Meet Another Of My Assisted Living Friends

Discussion in 'Family & Relationships' started by Lon Tanner, Apr 6, 2021.

  1. Lois Winters

    Lois Winters Veteran Member
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    If someone served in the military during any war, they are considered veterans of said war regardless of whatever discipline or field they served in. That marker was no mistake.
    I was commissioned in the AF in 1954 as an Air Force Nurse. Now, even though the Korean War had reached the cease fire state, things in our military were not finalized until midnight of 1954, ergo, I am a Korean War Vet.
     
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  2. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    Thanks for that, Lois. I had no idea.

    I just took a quick look and am hard-pressed to find where anyone might have slipped a military career in between wars.
     
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  3. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Supreme Member
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    Wouldn't they have to press charges against me? They would never do that.
     
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  4. Lois Winters

    Lois Winters Veteran Member
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    You do not live in NJ these days, Lon. There are predators out there with their phones taking pictures of anyone and everyone for whatever reason and believe me, if you get caught, it's a criminal offense here.
     
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  5. Cody Fousnaugh

    Cody Fousnaugh Supreme Member
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    Louis, I'm sure there are tourist attractions in NJ where people take camera or iPhone pictures. When folks are walking around a tourist attraction, it's impossible not to include people in pictures.
     
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  6. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    If you are standing in a public place, you can take a picture of anything you see that's in the public space...including people. (Yes, I know Lon's assisted living is private property...I'm speaking in generalities.) The exceptions are where people have an expectation of privacy, like bathrooms or locker rooms. And you can't be in a public place and take pictures of someone on private property. And many places you might think of as being public are actually private: shopping malls, stores, theaters, etc. "Publicly accessible" and "Publicly owned"are not the same thing.

    I found one reference (but not the statute) that says New Jersey’s video recording laws prohibit cameras in specific locations, including locker rooms, restrooms and in those places in which a person is likely to be viewed in partial or full nudity. But that merely gives specific examples of the "expectation of privacy" wording other states have. I don't see anything especially restrictive there...but I'm not a lawyer. I'd be interested to see if anyone can find info on things being more restrictive...in any state. There would be a lot of push-back from photographers/videographers at all levels (professional and amateur.)
     
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  7. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I just posted a similar thought, but consider this: The Eiffel Tower is illegal to photograph at night time, as the light show is legally protected. There are countries that do not have what they call The Freedom of Panarama Law, meaning that in those nations, you can get in trouble by photographing certain monuments, buildings, statues, etc. that are out-of-doors in the public square...so you could take a picture of your wife while on vacation, and if one of those protected things ends up in the background, you are in trouble. You might be permitted to take your picture in front of the Pyramide du Louvre while on vacation in Paris, but don't post it on your Facebook page or you'll be in legal trouble for publishing it.

    So the concern in some places is broader than photographing the occasional stranger. Insane, isn't it?
     
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  8. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Supreme Member
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    I have seen Mary at meals in our dining room always eating by herself at the same table for two. Tonight I asked if I could join her and she said yes. She has been at Oakmont since it opened six years ago and eats alone because most eating in the dining room are newbies and sit together. I have been here four years and also have generally eaten alone for the same reason. Mary is retired civil service, totally computer literate and from Up State New York. I am from New Jersey. We both have daughters in Fresno. Her voice pitch is such that I can hear her a bit with my rotten hearing. She consented to my taking her picture which I have attached. I will look forward to future visits with her. There MARY PLAUSON.jpg are not many of us still here from we first came.
     
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  9. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I did not know that the facility was only 6 years old.

    So why do the newbies and the old timers self-segregate? That's strange. There can't be so many people there that you don't recognize the same faces day after day after day. I would think that everyone knows everybody...it would take an effort not to.
     
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  10. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    Very sad to me that one is in a social assisted living environment and has to eat alone unless they chose to. That was thoughtful of you Lon to ask to join her and get permission for the photo. I guess senior retirement assisted living is like any other social gathering where cliques are formed.
     
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  11. Yvonne Smith

    Yvonne Smith Senior Staff
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    I think that is so wonderful that you have met Mary and found a new friend, @Lon Tanner , and it looks like Mary is happy, too ! Even better is that she is also computer literate, so you can send text messages back and forth when verbal discussion is hard because of your hearing.
    My friend Evelyn lived in an apartment complex where a totally deaf woman also lived. She said that they would have coffee together in the mornings and her apartment and message each other back and forth for their morning conversation.
    I know that you have said that most of the people you have met before were not interested in computers and could not text, so I think that this might be the start of a good friendship for both of you.
     
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  12. Lon Tanner

    Lon Tanner Supreme Member
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    As Faye says-------They form cliques.
     
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  13. Nancy Hart

    Nancy Hart Veteran Member
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    Some people just enjoy being in smaller groups. I do.

    If a group gets much larger than 4, the conversation splinters off into those sitting right next to you anyway, or one person (usually the one with the loudest voice) talks, and everyone else listens. Especially difficult if you are a little hard of hearing like I'm getting to be.

    IMO, it's only a clique when the conversation is mostly gossiping about, or making fun of, everyone not in the group. Kind of like junior high school. ;)
     
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  14. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    I wonder if some of the new people try to invite themselves to the tables of existing residents, and when they get rebuffed (because understandably not everyone wants their dining space invaded by strangers), the new arrivals form their own circle of friends and don't make the effort again.
     
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  15. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    This reminds me of a Club Med I did a while ago. It was at Martinique, and there were guests from all over the world, mostly America, Europe and South America. My favorite memories are of mealtimes. You served yourself buffet-style, and took your food to the covered pavilion where there were tables seating 8-10. One of the staff took you to a random table, and you got to break bread with different people from different countries each meal. I really enjoyed it. Of course, we were all on vacation at a Club Med, so the attitudes were always upbeat.

    This was in 1990, and I still recall the newlyweds from Sweden and a bunch of other folks I dined with. I'm surprised I enjoyed it so much...I'm such a curmudgeon.
     
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