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What, Really, Does A Dying Person Think Of?

Discussion in 'Reading & Writing' started by Michelle Keiser, Mar 22, 2015.

  1. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    My dad was in WW2, but being of German descent, they did not put him in a combat role...he was in charge of munitions disposal. But he was there, and I know he saw his share of stuff. He only told me one story, but I was too young to think to draw more out of him (just so he could purge.)

    It would make an interesting topic: for those who have been surrounded by death (soldiers, EMS & police, doctors & nurses, morticians), how has it effected your view of it?
     
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  2. Thomas Stillhere

    Thomas Stillhere Very Well-Known Member
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    My opinion is really simple, there is no human who will escape death. We just try to evade it for as long as we possibly can. I think if we have time we can cope with knowing our time is short. My Mother and Grandmother were very strong in the end, I really believe my Grandmother was tired of living because every last person in her life with the exception of my Mother and we kids were left. All the family she knew as a youngster, brothers and sisters had all already gone. She became really sad and it always surprised me to see how many friends she still had from the very old days like the late 1900s and 20s on up. She was born in 1907 so a lot passed before her eyes. I met some old friends of hers when we all moved back to Oklahoma City, she had not seen those friends for over 40 years and I thought about how young they were when they first became friends. I was only like 13 but I was happy she got to see them again because they were all getting pretty old then. In her end she just went to sleep for a noon nap and never woke up. I strive to stay healthy as possible and so far so good. I get a lot of exercise thanks to these cats, I have to step over them, move around them, out run them, bend over to feed them, bend over again to pick up empty bowls etc. There are a total of 8 all together. Heh
     
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  3. John Brunner

    John Brunner Senior Staff
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    8 cats, huh? Just like that Bond flick.
     
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  4. Thomas Windom

    Thomas Windom Very Well-Known Member
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    Anybody ever see the movie “Ffolkes” starring Roger Moore. I didn’t find most of his acting remarkable but I thought he was good in this film. Anyway, the reason I mention it is he plays a gruff, uncaring anti-terrorist team leader who has an unexpected soft spot for cats. Not a bad movie if you haven’t seen it.
     
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  5. Thomas Stillhere

    Thomas Stillhere Very Well-Known Member
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    I love them but I did not go out and search for all of them, they found me or at least their mothers found a warm place to hide them in my kitchen. So I kept the first 3 wanting to keep them a family, the fourth one of their litter died after 2 days. Then after they got a few months old another outside cat I was familiar with had a litter of 4 and they were following her around so I started feeding all of those on the front porch each morning and night. They learned from their mother how to get inside my bathroom thru the hole under the vanity for the plumbing. I let them continue to come in from the cold and sleep in the bathroom because it was heated. I feed them there each morning and they go and come as they please.:D
     
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  6. John Houlihan

    John Houlihan Very Well-Known Member
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    What does a dying person think of? This reminds me of a deathbed story.

    Assume a character named Ivan is on his deathbed. He remembers his father’s advice to become an accountant rather than an artist. So, he became an accountant. His mother’s advice was to marry Olga rather than Alina. So, he married Olga. And so it was with every difficult decision Ivan made during his lifetime. Ask for advice and follow it. He had been satisfied with this approach.

    With death closing in, however, Ivan begins to regret his life choices. He thinks, “Oh my God, maybe I should have become an artist instead of an accountant. Maybe I should have married Alina instead of Olga. Maybe I got it all wrong.”

    What do you think the moral of the story is?
     
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  7. Tony Nathanson

    Tony Nathanson Very Well-Known Member
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    I think it depends on what someone died of. If someone is in terrible pain, they'd probably look forward to dying; I know I would.
    When my mom became bedridden for her last 4 months, during her non-dementia times, she told me: "Every night when I go to sleep, I pray I won't wake up."
    I don't blame her; I wouldn't be accepting of much disability.
     
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  8. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    Whatever?
     
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  9. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    I am back to What God Wants by Neale Walsch. Very comforting. Helps me understand a lot of things.
     
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  10. Beth Gallagher

    Beth Gallagher Supreme Member
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    I was scrolling through my Kindle e-book purchases and noticed a title I purchased in 2017... Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End, by Dr. Atul Gawande. I don't know what made me buy the book at that time, but I have queued it up to read as soon as I finish the Stephen King novel. :oops: (Yes, yes. I buy too many books.)

    I skimmed some reviews* and was struck by this one...

    "Being Mortal essentially provides a long, thoughtful, multi-faceted, historically-grounded complaint about the medicalization of aging and death, from someone who really knows and cares. Older adults may become less capable of caring for themselves in various ways, but for the most part they still want the things they always wanted: autonomy in their schedules and surroundings, community, privacy, a specific and concrete reason to get up in the morning. It’s a hell of a demand, to ask people to adjust to completely new surroundings and routines when they’ve never been older and/or sicker."

    Not completely sure this book will have anything to contribute to a What Really Does a Dying Person Think Of? thread but I'll get back to you. :D

    _____________________________
    *
    Speaking of book reviews, if I read one more comment that describes a book as "riveting" or "thought-provoking" I believe I shall behave badly. o_O
     
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  11. Faye Fox

    Faye Fox Veteran Member
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    On my dying days, I think of the same things I do on the days when I am not dying. :)
     
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  12. John Houlihan

    John Houlihan Very Well-Known Member
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    Hi Tony,

    So sorry to hear about your mother. It must have been very hard on you. My parents and all my siblings also had a lot of suffering before they died. Their suffering has raised a lot of questions in my mind. I’m the last man standing and wonder what I will do. I have mixed feelings at this time, but I might consider moving to a right-to-die state. Originally, there was only Oregon. But now it is also legal in California, Vermont, Washington, Montana, Colorado, and Hawaii.

    John
     
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  13. John Houlihan

    John Houlihan Very Well-Known Member
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    He is one of my favorites. I was in a rut until I discovered his "Conversations with God."
     
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  14. John Houlihan

    John Houlihan Very Well-Known Member
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    For me, the moral of the story is that I can trust some outside sources up to a point, but all the final choices I make in life define who and what I really am. I own those choices; therefore the only one I can trust to get it right is my higher self.
     
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  15. Mary Stetler

    Mary Stetler Veteran Member
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    https://www.youtube.com/@hospicenursejulie

    This hospice nurse Julie helps in understanding the process of dying.
    I figure, being a procrastinator at heart, I am putting it off for as long as possible, if not too much pain. But lately, I am more worried about who is left and what they will do. I have tried to bring up the subject and no one wants to discuss. I don't care what is done with me. But I don't want all my 'fortune' spent on hospital bills. Or even a funeral.
    I can write stuff down, but I don't want a will enforced on family with other ideas.
    Maybe just write stuff down to take the pressure off of them?
    Some people think cremation but there is always one kid who can't bring themselves to burn up mom.
    ?
    I was at a funeral home recently with an urn and a couple of vases of red carnations in a spotlight. It was very pretty but cost thousands of dollars that this woman barely had.
    Hubby wants us buried up the hill but you could almost buy a car for the price of that.
    And what about my preps?!;)
     
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