OK. Next pile, scoop it up gently, put it on a board to dry, glue it down and then spray paint it gold. Put it in a box, gift wrap it and put it on his porch. I know people who don't deal with manure who would be highly offended by this. Better yet, put a price tag on it-- about $20. They used to make cow pie clocks around here. I thought they were a riot but many thought of them as disgusting. ???