What I was meaning is, if one person is doing all of the calling to someone, the person doing all of the calling can get tired of calling. Just like strangers: I can say "hello" to a stranger, just like a stranger can say "hello" to me without me saying it first.
So right! The last time I went to New York City, I first thought the people were unfriendly. But it took no time to find out if you smiled or said hello, they responded. I think the reputation comes from people living in an overcrowded, loud, stressful environment and having to become somewhat introspective just to get through the day without screaming. I was pushing my cousin's toddler around in a stroller and she was at the friendly stage where she didn't know a stranger. She'd say, "HI! I ZOE! I LOVE YOU!" to everyone and people just melted. Fierce-looking businessmen would crouch down on the sidewalk to talk to her. The street people were in love. The cops talked to her. Now, I did learn rather quickly to avoid being "friendly" on the subway, but just not quickly enough. We had a driver during the day and when I told him I was taking a subway that evening to go visit a friend, he begged me not to. I was determined to and off I went. I remember his one piece of advice: DO NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH ANYONE! Well, of course, I did and I found myself during the entirety of my trip being preached to by ......well.....someone who was convinced that I was possessed by an evil spirit and I needed his prayers to get rid of it. He knelt down in front of me and tried to hold my hands while loudly screeching in tongues. I tried to move but couldn't get anywhere. Other people were looking at me in sympathy but also with the look of "well, you asked for it." Needless to say, my trip back to the apartment was spent with my eyes firmly focused on my knees. I think what you put into New York City (and tons of other places, too) is what you get out of it. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.