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Aging Alone

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Beth Gallagher, Sep 20, 2022.

  1. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    Well, I am an older lady willing to take part in conversation. If I did not have a good situation of my own, I would take up such an offer. But maybe a younger woman of say, 50, would be a better choice. I have difficulty cleaning my own house and doing my own chores at this age.
    It would seem that this is the time someone might jump at the chance of the security of raising one's own food. Many can no longer afford to buy a house or even rent one.
    I would worry a little about someone taking advantage (stealing) from a stranger.
     
    #91
  2. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I've wondered about that myself, but I've lived alone my entire adult life except for 18 months of marriage. So being alone with my own thoughts (with a smattering of human contact) is my forever normal state of being.

    I'd worry about being thrown in a hole at the back of my property while my new friend and his/her significant other live rent-free in my house. I'd find a way to come back...
     
    #92
  3. Don Roles

    Don Roles Well-Known Member
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    John, whats your secret in staying sane? I am not and never have been a sociable type but do enjoy occasional company and whilst running my repair business had a lot of folks in and out each week, my wife and I were never 'lovey dovey' but just comfortable for all of those 40 years and without that I would have been early to the funny farm I suspect!
     
    #93
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  4. Don Roles

    Don Roles Well-Known Member
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    Thank you Mary for those words, some responses else where on this forum to a light weight piece about a similar subject left me wondering how cynical this group was. My inquiries over the last couple of years have brought home to me the vast divide between the 'in town' folk and services and the rural 'out in the country' folks, and I am not talking about city folk here but rural area towns and communities.

    In talking to some of the social agency's it seems that most elderly widowed folk have, at least in part, been forced to move into town to access supportive services without the need to own and operate a vehicle. Although I still drive and have a vehicle I will admit that without my son taking care of the grocery shopping I would probably be in some tiny in town apartment hating every minute of it! I suspect I am not alone in that situation nor are many already there not missing their country roots.
     
    #94
  5. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I can see where you would like to have someone to live there and help out and it would provide that person with a home if they needed a place to live.
    The other side of that, which would scare me from moving in with another person, is that there is no security of being able to continue living there, like you have when you rent or own your own home.
    What if the owner and the helper person got in an argument, and then the owner just tells the other person to move out right then. She would have no legal recourse except to leave the home immediately.
    This might be part of the reason that you are having no answers to your search for.a roommate, @Don Roles .
     
    #95
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  6. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    Or if there was an argument and the person refused to move. Depending on the laws in your state, evicting someone from your home could be lengthy and expensive.
     
    #96
  7. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    There are times I get lonely, just as there are times I've dated and wish I were by myself. Nothing is perfect. I imagine we all know that. It depends on what your preferred steady state is.
     
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  8. Shirley Martin

    Shirley Martin Supreme Member
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    What if the homeowner is a crazed ax murderer on the prowl for his next victim? :eek:
    :) Shades of Stephen King!!!!!:D
     
    #98
  9. Don Roles

    Don Roles Well-Known Member
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    I have thought long and hard about that Yvonna and have been unable to come up with a method of keeping both parities totally comfortable, I know I am not going to toss a 'tenant' out on the street but she does not, nor do I know that she will not abuse the situation which at least here in Ontario gives a 'tenant' a lot pf protections in this situation. Add to that that if it is a verbal arrangement with no money changing hands then is gets legally very complex, add to that if a male and a female live in a household in a 'shared' arrangement for a period of time without a legal arrangement the householder can find themselves in even deeper financial trouble!

    Believe me I have thought of all these issues, my own sanity sorta comes before such things at this point!
     
    #99
  10. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    Evicting someone is not that lengthy and expensive. You need to know the laws of your state. Things must be done in a particular order. But evictions won't allow you to just throw someone out. It is not instantaneous.
     
    #100
  11. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    Never date someone named Cujo, even if they are a saint.
     
    #101
  12. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    If I were in Don’s position, I’d make sure that no applicants are taking lithium.
     
    #102
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  13. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    Hindsight is 20/20.

    Ask me how I know...
     
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  14. Bobby Cole

    Bobby Cole Supreme Member
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    Dated a manic depressive or a plain ol’ bi-polar? For me…..both.
     
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  15. Tony Page

    Tony Page Veteran Member
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