Children With Too Much Control

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Marie Mallery, Feb 12, 2024.

  1. Marie Mallery

    Marie Mallery Veteran Member
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    I have 3 kids all senior citizens now. Jake helped me raise them form age 6-9 and was a great father, grandfather and great grand now. all of them like him more than me.
    I think too many kids today have too much control and it is not good for them. This came up yesterday with my daughter who has custody of 4 of her grandkids. They are back with their mother now, but we think she is using again so not for long. The woman has had too many chances and too little discipline, but daughter is realizing bailing her out of all her trouble for past 15 years was a bad thing to do,
    Her oldest granddaughter wants to come live with her again, but she 'finally' told her she would have to go to school in her town if she did.
    Before daughter would drive her to and from school; [ 40-mile round trip] each day! I told her it was not only foolish but dangerous being on the road with 4 kids every day, plus kids involved in school sports.
    The kids are aged 6-11 now.
    I have 17 grand kids spreaded out in Houston Tx. and North Ga.5 are step grands in TX. We lost one the 26 yo to suicide last year and one to crib death in early 90s ,both of them were sons ,sons.
    I don't even remember how many great grands we have now.Don't feel like counting.

    I think if the youth of today more responsibility and less control had they would have a better life. I guess mine were lucky we couldn't afford to spoil them. I was very strict they use to say too strict, now they say they are glad I was. I also think luck had something to do with it, and of course the times.
     
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  2. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    This is why I get along with farm and ranch young folks much better than I do with other young folks. Like I did, farm and ranch young people have responsibilities of taking care of livestock. It just seems to me like there is so much more respect towards parents of farm/ranch kids. Only our (wife/I) prospective of your thread, but we've seen, and met, a lot of young folks that are in FFA and 4-H that were showing livestock at local fairs.
     
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  3. Marie Mallery

    Marie Mallery Veteran Member
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    Saying this I also feel really heartbroken for kids now who future is not looking good. I worry about my family and their kids.
    Sometimes I will get upset then think of what these kids today deal with and feel terrible for complaining about them. I always call and apologize to daughter for running my mouth, she says, that's ok mom, I do same with my grown kids.
     
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  4. Ken Anderson

    Ken Anderson Senior Staff
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    I think the biggest problem we have, as far as kids today are concerned, is that the fabric of society is being intentionally dismantled. In a world where two plus two doesn't necessarily equal four, where there are an unlimited number of genders, and where men are expected to menstruate and bear children, I don't know that it's reasonable to expect kids to find their place in the world. In a time when governments, schools, the media, and science are in the business of spreading lies, propaganda, and misinformation, we should expect that children will be confused.

    As far as control goes, parents are expected, under the penalty of law, to control their children, yet the educational and legal systems are geared toward denying parental control, so that parents have the responsibilities but not the means of exerting control over their children, in that they are undermined at every turn.

    I don't know that filling time is the answer, either. While there are societal advantages to children having responsibilities in the home, childhood is also a time for creativity, and this is often denied by overfilled schedules. While some kids are left with nothing to do and without the means for healthy pursuits, others have nearly every minute of every day planned out for them, with organized sports and other activities. I was in Boy Scouts, attended church, and played Little League for a couple of summers before I realized that my dad would be okay with me not doing so. With several decades between me and my childhood, I have a lot of memories from Boy Scouts that I value, but most of the things that are important to me from my childhood were the things that my friends, cousins, brothers, and I came up with by ourselves.
     
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  5. Kate Ellery

    Kate Ellery Supreme Member
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    I’ve mentioned this before , our neighbours adult Son 30+ DIL and 2 children have recently sold their home in the city
    That was our neighbours first home when they got married ….before the son was born ….

    Son , DiL 2 kids are living with neighbours while having a home built next door to his parents ( our neighbours)

    any way the son was / is quite proud of the fact his son who’s 3 in May can recite Kevin “bloody “ Wilson word for word
    I’ve never lowered my standards by even listening to KBW but from what I believe he had / has the biggest foul mouth born …..long before swearing became just an everyday word ….

    Now they have lost control of this Kid , they tell him to go to bed and he tells them to Get F …you C ‘s so they sit up at night till the kid will go to bed ..usually very late ..like 12~ pm 1 am and they have a girl who’s going to exactly the same when she can talk ….and with a name like she has I’m sure she will be teased at school that will make her swear worse than a sailor ….

    I tell you what he’d have my hand prints on is backside if he spoke to us in that manner ….so he is ruling his parents at not even 3 years old ..and they think he’s so cute …by being able to use such .foul language at that age

    Lots of teens bash and even kill parents in Aust now days if they can’t get their own way by swearing so let’s see what happens as this kid and his sister are like in 6-7 years time
     
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    Last edited: Mar 12, 2024

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