Well, John, she is taking the day off tomorrow and stating that she is sick. Funny, she doesn't show/talk conflict with her sister when talking to her on the phone, only when she is talking to me or her brother about her sister. And, on top of the "who pays" question, our vehicle is now having a problem. We'll have to use her rental to go anywhere. Trust our vehicle to go to her hotel, but will have to let our vehicle set and use her rental. And, to a big point, there is nothing to do here in Loveland. SIL was here, for a two nights/1day in Sept 2020 and we took her different places, like to see our boat (sitting in storage), the lake we put it on and a Big-Box Sporting Goods Store. So, she's already been to the most interesting parts of this city. But, some way, some how, we'll find someplace to take her. Funny, we've already told her that the city isn't "tourist" spot, but.
My family is like that...almost everyone uses and gets used, and not in a "normal" way. I understand your sister making that move. I did a similar thing. Your wife got distance because the pressure to say "Yes" all the time would be unrelenting. It's tough to out-function your family. Lots and lots of guilt there.
So tell me again why here sister keeps coming back. Does she just not want your wife (or anyone) to escape the system? And tell me about that brother. That's interesting that I, too, had one stable (yet alcoholic) sibling I could confide in. I'm glad she has him.
Anyway, we will bring her to our apartment to see. She might be amazed to see all of the pictures we removed from the walls. I'd just tell her, "we told you we were moving! Have packed some things already and put into our storage unit". But, one thing for sure, won't show her my wife's Smith & Wesson 9mm. Show that, and ammunition it takes to her in 2020 and.........she freaked! Doesn't like firearms at all. She might be somewhat surprised when she sees our miniature farm/ranch setup on our counter. 5 foot 4 inches of livestock, farm equipment and cowboys.
That's one area where I would differ. I have one very liberal brother and I wished I had owned a Trump shirt because I would have worn it to his house. Someone else's weaknesses are not projected on me.
Well, my wife absolutely hates saying "no" to this sister and won't. I guess, saying it correctly, my wife is somewhat 2-faced concerning her sister. Talks to her one way and to me and her brother a different way. As far as the brother goes, he simply doesn't get along with my wife's sister that much at all. He tolerates her, at best. Basically, he doesn't get along with anyone in the family anymore. He doesn't want any of us to visit him in Florida. He refused an all-paid trip to Vegas last December, from my wife's sister. She told him that he could stay at her Time-Share, but with her there, that sure wasn't going to happen. He will talk to us on the phone, but will not my wife's sister. Only a text once in a while. Heck, I very seldom even talk to my half-brother anymore. Him and I have 100% different outlooks on most things and live a very, very different lifestyle.
No one said that all families get along and as a matter of fact, I do not doubt that siblings will talk behind each other’s back and kiss and hug when they meet. Heck, I’m sure that a majority of married couples sometimes have something to say about each other when their spouses aren’t within hearing distance. That said, at the end of the day, they know they love each other even when he throws his smelly socks on the floor for her to pick up and she leaves her makeup all over the bathroom sink area. But that isn’t the point is it Cody? As you pointed out in other threads, you are the boss and make the rules and your wife is the follower. What I’m really gathering here is that you have a problem with your wife spending money on her sister and losing a day of work which kinda rocks that “I’m the ruler” boat. The short version is to allow her do what she wants Cody. In the end, if she makes a mistake then be there for her as a good husband and not her prosecutor. If all does go well she’ll probably thank you for your understanding so no matter what, it’s a win-win for you.
