Post's Style Invitational The Washington Post's Style Invitational asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some recent winners: Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. Tatyr: A lecherous Mr. Potato Head. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn't get it. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. Burglesque: A poorly planned break-in. (See: Watergate) Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like a serious bummer. Glibido: All talk and no action. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a$$hole.
Those are funny. Not sure I would say that lexophlia is underway there, though, so much as pun humor. It reminds me of a line my mother used to say a lot, and I still am not sure where it comes from: "words to me are a play thing!" Does anyone know?