Science · Mar 31, 2023 · 62 Scientists Discover Strong Correlation Between Trusting Government And Eating Paint Chips
Some of these are “meh” but a couple a really good. https://www.boredpanda.com/satirica...oogle&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic
“NEW YORK, NY — After taking great pride in the label of "sanctuary city," New York City officials have reportedly begun to panic due to actually having to serve as a sanctuary for incoming illegal immigrants. "We didn't really think it through with the title," said Mayor Eric Adams. "In reality, our desire was to call attention to ourselves and signal how virtuous we are. As in most cases, we're not actually interested in providing care and shelter to any people in need. We want to tell other people they have to do it instead." … “"This isn't how liberalism works, folks," said local activist Stinson Dean. "We're supposed to be all talk. We tell everyone how much we care, scold them for not caring as much as we do, and then do nothing. Get these brown people out of my neighborhood!"” https://babylonbee.com/news/sanctuary-city-bummed-now-that-it-has-to-do-the-actual-sanctuary-part
In related news, the Department of Education is requiring that paint chips be included in every school cafeteria meal. The campaign launched with the slogan "Get The Lead In!"
Ah yes. There is a high probability that boys who do not have enough lead in the pencils will more than likely turn trans hence the new experimentation with paint chips in the school lunches. However, the experiment with how the new priority will affect females and it’s results will probably be published sometime in the fall of 2030.
A subordinate reason for the government mandate on lead paint is that these days it's only made in China.