I am NOT the boss! We are both in-charge of our marriage. We kid around, and note the words "kid around" that I am, then she is, but in truth, we both are. We make decisions together. True, she is a follower, but not all of the time. We do so many things together that some couples are amazed that we don't have any "my time" at all...........and, don't want it. I have told her a few times "I told you so" and she'd say back, "yes, I know", when we done something that she suggested and shouldn't have done. She doesn't say "yes, I know" nasty towards me, she just knows that she didn't use common sense and I always try to. And, Bobby, I've already stated that if she wants to pay, I will not grumble about it. Grit my teeth/bite my finger perhaps, but not vocally grumble. LOL
That's pretty funny. After my mother died, my 4 siblings rented a beach house for Thanksgiving and asked me to join them. "Free" does not mean "Without Cost." That was when my other brother (Bob) and I began talking about this crap...our mother (the center of the mess) was now dead, and during that holiday Bob had seen some pretty nasty stuff.
@Cody Fousnaugh - go to store, make a meal for the three of you. Or order out ,break out the good paper plates..wha la .. lunch is served. Or just let your wife handle it, since she's paying and it is her sister. Luckily this is not an all the time thing- so go with the flow and be done with it. Then after ole sis is gone ask your wife she feels compelled talk badly about her sister, but treat her with so much concern.
Now, the funny, but not so funny to wife's mom, concerning her brother: He made two trips to Vegas and told everyone that his boss paid airline tickets and hotel room. Well, well, well, he finally confessed, before MIL died that he had taken money from an account that MIL had and had entrusted him with, to go to Vegas. When MIL asked for some money from the account, he told her that what was available to be withdrawn, was gone. His words were, "just how do you think I was able to come to Las Vegas those times?" She told him, "you told us your boss paid for those trips." He said, "sorry, but I lied". What happened didn't go over very well with the family, especially MIL. Now, just what sort of banking account did he have access to and able to draw money out of without her consent, we don't know, but there was such an account. Then, my SIL (wife's sister) had quite a bit of marital problems before her husband passed. When she was in college, she wanted to meet/marry a Pastor. She met him and they married. He had a Masters Degree in Theology, his own church, but after a while lost it all. He didn't like, at all, SIL taking any kind of vacation and didn't want to go with her to visit grandkids. He had a medical problem with a foot, she didn't want to be a nurse, so he moved out of the condo. He found someplace to live, that included a nurse dropping by during the week. By this time, dear SIL had taken her wedding set off, but nobody in the family noticed but me. He wound up on life-support and then SIL and daughters decided to take him off. SIL doesn't miss him at all, and when asked by cemetery if she wanted her ashes to be placed by his, she told them "absolutely not". Like I said, very sarcastically..........very loving/thoughtful family! Yea, right.
That's exactly what I'm going to do, but I already know about why my wife does what she does concerning her sister. However, no eating at home. Breakfast at IHOP and dinner/supper at Cracker Barrel or perhaps Golden Corral. I do look forward to seeing SIL, but there have been a number of times we have disagreed on something. I'm not afraid to disagree with her, whereas my wife doesn't like doing that at all. IOW, as my wife says "I don't like confrontation", and she means that. But, towards me, sometimes it happens.
And THOSE are the people who will point the finger and call you selfish if you don't do everything for them. That's too bad for your wife. Lots of similarities with my background. I'm surprised she talks to that brother if that's how he shanked their mother (and there is no justification for doing that, I don't care how big of a witch she was...assuming you're getting the entire story.)
Mom, wife's mother, was a nice lady, even though she didn't understand why her daughter, my wife, had to learn some rodeo things to be part of the rodeo family I was in. I told mom, "it just has to be that way" and my wife completely understood. Took my wife a very short time to learn the rodeo lingo used in rodeo and the different events. She wanted to be a part of rodeo that bad. What I told you concerning mom (MIL) and wife's brother was told to us by both. But, mom didn't want some money for herself, she wanted it to help her one daughter, the Schizophrenia one (diagnosed that). Wife's brother doesn't like that sister at all! Why do we still talk to him and, out of all family members, he only talks to us..........? Actually, my wife couldn't believe how her brother and I got along when we first met. She was very stunned about that. To a point, him and I have the same sarcastic/humorous personality.
Me, too. It's anger turned sideways. Pay attention to most comedians. There's an edge to their humor.